❁We understand death only after it has placed its hand on someone we love. ❁

" What did you do to her? You said she'd be safe with you, didn't you? " Josie Taylor crashes into the hospital corridor and grabs my collar. Her blood is literally fuming and the wrath is simply reflecting on her face.

My jaw clenches, I can't hear a single word she says. I can't feel her grabbing my collar. All I think of, is Noriana, inside the operation theatre.

I stand there like a dead body. I can't get the scene, where Noriana was screaming and groaning in pain, out of my head. She was hurting, I knew it, I was right beside her, yet I couldn't help her.

Oh Jesus, what did I do? I should have never taken her to Manchester.

My heart skips a beat when the door of OT opens, and the doctor walks out, " Nora Williamson? "

" Yes. " Liam, Josie and I say in unison.

" I'm not going to sugarcoat it. Her condition is critical. The tumor is exerting extreme pressure on medulla oblongata. We're preparing her for the operation. " the doctor tells, and looks over at the couple beside me, " Dr. Harrington, right? "

" Yes. " Liam nods and gestures towards Josie, " And this is Dr. Josie Taylor. "

" Can you both please come to my cabin. " the doctor says.

" Sure. "

" The acoustic neuroma needs to be removed from her cranial nerves that is causing the..." The doctor apprises as Liam and Josie follow him to the cabin, whereas I keep standing like a clown. I try to eavesdrop but their conversation is inaudible to me.

A few minutes later, while Liam is still inside the cabin, Josie steps out. She immediately grabs the first seat she could see, and sits down holding her head.

" Hey, what do they say? " I ask as I walk over to her. Bending down on my knees. She doesn't reply. Instead, covers her face and sobs. " Hey, Josie, don't do this. Please tell me what did they say or I'll die. "

She looks down at me, through her red eyes, " You don't need to. It wasn't your fault. You're clean. Now go ahead. Celebrate your victory. "

" What do you mean? " I ask, not being able to understand her.

" It was her destiny to be here. There's a tumor in her head. If not today, then tomorrow. It had to happen. " she weeps.

Ridiculous. I don't believe in destiny. I don't believe that some stupid tumor can take Noriana away from me.

" There must be a way, right? There has to be. " I gasp.

" No. Tumor is already on the advanced stage. There's no way she could... " she stands up. Covering her mouth with her palm, she walks away. And Liam who, I don't know when came out of the room, follows her.

Bullshit. Impossible.

There has to be a way.

This can't be it.

I bring out my phone from my pocket, to make some calls. I will get her world's best neuro surgeon.

I will keep my promise. She will live.

Bloody hell. Why is here no network? I rush outside in search for network. Just as I walk out of the building, I find Josie Taylor and Liam Harrington chattering.

" I think you should tell him. He could actually help. " says Liam.

I know he's talking about me.

" You think it's my choice to do the otherwise? " grunts Josie.

What is that they're hiding?

" No promise is more important than someone's life. " Liam tries to convince her.

" What promise? Is there a way to save her? " I ask from behind. They both turn to me with their eyes widened. " Your silence is killing me. I asked something! " I thunder.

" No. " Josie lies.

" Yes, she could be saved. " Liam tells, and Josie looks at him in shock and disagreement. He continues anyway, " Very low, but there are chances. It'll be a major craniotomy. " he takes a pause and then continues, " That can cost hundreds of thousands of dollar. "

" So? " I raise a brow.

Wait. The only heir of Williamson empire is fighting between life and death because of some bloody pennies?

What a joke!

Besides, she's my wife. If I have to sell all the shares of Anderson Enterprises, fuck those shares.

" I want America's Best neuro surgeon to operate her. " I declare.

" We can't afford that. " Josie mumbles, angry and at the same time sad.

" Are you out of your mind? Do you even know who she is? She's the only heir of England's richest businessman. The true heir of Williamson empire. You're telling me of hundreds of thousands of dollars? She could literally buy this whole hospital and every single person you see around, in a heartbeat! " I spit out.

They both look at me like I said something they never knew.

Jesus, I can't believe this girl. She refused to have the operation because of some money.

Am I the one who broke her to this edge? That she accepted her end.

