Dedicated to for the encouragement, for being awesome and for loving my bestie ❤

Taseer kept asking whether am okay, if I need anything and he cling to me like a gum. It was cute at first till it started getting on my nerves. That was how I endured him till it was time to go home, knowing fully well how shameless he is when it comes to me and the way he acted at home gives me a sinking feeling that he is gonna embarrass me in the presence of my parents and in law and simran is gonna love it with the whole of her heart, I am doomed to be surrounded by shameless people. When we reached home, I realised how much I have missed it and made a move to dash out into the house in a run, but no! Taseer has to burst my bubble by holding my hands with a stern look on his face " you're not going to do that, have you forgotten that you're not alone? " I gave him an incredulous look and with a duhh tone replied " I wasn't alone two weeks ago and you had no idea about it, I was perfectly alright and it won't change a thing right now"

" ehh naji, just be careful manalie, it's not as if you haven't seen them earlier " just then simran drove in and I have never been so happy to see someone in my life like never before.

" bye see you inside" I waved him off and turned my attention to my besty who is with mama and yaya Al amin, I jumped excitedly almost forgetting that I am married, my husband is watching and simran 's eyes looked like they will bulge out of their sockets.

" yaya Al amin what a pleasant surprise, saukan yaushe? And no one told me you're back "I pouted and he just smiled shaking his head

" I thought I will meet a more matured version of you ted bear but look what I'm met with, such a shame " he winked at me and I turned to mama who is looking at us with amusement .

"mama you see him ba, he didn't stop calling me ted bear, simmy please tell him that am a big girl now " I earned a chuckled from mama and an eye roll from simran, noory had a death grip on the car keys and he looked like he is gonna murder someone. "yahsalam! Mama I didn't even greet you I was carried away seeing this long lost habiby, ina wuni how's everyone" I squatted a little and from the corner of my eyes I saw Taseer stormed into the house, simran was giggling full force and Al amin looked confused.We talked for a while before we go into the house, simran and mama in front and Yaya Al amin and I followed suit a few steps behind talking and laughing. Ammy was happy to see yaya Al amin too and we had lots of fun going back to memory lane and the silly things we did, I noticed that Taseer is not himself and not ready to break the news so I excused my self and dragged him to my room.

" what's wrong with you noory? You are not saying anything to anyone and you looked grumpy if it's because I jumped, I am so sorry about it, it was out of reflex, I haven't seen yaya Al amin in four years " I ranted trying to explain myself. Then his cold and detached voice reached my ears

" you meant to say your boyfriend?" he asked and the way it sounded is like he's so sure about it. I burst out laughing. So that explains the way he shook hands with Al amin, the way he answers Ammy and Hajia's questions like he's been forced to ,so even my kindhearted husband can be jealous .I turned to a very pissed looking Taseer and held his hands

" there was nothing and there is nothing between yaya Al amin and I Taseer, he is the brother figure I've never had in my life, we've always been like this with each other and I am so sorry if I give you the wrong idea about us, there was no one for me you're my one and only till jannah in shaa Allah ,so please let this go and enjoy our home coming " I explained and he finally exhaled before saying it's okay, as we were descending the stairs we heard Alhamdulillah's and Allahu akbars everyone looks so happy and they were all grinning " what have we missed? " I asked with a confused expression.

" when are you planning on telling us? " Ammy asked

" telling you what?" I raised a brow

" that you're pregnant and we are soon going to be grandparents " Hajia said eyeing Taseer mischievously and I couldn't help but glare at simran while my poor new shy husband started scratching his head stammering. He can be shy afterall that's a great discovery.

I walked to where simran is sitting and I pinched her real hard ," You're evil wlh, you won't even let us do it ,now my poor baby is embarrassed " I whispered and she giggled , I wonder what's with her and giggling today maybe she's high on something. " Which of the babies ?the one inside or the big baby " she asked and I smacked her arm earning an ouch from her with a satisfied smile I turned my attention to Taseer and I saw him already warming up to Yaya Al amin, they made a great pair .We kept talking till it was time for isha prayers ,the men went to the masjid and we went up to my room to pray .

" How far about Ameer's issue habibty " I broached the dreaded topic to simran .she sighed " It's still the same thing , nothing changed but he came home last night and he had a private meeting with Abba, mama said he didn't tell her what they discussed and we never talked since after his mom forbade him ,just late night messages that he's thinking about me and no more " she looked so sad I wanted to fight off her demons and bring my jovial and care free friend back , indeed life is unfair and we never know what's coming for us until it get to us , who would've thought that something like this will ever come between Ameer and simran ?but then it's qadr Allah ,it has been destined and they can't escape it.

