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[shawn]

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"what do i do to get your moms trust back, bubba?" i say softly to avery, who's shuffling about on her stomach, her neck muscles now getting strong enough for her to be able to hold her head up for short periods of time, and move her head to sounds. she looks up at me, letting out a small gurgle, before rolling over onto her back, moving her legs up in the air.

anya had gone out with brian and connor, while i was still in the house, looking after avery, and taking it easy today. it only hit me fully after anya and i talked things through that i wasn't taking the time to look after avery, and give anya the break she deserves from being the best mom in the world.

"i could take her out for dinner? give her a nice date?" i suggest. avery looks at me again and blinks blankly. "no?" she gurgles again, making me chuckle softly to myself. "maybe i could take her to the beach, and we could have a picnic there? she loves picnics so much," avery turns back onto her stomach, as i sigh, reaching under her and picking her up, letting her rest on my stomach. "next time you wake up, cry to wake me up instead of your mom, okay?"

"shawn, are you trying to make deals with your baby?" andrew chuckles to me, walking into the lounge, two glasses of water in his hands.

"yes," i mutter, rolling my eyes in response. "maybe you can help too, what can i do to make anya feel comfortable with me again?"

"that's something you're gonna have to deal with on your own kid," andrew says, patting my shoulder lightly. "show her you care for her trust."

"yeah but how?" andrew sighs at me, sitting down on the couch, as avery wriggles around in my arms.

"you and i both know i can't tell you how, but you know what she likes, and you know how she fell for you," he advises me. "use that to your benefit."

"yeah but how did she fall for me?" i ask, looking down at avery, seeing her chewing on her fist. "avery penelope, how many times?" i sigh, taking her hand out of her mouth, and replacing it with her small rubber ring, that she eagerly grabs onto and starts chewing.

"think shawn, think," andrew chuckles. "anyway, i'm gonna head to the arena and see if everything's okay for tomorrow," he sighs, standing up. "don't stress too much."

"don't stress? she could end things with me," i scoff. "we'll be co-parents and nothing else."

"i said what i could to help," andrew tells me. "focus on her, and how she makes you feel."

andrew leaves shortly after, leaving avery and i alone again. i sigh softly, looking back down at avery, who's shuffling over my chest, letting out random noises for attention.

"how about we go out for a walk?" i mumble, kissing her forehead softly, lifting her up as she gurgles away, not having a care in the world. i chuckle randomly to myself, before grabbing the carrying harness, putting avery down for a short moment, so i can strap her into the harness, and put the carrier over me, so my hands are free.

"right, we need milk, and your changing bag, and that stupid rubber ring-" i cut myself off with a sigh. "what are we actually doing, ave? can you tell me how to not be stupid?" avery let's out a long hum, raising her hands up and tapping them on my chin. "any ideas? please baby, tell me how i get your mom back."

then it hits me.

avery's little hand lands itself right onto my cheek firmly, basically slapping some sort of sense into me, making my eyes immediately widen.

"avery penelope mendes, you are a genius!" i grin, leaning down to kiss the top of her head. "right, we're definitely gonna have to go on a walk now. we need to go find that thai place i took your mom to when we hated each other."

-

she was sat opposite me, looking effortlessly beautiful as always; her hair pulled into a sleek ponytail, the late afternoon sunlight hitting her bare shoulders perfectly. her skin was glowing, as she stared down at the white menu in her hands, pulling her lower lip in between her lips, chewing on her lip slightly, whilst she decides what to eat.

"done staring?" anya shoots at me, looking up from the menu, her eyes holding nothing but pure sadness towards me. i frown slightly, putting my own menu down.

"sorry," i mumble, looking back down at the table.

"why did you bring me here shawn?" she finally comes out with, a soft sigh leaving her lips. "avery's alone with the boys and they're probably turning her into a spiderbaby-"

"she's fine with the boys-"

"why did you bring me here?" she mumbles, putting her menu down and looking at me with a completely unreadable expression. "please shawn, i just want to know-"

"i want to talk things out," i say gently to her, putting my own menu down, as she sighs, folding her arms to her chest.

"what could we possibly talk about? the fact that you said to my face that you wanted me to leave? or accusing me of cheating? or what about the practical verbal abuse you've been sending me?" she lists, her hard words making my heart flinch.

"anya please-"

"no shawn, don't 'anya please' me," she scoffs. "you really, really hurt me, and you can't even bother to muster a proper apology, or-or even begin to understand how betrayed and embarrassed i feel."

"well then tell me how you feel," i try to compromise, trying to not get angry at her, since we're outside and in a public space.

"i'm not talking about this here," she mumbles. "anyone could overhear, and i care about how you get seen by the public, so i don't want to tell you how i feel right now," she mutters softly, picking up her menu again. "can we just hurry up so we can get back before avery's bedtime?"

"yeah," i sigh, rolling my eyes slightly, picking up my menu again, deciding to order a papaya salad and a thai green curry. anya's phone begins to ring, making us both sigh simultaneously. she mumbles a quick sorry, before lifting her phone up to her ear to answer it.

"hello?" she asks, looking straight behind me to the fairly busy street. "what? oh fuck sake," she sighs. "yeah, yeah, i'll be there quickly," she mumbles, taking the white napkin off of her lap, putting it on her plate, before standing up. "yeah, just give her a toy or whatever, and that chewing ring, the pink one," anya says softly. "make sure you keep her head up, and slightly tilted forward, don't want her to choke," i furrow my eyebrows in confusion, standing up along with anya. "yeah just use the corner bri, thank you so much, i owe you one." she hangs up, dropping her shoulders, and letting a long sigh leave her lips.

