merry christmas guys! i know it's not exactly christmas but i hope you all have a great holiday!

❥

Christmas Day, a day I've hated for years but sitting here after spending all morning opening presents I don't think I've experienced anything more festive and magical.

Ezra and Karen are here, they stayed over last night along side Joseph and Lucy - who joined us earlier this morning - but we all watched The Polar Express last night in front of the fire and Christmas tree.

I'm going to Issac's later to spend some time with them and a delicious dessert Issac has been looking forward to since Samatha mentioned she was baking it.

"This food smells incredible" Joseph licks his lips looking hungry for the meal mom has been preparing all day. It's the afternoon now, it's taken us a while to get through presents but moms really splashed out this year.

I didn't ask for anything, I didn't want anything - I just made a wish this year hoping that I'll be granted with guidance and a wish for everything to be okay, not just with me but with everything.

I've discovered that, with Louise's help that it's my mindset that's holding me back, I have good people around me it's just how I look at the world, I need to be more appreciative and try and push positivity into everything as best I can, even the small things. I also need to really focus on myself and what I want.

I'm so happy Issac got me that interview which I have after my holiday, not ideal but I had no idea I'd even be going to an interview but the people were really nice and understanding about it so I'll have my interview in the new year.

It's going to be amazing if I get that job, I definitely want to be a artist but not just drawings and paintings, I want to be an artist in everything I can. Art is my love and my passion, it feels me with fire and the sense of feeling alive and in control of what I'm doing. The sense of freedom to draw or create anything I want and no one can say no because it's my work.

I feel my phone make a little noise from my back pocket and check it, it's a message from Ellie wishing me a Merry Christmas, I smile and reply. She rang me last night to tell me she's officially/definitely telling her dad today, I'm not sure what my opinion is on the choice of timing but Ellie seemed really confident and happy about it I decided to let her do what makes her happy.

"Okay guy! Are you ready?" Mom shouts from the kitchen over the music, "Yes!" We all say at the same time when mom comes out with the biggest stacked plates I've ever seen.

Everything you could ever think of being on a Christmas meal is on this plate, I waste no time digging in. I hear a lot of moans from the table even some coming from me, "Mom, this is delicious!" I try to talk between mouth-fulls but I can't help but feel the urge to eat it all in one.

"I agree, this was 100% worth the wait" Ezra nods making everyone else nod as well. I haven't missed Ezra as much as I thought I would have. I mean he was my best friend at one point, the only person that was there for me and he still is but I don't need him as much now.

That sounds horrible and I do miss him but seeing him in his own house with Karen all happy fills my heart. I do especially miss him when our favourite programs come on but me and Romeo are always around his house anyways. "Guys whilst we all have you hear, me and Karen have some news" He says placing his cutlery down.

I almost don't hear him over the delicious food, "I don't know if this will come as a shock as I've been turning down glasses of bubbly, which was extremely hard, for orange juice" She looks around the table, the excitement plastered on her face, "But the other day I found out, we, found out that I'm pregnant!" The biggest smile erupts on her face.

Christ is it pregnancy season or something?! Am I next? I remove that one from my head very quickly, not a funny joke and, also very unrealistic since me and Issac haven't actually done it.

"Oh my Lord! I'm going to have a grand-baby!" My mom's entire body overcomes with excitement as she gets up to hug Karen in congratulations.

I'm going to be an auntie, Auntie Darcy, that's pretty cool, "Congratulations, I'm going to be an auntie!" I smile across the table, "I'm going to be an uncle" Joseph says like he's only just realised.

"Ahaha Uncle Joseph" I laugh, "Ahaha no" He cuts the fakest laugh, "We'll make that Uncle Joe, thank you very much Auntie Darcy" Now it's his time to laugh.

"Oh shhh!" I smack him playfully, "It's staying as Uncle Joseph, it has more of a ring" I put on my most innocent smile and a bat of my eyelids.

"I'm going to be Nanny Debra" My Mom has now seated herself again, still full of excitement, "I've always hated my name, Debra, what was your nan thinking" She shakes her head.

"How is nan?" Joseph asks sitting next to Lucy who is congratulating Karen, "She's good, still on her six month cruise" Mom waves her hand, trying not to sound jealous.

Mom was an only child so our family is very small, it's just us and nan, grandad sadly passed away before I was born and my dad's family I can't really remember, I can faintly remember grandad Arnold. I smile, he was always so lovely.

"She'll be back soon, won't she?" Ezra asks before placing a fork of food in his mouth, "Around the time we come back off holiday- talking of holiday, has everyone packed? We leave in two days" She warns us all, we all nod, "I've been packed since last week" I say with absolute no shame.

"Has Issac packed?" She sits opposite me on the table, "I think so, I'm not really sure he says he's packed but every time I go round there's only a pair of shorts thrown in there" I shake my head.

"He needs to get packed! We leave in two days!" Mom clearly can't stress this enough, "I know, I'll help him later" I smile.

"Good" She nods, "Your dad and everyone are all packed, I've had conformation, Adelaide is very excited" The sound of her name stings a little but I push it away.

After we all play a game of monopoly because I feel like that's a Christmas tradition to everyone, Ezra obviously won calling himself Mr Money Bags, show off, I reckon he was cheating.

Mom has rung everyone to tell she's going to be a grandmother, I wonder if I'll ever give mom more grandchildren. I want children but the future is such a crazy thing who knows what will happen? But I definitely want a kid.

"Could someone drop me off at Issac's?" I ask, I'm hoping someone will take me, it's freezing outside, this year we've had snow and Romeo loves it.