Josie stands there staring at me. Can't tell if she's internally crusing me or thanking me. While Liam gives a pat on my shoulder in an assuring and sympathizing way, and then immediately walks inside the hospital to have a talk with the doctors, I suppose.

All this time, I might have never showed it, but I have always admired Josie Taylor for being so protective of Noriana. For being a great friend to her. She had her back when she was in a stranger country.

Even though she was rude that night when I asked to take Noriana with me, to Manchester. I still held her in high regards because I knew, that no matter what she would never leave Noriana alone, the way I did.

But today, I feel so disappointed in her. How could she give up on Noriana like that? How could she believe that she wouldn't make it? How could she?

" I expected better from you. " I throw a deceived look at Josie. I can no longer stand her. So I turn around to step away. I can't believe Noriana thinks of her as her soul-sister.

Sisters don't give up.

" She took a promise from me. " Josie says from behind, and I stop on my tracks. " She had said that no matter what, if one day her ex-husband comes out of the blue and asks to help her or pay for her treatment or any such. Do not let him. She had made me promise it to her, as her last wish."

A warm drop of tear escapes from my eye and falls on the ground. She hated me this much? She'd rather die than take my money.

Not turning around, I walk away.

***

It's been eight hours and the surgery is still going on. No update on her condition. Feels like the time has stopped. Every second is passing as though an hour. I'm scared. One moment I tell myself that she'll be fine and on the other, my body shivers thinking what if anything goes wrong.

Almost three years ago, when she left Manchester, I accepted that she must have died. She was dead to me. I learned to live without her. I became a heartless person. I felt no emotion.

Then she came back. I tried everything I could to retaliate for every tear I cried because of her. But God knows how she made me feel things, again. She gave me my emotions back.

I felt joyous when she was around. Guilty, when I made her sad. Peace, when I saw her happy. Sorrow, when I heard how much she hated me.

Fear, that I'm feeling right now.

I no longer contain the power to turn myself back into the Hans that took birth three years ago. I want to feel things. I want her to make me feel things. I want her to be my emotion.

What the bloody hell the doctors are even doing inside the operation theater from past nine hours?

I can't take it anymore. I can blast any moment now.

Standing up from my seat, I make my way to downstairs. As I reach for the lift, I think of Noriana. How she never takes lifts, thinking what if they stop midway.

My Silly Nerd.

Choosing the stairs, I go to the cars parking, and sit inside my car. Rolling the windows up, I scream. With all the strength and voice in my throat.

Holding my head, I let myself cry into a breakdown. I throw my hand on the steering wheel multiple times. Then bite my fist through my teeth. Thinking, hurting myself will probably help my aching heart.

It doesn't.

With imprints of my digged nails on my hands, I punch my head and bite my lower lip. Nothing freaking works. What do I do to take all of her pain? She doesn't deserve to be there.

That is not her place to be.

Her place is beside her bookshelf, doing what she loves the most. Reading. Writing. Making random fantasies.

Not on that Operation theatre's bed.

I open my eyes after a long anxiety filled, self cursing, freaking out, praying session. I realise the sun is about to set.

What the fuck am I even doing here? I should be with Noriana. I take a long sigh and gulp my own saliva. Wipe my wet face, step out of my car and move towards the Neuro ward building of the hospital.

Before I could set my foot on the floor, I see Josie Taylor at a distance. Big heavy tears rolling down her cheeks. Seeing her like this makes me anxious more than I ever was. With my heartbeat on its peak, I ask, " Is everything alright? "

Running, she crosses the distance. Not carrying a drill machine this time, though. She hugs me, tightly.

My body flinches, and I choke on my breath. Only if there had been a scale to measure my anxiety, " Is everything alright, Josie? " I gasp.

" No. " she replies, crying on my shoulder.

No. This can't happen.

She can't. She can't leave me.

Not again.

I can't handle that.

No!

If she's going. I'm going too.

❤❤❤

Hey, everyone.

❁ I did not edit this chapter. It was already hard enough for me to write. Because of so many personal reasons. Mine and Hans' state is disturbingly close. I pray to God that none of us have to lose the ones we love.

❁ Ah, anyways, last year today, I published Little More Love's first chapter. 25 Sept.

❁ Let's see what the future holds for Hans and me both.