"what happened? is ave okay?" i ask, concerned as anya rushes out of the restaurant. i quickly take my wallet out, handing one of the waitresses a twenty dollar bill before i walk out, seeing anya already on her phone and probably ordering an uber.

"s-she just threw up, she's been crying since we left- brian said she was bright red-" she panics, tapping away on her phone. "hurry the fuck up, i'm not waiting three fucking minutes!" she mumbles to her phone, letting a frustrated sigh leave her lips.

"hey, baby, she's gonna be okay," i try to say calmly, but my own emotions get in the way, leaving my voice to be slightly shaky. "it's only a bit of sick, she'll be fine babe, i promise," i say, placing my hand on her lower back. she quickly shuffles away from me, making my heart drop, before she shrugs, pushing out a soft frown.

"i-i guess," she whispers. "s-shes just never been ill before, this is her first time i-" she cuts herself off, seeing a car pull up on the curb. "let's just go."

"anya, she's going to be fine," i remind her, as we both slide into the uber, anya moving straight to the other side, looking out of the window almost immediately. "she's a strong little girl, she won't let a bit of vomit stop her from being the avery we know and love." i see a small smile twitch at anya's lips as she looks down at her lap. "she probably had her milk too fast or something, it's okay." anya nods, turning her head to look out of the window again, and that's enough to tell me to shut up, thinking that she wants some time to put her own thoughts into order.

"s-she is a mendes at the end of the day," she mumbles, making my heart jump, and a massive grin stretch over my face. "she's got the strong mendes gene." she looks up at me, a sad smile over her lips, as i send her a softer smile back, nodding.

"that she sure does."

-

"hey, made you some soup," i say gently, walking into the living room, seeing anya resting with her feet up on the futon, avery cuddled into her chest and fast asleep, her heavy breathing accompanying the quiet mumble of whatever show or movie anya's watching with the subtitles on.

anya looks up at me, sending me a small tired smile, as i sit down next to her, holding the bowl of soup in my hands.

"can you feed me?" she asks me softly, her voice a mere whisper to not wake avery up. "i'm so glad she only drank milk too fast," she mumbles, as i chuckle, holding out a spoonful of the soup.

"still a little fighter," i mumble, moving closer to anya as she clamps her mouth around the spoon, drinking the soup i made.

"still wanted to play with brian when we finally got her to calm down," anya giggles, looking down at avery. "poor baby."

"here, let me grab her while you eat," i say, putting the soup down on the table in front of us, reaching over and taking avery carefully out of anya's arms, resting her on my chest instead, as i stretch out on the couch, putting my legs up on the table. "what the heck are you even watching?" i ask, seeing a courtroom on the tv.

"no idea, honestly," she giggles, picking up the soup and immediately taking a few bites. "sorry we had to cut the shitty thai food early."

"i thought you liked that place," i ask, frowning slightly.

"shawn, you weren't the only one who had a bad stomach after that," she chuckles, as i rest one of my hands on avery's back.

"it really was shitty thai food," i grin, looking down at the sleeping baby in my arms. "she sleeps like you."

"she's a baby."

"yeah but she sticks her lower lip out like you do, and look, she balls her fists like you do too," i point out. "and she looks peaceful. you always look peaceful when you sleep."

"so you watch me sleep now?" she teases, making me chuckle softly.

"yeah i do, miss i fall asleep and nap whenever we're watching tv or cuddling."

"i was pregnant! i was tired!" she laughs, throwing her head back in humour. "you try carrying a baby in you, and then you try and say something about me falling asleep all the time."

"that's not how biology and anatomy works, sweetheart," i tease, making her scoff, a chuckle leaving her lips straight after.

"bringing the science words on me, eh? think you're too smart for your boots?" she continues, finishing her soup, and putting the bowl back down on the table.

"yes, yes i do," i answer simply, making her laugh again, before she sighs, looking straight ahead of her. "anya, i-"

"please don't," she quickly says. "it's late as it is, and i really don't want to start crying again."

"well when are we going to get the chance to actually talk things through?" i shoot back at her, suddenly feeling annoyed that she's trying to put it off, even though she's desperate to talk.

"please don't be like that shawn, i just put avery to sleep, and i'm tired as it is," she says, her voice soft and sleepy.

"i'm not being like anything, anya," i say, my voice dripping with sarcasm. "god sake, you advocate so much about communication, but when i actually want to talk, and when we have time to talk, you don't want to? makes so much sense."

"shawn, it's almost one in the morning, you have a show-"

"so?" i say, looking at her with a soft glare. "what's that got to do with it?" anya opens her mouth to respond, but quickly closes it, shaking her head softly, before standing up and picking up her bowl.

"just bring her to bed in the next half an hour, i'm going to sleep," she mumbles, her eyes suddenly going sad and droopy. "goodnight."

"fine then," i shoot back at her. "make sure you don't oversleep avery's first feed, you know, since you think i do nothing."

anya looks at me, an expression of confusion and hurt flashing over her face. she shakes her head yet again, before turning around at walking out of the lounge, leaving avery and i alone again.

"fuck," i mutter. "such a fucking idiot."