"OK, Ili," Dad picks me up as though I were the most fragile piece of glass. "Looks like he's already here-"

"Was she given anything?" Sean's voice cuts through the air.

"Yes," Dad bites out. "Clearly it's not enough."

I turn in Dad's arms and vomit. My eyes are blind, all I can see is darkness, but my hearing works. "Shh, just a second more, Ili."

Once again, I'm placed into a tub of icy water. I start to sob. "I've been cold for so long," I gasp out. I want to laugh and scream and cry at the irony. I'm so hot, hotter than I've ever been before, and it's terrible.

"I fucking hate you," I hear Dad seethe from somewhere else in the room.

"I won't hurt Ili. Never again," Sean says quietly. "This isn't a normal heat."

"I called Doc for something stronger to help her, but he said to get a male in here with her. That's the only reason why I called you, get it?"

"Why wouldn't drugs help her more?" Sean says desperately.

"Because, you fuck, her wolf is calling out to yours. Probably screaming, and her body is too frail to be knocked out while her wolf is raging inside her."

"Oh," I murmur. Someone is pouring the cold water over my head, stroking my hair. I pretend it's Dad, but I know it's Sean. It feels right. "Sick," I whisper.

I'm turned and a bucket is shoved under my nose. All that's left in my stomach is puke-yellow bile. "Puke-yellow," I mutter. My eyes are still hazy, but the world is slowly righting itself a little.

"Yeah, babydaisy, you like?" Sean croons. His forced amusement can't hide the deep worry in his voice. "I can get you a blanket in this same yellow."

"Don't talk to her," Dad snaps. "Just help."

"Gerald," Sean says calmly, "I need to get us naked and soothe her like her mate should. Talking helps. She's already in less pain."

I hate that he's right. His voice and touch feel absolutely wonderful. My mind trips over all the information we're taught about rejection and our wolves. If my she-wolf was truly done with Sean and his wolf, then he wouldn't be able to help me now. Beta Rique was just beginning to talk about mates and the connections formed between them from the earliest stages of shifting to the full Claim. "I'm missing class with the Sex god!" I whine.

The room goes quiet. Dad clears his throat. "Well, Beta Rique may offer some catch-up lessons."

Sean's jealous growl makes me snicker. He relaxes with a soft chuckle. "Feel better?" he asks me. I crack open one eyelid. Dark brown eyes stare at me with concern.

"Ili," Dad crouches down at the end of the tub. "I have to go." He looks panicked.

"Now?" I whine. Ugh. I hate whiners.

His smile is tight. I notice that his cell phone is clutched so tightly in his hand that his knuckles look white, but my eyes are still not working the best, so I may be wrong.

Sean's phone is pinging, but he silences it with a significant glance toward Dad. "I won't leave her," he tells Dad seriously.

Dad nods, face pale. Worry starts to churn. Did something happen to Phoebe or Mom? Before I can ask, Sean stands up and strips down to his boxer briefs. I know my she-wolf is a hoe when she stares at his body like a starving wolf at a buffet.

Sean slides into the tub behind me and pulls my back to his front. Immediately I feel utterly boneless. The pain is manageable, only the slightest twinges telling me that my heat cycle isn't over.

"This isn't so bad," I murmur. "I can handle this."

Dad kisses my forehead and whispers, "I'll be back, sweetie. Just hang tight, OK?"

"'Kay," I murmur.

Sean keeps quiet as the doors shut. We rest in the tub together until he stands a bit abruptly. "Shit," he mutters as he climbs out, making sure I'm resting back against the tub before he leaves.

Is the bathwater warm, or is my heat returning? "Sean?" I cry out, a little panicked.

"Shh, babydaisy. Hang on." Ice is poured into the tub. It starts to melt almost right away. I stare at the cubes, shuddering. I bite back the pitiful sounds that I want to make, staring with bloodshot eyes at Sean as he secures the cabin's doors and windows, locking them securely. I take a moment to look around, taking in the small, one-room cabin in a glance. A small kitchenette without a cooktop or stove, just a microwave, toaster, and a huge fridge. They don't want anyone to burn down the cabin and during heat, there are too many distractions. For that same reason, there is no tv, but there is a huge, king-size bed that dominates the bedroom.

A bang against the walls outside makes me shriek. Something moves against the window, like a horror movie in the middle of the afternoon. Sean winds a handle, closing a massive steel shutter across the window. The sound goes quiet. He moves to the other window and does the same thing.

It's like being entombed. "Open the windows!" I shout at him.

Sean returns to me and scoops up a handful of water, pouring it over my neck. "Sweet-" he cuts humself off, "babylove, I can't open the shutters, yet, OK?"

It hits me that those are males outside, attacking the cabin. I shudder again. "Why is my heat so strong?" I whimper.

"I don't know," Sean says grimly "Ili-baby, let's discuss this before your heat gets worse, ok?"