" It's a good sign habibty,we should continue praying innallaha ma'ana it will soon be over for good , just be ready for the outcome whether it's in your favor or against you " I consoled and she smiled .Just then Ammy came in with a smile and she hugged me , showering me with prayers ,Simran took it as a cue to leave us alone , it is a mother daughter moment , and she don't wanna intrude, not that we both mind but it was the right thing for her to do .Ammy asked about Amsterdam ,the food , the places I went ,what I feel when Taseer is in the hospital , how Aminah and Muhammad are faring with the new religion and all .I gave her intensive answers not hiding anything from her and I asked a lot of questions too , like how much she missed me , how's Abby's health , the things she does when she's bored and we laughed when she told me that there was a day she forgot that Hajia and I are not around and she made food for four arranged the table and then called on us ,to be met with the echoing sound of her voice , Abby almost bought a ticket for her,saying she's going crazy but backed out saying she's gonna leave him alone and he might end up coming back from work ,going to her room only to be met with an empty bed .

" I've missed you so so so so very much Ammiena " I cooed giving her a side hug .

" I've missed you more princess , and you should take extra good care of yourself now that you're not alone dear, Lantana will go with you ,I know you don't like the idea of having a maid around but we can't risk it " seriously ?even Ammy is in her over protective mode and I know better than to say no besides I know the kind of people am dealing with , over excited oldies who are going to be grandparents soon, he or she will be spoilt rotten I can sense that.

" OK Ammy ,am saying yes because of you , not that I really need a maid " I said and she nodded ,we went down to find mama ,Yaya Al amin and Simmy preparing to leave , we bade them goodbyes and I promised to come for a visit within the week , Taseer and Yaya Al amin exchanged phone numbers and Simran came to me whispering ' ex boyfriend and present hubby had reconciled with each other ' we burst out laughing and the elders gave us the stern look, we sobered up almost immediately ,I gave Simmy a hug mouthing it's good to see you before we see them off and came back to the living room. We chatted with Abby for a while, he told us how happy he is and looking forward to see his first wife or best friend before we finally called it a night and left to our new abode .

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Three months into my pregnancy, we've already settled at home, Taseer taking extra care of me and lantana keeping me company when he's not around. I was in the living room watching divergent when I heard my phone ringing and I paused the movie moving lackadaisically towards my room. It was simran and I called her back, she told me the long awaited news that Ameer's mother finally gave up and she came personally to their house crying her heart out and asking them to forgive her and allow her son to marry simran, she said she's going to come home and give me the details and I started jumping up and down saying Alhamdulillah over and over again doing some dance steps. It happened in slow motion, I ate banana earlier and in the process of discarding the peel in the dustbin,it fell on the ground and I stepped , I fell down hit my head hard and darkness evolved me.

I didn't know for how long I had been out , I opened my eyes slowly and the lights blinded me ,I had to shut them , I heard faint voices talking beside me and a Dr was called upon , he called my name slowly and gave me instructions to try and open my eyes slowly ,I did so opening them to a fraction and eventually I opened them widely. Taseer was sitting beside me with red rimmed eyes , Ammy and Hajia looked like they've cried too, what's wrong ? Why are they crying ? Where am I ? Then it came crashing down on me , I slipped ,hit my head and fainted ,yah Allah what about my baby ? I abruptly reached for my already bulging stomach to be met with a flat one , I whimpered and burst into heart wrenching sobs . Ammy held me whispering things I cannot comprehend while Hajia was crying too. Simran came in running into the room, panting like she has been chased ,she crashed into me and sobbed " it was my fault ,I shouldn't have called you ,knowing that you'll jubilate yahsalaam I can never forgive myself " she choked out I don't have the strength to console her .It was much later when I calmed down a bit that I was told what happened, Taseer had forgotten a file at home and he came into the room to meet me unconscious and in a pool of blood , he called home in panic and when he reached the hospital the baby is already gone.innalillahi wa inna ilaihi rajiun is what I kept repeating like a mantra ,wishing I can turn back time and not even eat the banana at all, wishing Simran had called but I didn't jubilate but rather prostrate in sujud al shukur and now all I was left with is a heavy heart mourning my baby who because of my carelessness had left the world before coming into it .No amount of cajoling and threats made me eat ,I starved myself for days till Ammy got tired of begging me and exploded ." Do you think this Is not hard on us too? It was not meant to be , a lot of mother's have lost their children at childbirth and they moved on because they have faith in Allah and know that it was their destiny to go through such pain, we all had put our love ,time and attention to your pregnancy forgetting that Allah can take it away from us , I know it's hard Manalie. But you should please have faith and pass this test , be there for your husband he's hurting too and seeing you in this condition is not helping him in any way but rather hurting him more ,get up and have a bath, pray and eat please , there is still hope kinji ya'ta hakuri akeyi" I cried for almost fifteen minutes recalling all those nights that Taseer will put his ears to my stomach and talk endlessly to the not so visible bump ,the baby shoppings, the extra care and time he will take ,telling me how we are going to bring up our child ,I wiped my tears and went into the bathroom ,having a strong resolve that I will pass this test also like I have passed the test before having Taseer as my husband ,I came out to meet Taseer sitting on the bed patiently waiting for me .I gave him a smile and he hugged me ,I've never seen him this vulnerable " Allah knows best Hayatee ,please don't go into depression I can't loose you both, have faith habibatie, Allah will bless us with another baby soon" he was crying from the sound of his voice and I hugged him tighter to me,letting the tears flow freely.