"Sure" Ezra gets to his feet, I stand up smiling excited to see Issac, I've changed into my Christmas dress to see him, I'm hoping he isn't being the grinch without wearing something festive.

I follow Ezra out the car with Romeo, strapping him in the back before strapping myself in the front. "We haven't spoke in a while, how you been?" He looks over at me but not for to long.

By talk he means talk, one of our most famous chats about what I'm feeling, "Good, it was bad and I'm not saying it's all good but I'm definitely feeling good at the moment" I nod, believing every word I say - because for a change it's all completely true.

"I'm glad, you've seemed different lately" He keeps his eyes on the road, the lanes are completely dead, no traffic in sight.

"Different good or bad?" I look at the snow falling from the sky, "Good, you've always been so cagey and I think being at college has helped you" He smiles a warm smile.

"And Issac. I think he's really helped you, I didn't trust him at first but he proved me wrong" The smile lingers on his freckled face.

"I'm sorry if I was harsh towards you and Karen and made you feel like you couldn't tell me. I didn't realise how much I effected your life" I frown, I feel like I don't truly know Ezra because he's had to hide things from me.

"Don't ever apologise to me Darcy, being there for you and being able to help you was a blessing in many ways, it was an experience of growth and it still is, we helped each other unknowingly" We pull up at Issac's.

"Thank you for always being there for me" I smile over at him, "I love you, be safe driving home" I reach other and hug him.

I get out the car unstrapping Romeo and up the snow covered drive, the door swings open, "Merry Christmas!" Amelia beams, "Merry Christmas" I cheer, giving her a hug.

We head inside, Ro has already let himself in. I smile instantly when I see Samantha and John, "Darcy's here!" Sam runs over to me, wrapping me in a hug.

"I've got you a present" She smiles mysteriously, "What? No you didn't have to" I widen my eyes in surprise.

"Open it" She hands me a biggish sized present, I place it on the table and begin unwrapping, "Oh wow!" A smile so big spreads on my face when I see the massive, fluffiest, blanket I've even seen. "Is this the one from the magazine?" I ask, hugging it to my chest.

"It sure is" She smiles, I had once pointed this very blanket out in one of the shopping magazines Sam gets monthly, "Thank you so much!" I hug her feeling overcome.

John and an elderly woman walk through, "We hear happy voices in here" John smiles, "Darcy! Merry Christmas darling" He hugs me.

"Merry Christmas" I smile up at him, I adore Issac's parents, "This is my mom, Alice but obviously you can call her Nanny Alice" He winks.

"Hi Nanny Alice" I smile, she has the bonniest smile I've ever seen, "Hello Darcy, oh my, aren't you a vision" She takes my hand squeezing it, "Issac did tell me so" She smiles.

"Naann" Issac walks in a shade of red, I laugh, "Oh stop, he never stops talking about you" She winks, "Naaaaannn!" Issac whines making Alice laugh.

"I can remember being young and in love" She squeezes his cheeks. "Who wants to watch a Christmas movie?" Sam smiles from the breakfast bar.

We all file into the living room excited, I take my blanket which fits across me, Issac and John as we sit next to each other on the sofa, me in the middle.

We watch Home Alone and then Elf whilst munching on mince pies that Samantha has made.

"Mom is it ready yet?" Issac whines, "I'll go check" They're talking about the desert Samantha has made. "I've your presents" I dig around my bag to give him another bag with presents in.

"Oooo" He pulls out a squishy one, it's a hoodie he's been wanting forever, "You got me the Tommy Hilfiger hoodie I wanted?" He looks shocked as he stares at it, I can just about see Romeo's head poking up from his lap under the blanket. "You kept banging on about how badly you wanted it so I decided to get it you" I laugh, stroking Ro's soft little head.

He pulls out the next gift, "Darcy what? You've spoilt me" He looks at the trainers, which he's also been banging on about, truthfully it's been doing my head in so I'm thankful that he has them now so he'll shut up about them, "No I haven't!" I smile at him.

The next present is some perfume even though he prefers to call it aftershave, "Thank you" He hugs me, kissing my forehead, "I love you" He whispers for my ears only, "I love you too" I whisper back.

He passed me my presents, I laugh when I open the first one, "The first season of Desperate Housewives?" I raise my eyebrow.

"Yes, it was the first ever season we watched together" He smiles, showing me his teeth. I open some Harry Potter related items which includes my house scarf and Draco's wand.

I then open a new handbag which admittedly I had been banging on about myself, and a necklace that has a pendant in the middle, "What's this?" I carefully pick it up.

"A necklace, here, shine a light on it" He hands me the flash light on his phone and I flash it on what I'm guessing he means the pendant.

I become unable to speak when I see what the light shows, "It says I love you in a hundred languages because one just isn't enough to explain how much I love you" He mumbles in my ear, "Oh Issac" I breath, feeling my heart beat in my chest.

"This is the most thoughtful- beautiful present I've ever received" I continue to look at it, "I'm glad you like it" He smiles, he gently takes it out of my hands and clips it around my neck.

"Thank you, I truly don't deserve you" I lean over connecting our lips, "No, I don't deserve you" He whispers against me.

❥

i know this is a small chapter! but admittedly i have the case of writers block and i've been desperately trying to write something good because i want to do my best for all of you! i've re-wrote this chapter once that's why it's so short because i started it on wednesday night, i'm sorry ):

thank you for 50k reads! that's truly amazing thank you!

i'm still editing chapters so bare with i'm getting them done as fast as i can! (:

vote if you like!