I swallow back the tinge of vomit, lust curling through me at the sound of his voice. "No," I gasp at him. "Just drug me, Sean! Knock me the hell out."

"No more drugs, babylove. The heat dose would be too high for you and obviously, the lower dose isn't working. You're a strong female, daisy, drugs can't stop this."

He's such a liar. I heard what Dad told him. I can't take the pain of the heat because I'm too weak. "I can take some pain!" I snarl at him, in direct contradiction to the truth. My anger flares up inside me. How dare he assume what is best for me?! Ever since that damn Mating Ceremony, he has been on my ass like an unwelcome rash. He's even elbowing his way into my inner circle and I hate it. All I can think is that it's too little, too late.

Sean doesn't answer my outburst, just looks at me calmly. "Babydaisy, I want this to go as smoothly as possible, so..." he takes a deep breath, "I'll wear a cup and a muzzle. I may have to tie you down so you can't undo them. Never go submissive to me, got it?"

"Never," I growl, but I don't really know what he's saying. I'm still a virgin, for goddess' sake. I get the muzzle and the submissive part, but what's a cup? Normally this entire conversation would make me blush bright red, but I feel so hot, so disoriented. Sean is starting to blur. His form wavering in my sight as my mouth waters and my fingers twitch from wanting him.

"Good," he says, softly, with a shudder of desire of his own, "I don't want to Mark you without your permission, so keep your distance. If you go on hands and knees..." another deep breath, "shit, I'll Claim you, Ili, even through a fucking muzzle."

"Keep it distant," I breathe. I lick my lips. I feel so hot and dry. "OK, Sean." He swallows and stands up as I sway closer to him. "Mmm, Sean," I moan. I am so freakin' hot. I sink into the tub, trying to gain some relief from the unrelenting heat, but the water is warm again. "Hot," I whine softly. A ripple of pain runs through me. I arch my back, begging for him to touch me again.

Sean slams his eyes shut, leaning over the tub with his hands fisted on the top rim, head bowed. "Stop, Ili. It's early still, babydaisy. I won't be able to-"

The feeling rising in me is different. I think this may be the lust stage of heat. I shut him up with one hand over his mouth and the other down his wet boxer-briefs. "Now," I command him. Holy shit, is he big all over. A thrill runs through me. My she-wolf is finally calm, our ideas lining up. Mount the male.

"Fuck my life," he growls. His hips surge forward, thrusting instinctively into my palm. "Ili, shit." He grabs me, picking me up as I wrap around him like a boa constrictor. I toss my head back, moaning loud and low when I finally get some relief, rubbing my aching core on his hip. "OK, cup," Sean mutters, "shit, babylove, yeah, keep rubbing your pussy on me, daisy," he keeps talking in a low voice as he carries me to the bed. I am barely aware of his slight withdrawal, his motions as he pulls something on.

He grabs my waist again and something smooth rubs against my panties. "It hurts!" I snarl. The wet material itches my overly-sensitive skin something awful. "Stupid undies!"

They're ripped away, and that smooth coolness is back. I look down and see the 'cup.' It looks like a jockstrap, containing Sean's male bits entirely, with room to grow. Made of soft leather, the strap encircles his waist and his thighs, locking in the back. It's loose. Sean can only tighten two of the straps himself.

"Baby, tighten it in- fuck!" I ignore him, pressing my hot core to the leather and rolling my hips. I snarl angrily. It's not enough. Growling, I jerk and wiggle while the male above me pants and growls, fumbling with something before giving up. Something enters me, sending shards of soothing warmth to cool down the insane lust. I hear him softly encourage me. "Good girl, ride my fingers, Ili. Take what you want."

I scream as the orgasm crashes over me. Every fiber of my being is focused, my wolf too, our combined attention on the male with us, on getting him to fuck us hard and fast.

Heat rises. I hate heat. I want the pain to stop. "No, daisy, please, baby let me-" I shut out his words. Stupid male. Climbing into his lap, I knock away his hand and push him onto his back. "Ok, baby. Stop!"

I snarl wickedly, snapping my jaws in his face. He mumbles something about how beautiful I am, but I ignore that, too. I shift my hips, riding him, knocking away his hand when he tries to soothe my ache. Stupid male! He lets out a choked laugh, his eyes lighting up with a ferocity that my she-wolf matches.

My hips inch higher and the male goes still. Something prods my opening, something large and thick. It's much larger than his finger. It doesn't fit at first, but I need it and want it and I aim to have it. I wriggle and feel my body stretch to accommodate the thick head of the male. It fits. The slight twinge of discomfort is eclipsed by the sheer joy as I sink down.

"Holy fuck. Fuck me. I can't believe- goddess, Ili-" I smack his chest to get him to shut up. With another choked laugh he does. He gently rolls his hips upward, so I smack him again.