" Shhh don't cry, have you forgotten that you're the man of the house ? My pillar of hope and strength? If you keep breaking down like this I am going to die also " he shushed me before I could utter another word , we talked for a while and I begged him to tell the Dr that I am okay and he should discharge me .Simran was banned from coming because she kept blaming herself and no amount of chastising made her stop .So she was grounded at home ,we only talk on phone and her resolve didn't falter ,she will still say sorry and start crying , I will talk to her when I get home.

A month after my miscarriage ,everything went back to normal and Taseer had been working very hard to start his own company having Ameer and Yaya Al amin as his partners .Yaya Al amin is a computer guru , Ameer a business administrator and my hubby and architect so their alliance is a perfect match .

I came to learn that Ameer's mother was having a secret which only her sister knew, and the devil blackmailed her with it knowing that it will tarnish her image and maybe break her marriage if she's exposed .And her daughter couldn't find any respectable suitor which made her father to give them a deadline , is either she bring a husband or he will marry her off in the mosque for free .That's what made Hajia Amna to blackmail Ameer's mother into submitting to her demands knowing that her son didn't deserve to be dragged into her mess. What changed her mind is still unknown to us .

I wanted to surprise Taseer by cooking Dambu for him, he once told me that it is his favorite traditional dish , Lantana helped a lot and after steaming it I blend pineapple and made a pineapple and coconut drink with milk .I arranged everything on the table and left lantana to clean the kitchen and went to the bathroom to freshen up. As I was applying kohl to my eyes, I heard the sound of Taseer's horn and I hurriedly wrapped my veil and went out to welcome him, to my disappointment he is with Yaya Al amin, I pouted and he winked at me knowing fully well that I was waiting for him to come home , I told him that on WhatsApp when I was cooking .

" Sannunku da zuwa" I greeted and Yaya Al amin shook his head giving me a thumbs up .

" I don't wanna be a third wheel Taseer, see how dazzling your wife is looking, she probably didn't expect you to bring me but I vowed to come and eat the dambu, blame your husband that won't keep his mouth shut in the office , so I will just eat to my fill and leave you guys to your love nest " He said giggling .I gave him a glare collecting Taseer's laptop bag.

" You're always welcome here you know ,just don't come unannounced next time " the last part was meant for Taseer and he knew it .

" Sorry Hayatee, I called you didn't pick so I left you a message " he explained.

" Its okay big boys now come and fill your intestines " with that I led them to the table .I wanted to serve and feed Taseer , he has been too busy these days that we hardly eat together but thanks to Al amin he had to ruin everything. I am not angry that he came , but just not happy that my plans had been busted .We ate in silence until Yaya Al amin decided to break it .

" Gaskiya Ammy trained you well, irin wannan super delicious meal haka?Taseer my lunch flask will be in your house from now on " he winked at Taseer who gave him a playful glare.

" My wife is not a maid neither a Cook, her delicious dishes are only meant for my taste buds ,if you wanna have a hearty lunch everyday, go find a wife Malam" Taseer teased and Al amin frowned.

" He is afraid of women Manalie, talk to your brother please ,convince him to get a wife " I bulged my eyes out in surprise.

" We don't bite Yaya Al amin , give us a try, I wish I have a friend , I would've given her to you. But Jiddah Is married ,I will search Google tho." We kept teasing him and making weird suggestions till he gets fed up and left.

After isha salah , Taseer called me to the gazebo where he had already spread a mat and we silently gazed at the stars. We might have lost something precious but the bound we share is unshakable and we will survive through it all in shaa Allah .Together , we are strong and that's our ultimate weapon.