I'm sitting on the couch watching a movie with everyone. Clint and nat got up and left, I'm not sure why.

Stephen got called to the med bay, so now it just me, cap, and bucky. I hear the elevator ding and crying. I turn around and see Peter, sobbing.

I stand up quickly and run over to him. "Peter? What's wrong?" I say, grabbing his shoulders. He tries to say something but I can't understand him. I see a piece of paper in his hand and he gives it to me.

Dear mom,

You did this to me. You always told me I was an accident. Now I'm umdoing the mistake you made. Tell Peter that I love him. Tell ned and mj that they were the best friends anyone could ever have. Tell them that I'm sorry, that I was already dead. Don't forget that you did this to me, you made me broken. Now I get to be with the family that loves me. I get to be with dad and Lewis. This is your fault.

Wade.

As I read it my heart shattered. Wade seemed like such a happy kid. What the hell happened? If it made Peter this upset it has to be real.

I pull Peter into a hug and he just sobs into my chest. Cap walk up behind me "ways going on?" He says, putting a hand on peters shoulder.

I don't say anything and just hand him the note. He reads it and starts to cry. I've never seen him cry, but now he was angery and crying.

"wade is around your age right Peter?" He says, through his teeth. Peter nods and I turn to cap. "Wade is his boyfriend." I say quietly.

Cap just turns around and walks back to living room.

Steve walls into the living room, crying. He almost never cries. I see a paper in his hand and assume the worst.

I get up and walk over to him. "Steve? Are you feeling ok?" I say, taking the paper from him. "just read it." He says through his teeth.

I read the paper and my heart sinks. Wade is like 16 right? Christ. "That's why Stephen was called to the med bay..." I say quietly.

I walk into the hallway and see tony and Peter sitting in the kitchen. Peter is crying and tony is trying to find the little cupcakes he got for Peter.

I walk in and sit next to Peter. "it not your fault." I say, putting my hand on his back. He melts into me and starts sobbing.

"how did I not see I just he tells me everything and he sucks at lying and I could of stoped him and-" Peter says through sobs.

"its ok. It's not your fault. Just know that." I say, rubbing his back. Tony sighed and puts a box of store bought cupcakes unfront of Peter.

Peter pushes the plate away and stands up. He stops crying and walks to his room. Poor kid.

I walk to my room and sit on my bed. I can't stand to make myself eat.

I could have stopped this. I should have stopped this. I didn't see it. I should have fucking seen it.

I walk to my bathroom. I need to feel something safe. Even if its hurting me, it feels safe.

I dig through my back pack and find my blades. Usually I would have reused the one I used last, but I need the sharpest one I can find.

Slowly, I put the blade to arm, hesitating a moment. I push down on the blade and move a bit. I feel a rush of numbness and relief as it bleeds.

You should have seen this coming.

I cut again, and again, and again. No one really cares about you. Again. This is all your fault. Again. It's your fault wade killed himself! Again.

I feel numb. I try not to but I can't feel anything anymore. My entire arm is covered. But not my wrists, I was always scared I would cut a vien.

I throw out the blade and take out a new one. I put it to my wrist and all my pain melts away.

"I'm just worried about him. I mean he really loves wade." I say sitting next to cap and bucky.

"hey Friday, how is Peter doing?" Steve asks, looking at the ceiling. "he us unconscious, captain." She says.

"he has several wounds and appears to be bleeding intensely." The speaker says. My heart drops. Oh god.

I stand up to run to him but bucky puts his hand in the way. "let me do this. You two won't be able to handle seeing someone you care about hurt." He says, his voice low and anxious.

"tony, he's right. You can't handle seeing the kid if its what I think it is." Steve says, putting a hand on my shoulder. I sit back down on the couch.

"i'll be back." Bucky says, walking to peters room. After five minutes I can't stand it anymore. I get up and run to peters room before Steve can stop me.

I open the door and just see Peter laying in the bed, bandages on his wrists. The rest of his arms are covered in cuts. God

I walk in and see bucky in the bathroom, cleaning up blood. He stands up quickly when he sees me.

"just act like you never knew. Please, for peters sake." He says, staring at me.

"clint is already helping him try to quit. He can't just stop over night. But, I wasn't expecting this." He says, gesturing to Peter.

I nod and walk over to Peter I kiss his forehead and tuck him in. Poor kid, been through to much.

As I walk out bucky follows me and we see clint, nat, and Stephen in the living room talking to cap.

"babe. I need to talk to you about something." I say. Stephen turns around, I notice smal amounts of blood on his clothes.

He walks over to me we walk into the hall. He needs to know.

"Peter is cutting himself." I say, trying not to freak him out. To late. "he what? Why didn't he tell us? I would have gotten him a therapist." He says, looking horrified.

" calm down, he's ok. I just thought it would be important for me to tell you since I just found out. How is wade doing?" I ask, scared of the answer.

" He's going to be fine. But he will have to say in bed for a whiles. I say 3 days at the least." He say, shifting his weight from one side yo the other.

"What about after that? We can't let him go home." I say.

"clint looked through his phone and found someone named matt murdock. He's around 22 and lived as a foster child with the wilsons for a year when wade was younger. He said he would gladly take wade from ms.wilson." he says.

A/n sorry about all this. I turned into sort of a vent for a bit there. It's kind of important for the plot, kind of. Also in the note of mentioned Lewis. In this story wade had an older brother named Lewis who died in a crash with his dad. Anyway, have a good day / night / Alaska. -eden