"No," I snap. Closing my eyes, I start to rock back and forth. That feeling is welling up again. I hold my breath, letting it climb. My hips move faster as the body under me gets tighter and harder and hotter. I curl my fingers into his stomach, the hard muscle bunching and rolling under me. The wet sounds of sex fill the air and I breathe it in, savoring the power I have over the strong male below me.

He knocks me off. Tosses me to the bed without letting me get what I need. I growl, furious, nearly murderous. Pain scorches my insides. My she-wolf snarls and for a moment we contemplate throwing open the door to let those unknown males outside service us.

Sean opens the bedside table and grabs a box. Condoms. At least a hundred. Ribbed, extra-large sized. He looks at me, panting, sweating, desperate. "Ili, are you sure you want me back in you?"

I snarl, turning over to part my thighs silently. He moans, his eyes fixed to the sight between my legs. Condoms in brightly-colored wrappers scatter to the floor and all over the bed. He snags one and rolls it down while I watch, licking my lips. The first one tears and he swears foully before grabbing another. This one works, and he crawls back to me and gently pushes back inside without asking any more stupid questions.

I score his skin. My wolf demands his blood. We don't want his Mark, but we want to mark him up. Let all the other bitches know who had him last. My wolf is panting, taunting his wolf with the knowledge that we won't bear his Mark. This is about she and I and the relief we are wringing from Sean's body.

Sensation swamps me, sending my mind far, far away. All I know is the feeling of his cock shuttling in and out, his fingers tugging at my hips, my thighs, my breasts. I break, my orgasm washing over me, but the male doesn't withdraw, his body holds still deep inside me, his low laugh and encouraging rumble soothing me until the heat rises again in a huge swell. In tune with my needs, the male starts to stroke again.

I come to only to find a panting, crazed-looking Sean straddling me. "Don't Mark her," he mumbles to himself. His words are slurred through the protruding canines dripping with saliva. His face is feral, wild. He's pulled off the condom with shaking fingers and some of the cum is dripping out onto my belly. His dazed eyes follow the droplets of white. He licks his lips, stroking his cock only inches from my entrance. White smears his cock, his hand, as he ties off the used condom and tosses it to the side. The acrid scent of mating venom fills the air between us.

I cut off my own scared whine. The haze has left enough for me to realize just how dangerous my position is. I have to calm him down, to snap him out of the mating frenzy he's in.

"Beta?" I whisper softly. His eyes snap to mine. I flinch from the burning lust I see there. "You're scaring me," I admit.

He practically flies off of me. One second he's on me, nude and trembling, with the cup dangling uselessly from his left hip, the next he's at a set of drawers across the room, opening the topmost one so hard that he wrenches it from the frame.

"Where is it?" he pants to himself. I keep silent, not wanting to draw his attention back to me. He rips open the next, then the next, becoming more frantic to find whatever "it" is.

"Thank the goddess," he practically cries with relief. Without turning my way he lifts the object to his face. When he turns around I can't stop my gasp of dismay.

He's found the muzzle. The inch-wide leather strap rests directly over his half-open mouth and wraps around his head. His eyes hold mine, a plea in his. He walks back over and hovers over me. A muffled, "please" is all he says before he bows his head, presenting the buckle to me.

"Sean," I breathe. I can't do this to him. A muzzle is such a cruel device for wolves. We aren't dogs. We aren't out-of-control monsters, but I guess... he sort of is right now. Sean growls, low, a promise from his wolf. His most basic instinct is to Mark me.

"I'm not a virgin anymore," I whisper. With shaking fingers reach up and pull the strap tight, latching it together. I hate this. I hate myself. This is awful, but I can feel the heat rising in my belly. My loins are heavy for him, for my erstwhile mate. I don't know how often he made my orgasm or how much time passed. With the shutters over the windows, I don't even know what time of day it is. I just know that we are too close to never going back. I lost my virginity in a heat haze to the male who nearly killed me.

I betrayed Braxton and the worst part is, the rising heat in my body means it's not over.

---

I hurtle over the ground, Orion, for once, on my heels. Something is wrong. An abyss is looming, my paws skating the edge. I don't know what it is, but I was woken out of a sound sleep this morning with the sensation of falling into the gloom.

Orion snarls and finally tackles me. Sides heaving, I lay on the ground and gasp pathetically for air.

Orion shifts back to feet and sinks to his knees next to me. "I don't-" he sucks in air desperately, "-know what the fuck" gasp, "is wrong, but," he inhales again, "-you're going to kill yourself here."

I don't bother to shift back to feet. I can't explain what is wrong, anyway and I don't want to waste time and precious energy trying to explain myself. I'm still nearly a day from home. A day, if I don't collapse or have a heart attack on the way.

My wolf growls low, his insane eyes staring blindly into the dirt as he sucks in air. Coughing, we rise to stand, head hanging low as we steady our breathing.

"Ready?" Orion says after another minute.

I shake my shaggy head and Orion shifts back to paws. We race south, towards home, towards Ili.