I was wrapped in kuroos sheets, 10 minutes already passing. my AirPods were in and my breathing got heavier as random thoughts raced through my head.

"y/n!" Remy yelled, barging into the room, making me jump.

"y-yeah?" I stuttered, trying to move out of the blankets.

"kuroo and kenma are going at it! what happened!" she ripped the blanket off me with her eyes wide and scared. my eyes widened before I ran up and out the door.

I made it outside the dorm seeing blood droplets on the floor alongside kuroo and kenma. kenma had a bruised eye and a bleeding nose whilst kuroo had a busted lip, scratch marks all over his face and body and a bruised, bleeding nose.

"WHY WOULD YOU KISS HER? YOU KNEW I LOVED HER SO WHAT THE FUCK IS YOUR PROBLEM?" kenma yelled, trying to punch him in the stomach

"YOU DIDNT LOVE HER FOR SHIT! NOT ONLY DID SHE ALMOST DIE BUT ONLY A COUPLE DAYS LATER, YOU WENT TO GO TELL SOME OTHER GIRL THAT YOU WERE SINGLE. WHOS IN THE WRONG HERE BECAUSE ITS NOT FUCKING ME" he yelled back, grabbing the boy's shirt before throwing him to the floor.

I ran up to the two, grabbing hold of kenmas shirt before he tried to get up. I pulled him back, sending kuroo a glare to which he froze, looking at his bleeding knuckles.

"dont touch kuroo again, leave!" Remy yelled from the dorm whilst kenma looked down at the floor, his eyes turning glossy and his nose starting to ache.

my hands were trembling. I didn't know what to say or do, I just clung to his shirt.

why was this happening? why now? why here of all places? and why...them? I felt sick to my stomach, the feeling of my lungs squeezing together making my breath heave.

my legs felt like jelly and my head was spinning.

my knees slowly buckled as I sunk to the floor, letting go of kenmas shirt.

"you're ruining me... every time I finally get a hold of you, you leave. right when everything starts to go good, you leave. every time I finally understand you, you leave. your impossible." I muttered, tears rolling down my face and onto the floor. I didn't want this, I didn't want anyone to get hurt.

I felt everyone's eyes on Me, the pity stares, the judgemental stares...everything.

"i-"

"who threw the first punch?" I cut kenma off, standing up slowly before wiping the tears that fell from my eyes.

"...me..." he muttered, clenching his fists before turning away from my gaze.

I looked over at kuroo who looked shocked like he was scared of himself. his hands were shaking and lips were quivering.

"why'd you hurt each other?"

the both of them looked up at me, guilty looks spread on their faces as they avert their eyes to look at each other.

"because...he kissed you" kenma muttered, looking down at the ground realising how stupid he sounded.

we love a self-aware king😍

"so should I go curb stomp that roommate of yours? kenma, think before you do shit that you'll regret later. not only did you hurt your best friend but you caused a scene... you don't want me, I'm fine with that I guess just don't take it out on kuroo..."

I explained, my brows furrowing together as a headache started to form.

"I don't like her...I don't like Sakura, she's obnoxious, and mean and she's a player... I was just used to calling myself single so I didn't...realise I said what I said."

"But you didn't even try to justify yourself or explain the situation, you just went along with it."

"because you wouldn't have believed me. I've put you through too much and I don't expect you to forgive me over and over again..." he explained, wiping the blood dripping from his nose as tears rolled down his cheek.

Remy had dragged kuroo inside to get him cleaned up whilst you and kenma stayed outside.

"what made you think I wouldn't believe you?"

"Because I'm a fuck up. I'm constantly getting myself into trouble with you so I thought you finally had enough of me..." he spoke softly, digging his nails into his palm.

"...you really are a dumbass huh?"

he looked up at me, his brows furrowed and eyes wet.

"why'd you have to kiss him..." he muttered out, the tears he held back finally falling.

"It just kinda happened."

"do you regret it?"

"regret what"

"kissing kuroo?"

"no, because if I didn't, you wouldn't have told me about what happened until it was too late," I explained, looking at his cat eyes look up into mine.

"and if you didn't come into the room, who knows what could've happened. I probably would've slept with him"

"Why are you saying that?"

"is it hurting your feelings?"

"kind of not gonna lie to you."

"Now you know how it feels to be fucked with. I love you kenma but you have to get yourself sorted before we get together"

I stated, walking back to kuroos dorm to check on him.

I didn't know why I was torturing myself like this, why I kept giving out chances left and right but I couldn't help it, maybe they will change, maybe they will be better.

I walked into the dorm, a dead-like look on my face as a sudden wave of guilt hit me.

did I sound mean saying that? does he even want to be with me again? why did I assume that? IS MY EGO REALLY THAT BIG? FOR FUCK SAKESSSS

"Y/n? are you okay?" kuroos voice snapped me out of my thoughts as I looked up at his puffy-eyed figure.

"I'm fine. come" I sighed, motioning the boy over.

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have kissed you. I've caused a lo-"

"I'm the one that kissed you. I dont know what came over me, you were just right there and I wanted you, I wanted you to be happy, to feel safe again...but I betrayed, hurt and caused a scene for both you and kenma." he sniffled, his eyes going glossy and his lips quivering.

I pulled the boy into a hug, his body instantly sinking to the ground as he hugged me back, sobbing into my stomach and gripping onto my dress.

"I hurt my best friend, I should've just let him take his anger out on me, I deserved it..." he cried out, my eyes starting to water as I looked at his shaking body grip onto me like I was the only thing he had left.

I ducked down and leaned up against the door, holding him in my embrace just letting him let all his emotions out.

"what do I do, do I apologize to him? do I tell him that I'm sorry? did he really deserve to get punched?" he sobbed out, nuzzling his head Into my chest with his hands wrapped around my waist.

"don't feel guilty about it, he threw the first punch..." I muttered, rubbing his back softly.

I saw Remy walk Into the room, looking at the sobbing kuroo that was curled up in my lap. I waved her over before she sat down next to him, laying her head on his shoulder.

"don't cry kuroo, it'll all blow over. things will go back to how they should be..." she spoke softly, drawing circles on his back as his sobbing started to quiet down, his breathing reverting to normal.

"y/n" he choked out, his head still buried into my chest.

"hmm?"

"I like you... I always have. ever since we met, I thought you were cute... I feel fucking terrible for feeling like that." he sobbed out.

Remy looked at me with a knowing face, rubbing his back before getting up to get some water.

"I guess I'm pretty popular with the boys then" I giggled, slumping my head back on the door.

what the hell was happening?

why now?

why does this all pour out now?

this doesn't make sense.

kuroo moved around to get comfortable, his head laid in my lap, a hand on his side with the other on the floor.

"I'm sorry" he spoke with a sigh, his eyes closing with his breathing getting steadier.

"don't be, you tried your best" I sighed, looking up at the roof whilst caressing his cheek with my thumb.

I felt his hand touch mine, taking it off his cheek as he held it close to him, his forehead pressing against it making me smile a bit.

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