《Secondhand Memories (Pioneer English Cell Phone Novel)》Beneath It All
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Chapter 307
Beneath It All
"Seiji-kun..."
"Ne, Seiji-kun!"
I opened my eyes and found her face barely inches from mine.
"Ohayou.."
I pulled back and sat up.
"Ah, are you feeling alright?"
She nodded but kept her gaze on the floor.
I was suddenly mesmerized by her quiet girlish charms.
"Thanks for staying with me all night."
I shook my tired mind free before turning to look at her.
"I thought you would've left for sure." She continued.
I gave her a polite smile.
"I'll get you some warm water."
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"Thanks." Was what she said when I came back with the water.
"I don't know where I'd be if it weren't for you."
"Don't mention it. It's the least I could do for a friend right?"
She smiled.
There was silence between us as she sipped from her glass.
Then, "Airu."
"Hmm?"
I hesitated.
"What are your parents like?"
"What?"
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She looked at me, confused.
"What?" She repeated her question.
"What you said last night...
gave me the impression your parents aren't around much, that's all."
"I did?"
"Ah."
"Oh." She looked sullenly at the floor.
"It's okay if you don't want to talk about it." I added.
"Nah, it's fine." She said after a moment of hesitation.
"You're the only person I would tell."
"I trust you."
I tried to say something but I didn't know what to make of the comment.
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"It's a long... story..." She said, drawing out the pauses for emphasis.
She fidgeted. "You sure you want to hear about it?"
I grinned. "I've got time."
There was nothing to do now that I decided I was skipping out on school today.
She was sitting cross-legged on her futon in front of me now.
Her finger tips played along the edge of her down comforter every once in a while.
"Well..." She mumbled.
Then she sighed and launched into her tale,
as if she had well rehearsed it for the day when someone asked.
"I had a sister." She said.
"Had?"
"Mm."
"She died from a bus crash when I was twelve."
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I caught my breath.
"Kaoru.. she was everything I yearned to be."
"She was beautiful. With confidence in every one of her steps. And she was graceful too."
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She sighed, as if she could see her in her mind.
"She was only 2 years older than me but so much more mature and cultured."
"She never fought with our parents and always let her little sister have her way with everything."
She paused, trying hard to recall.
"Kaoru was smart; top grades in school. She played sports too and was on the basketball team."
She shook her head, letting her bangs cascade down one side of her face.
"I could never catch up to her. She was our family's pride and trophy. I was just a spectator cheering her on."
"She was my parent's hopes and dream. That's the way it was meant to be."
Tears began to well up but she bit her lip and held them back.
"I wasn't smart enough. I wasn't pretty enough. I wasn't sporty enough."
"All I could do was sing and draw -- things that my parents thought were a waste of time."
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"When she died -" She choked on her words. "-you can guess how devastating it was for us."
"I hated her for leaving me."
"After that, my parents almost refused to talk to me for half a year. They didn't even look at me."
I remained silent. There was nothing I could say.
She continued, "I was sort of okay being in her shadow. Maybe that's just how it was meant to be."
"I knew I couldn't do the things she could. But she just dumped all the responsibility on me."
She swallowed painfully. "Then all of a sudden, like they snapped, my parents told me to get my act together."
"I was forced to act in the place of my sister. I had to be pretty. I had to be confident. I had to be smart."
"Still, I wanted to please my parents. It didn't really matter to me."
"But in my heart, I knew I couldn't do it." She stopped.
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She sighed. "I had to do something I couldn't and my parents were blaming me for it."
"My marks weren't high enough in school so they got me a tutor and forced me to homeschool to get into a prestigious university in the future."
"Other than telling me to work harder they usually don't talk about anything else."
"That's how it went on for the past few years. They were so distant to me, it became too uncomfortable to live in the same apartment.
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That's why they threw me out, deciding it was for the best and I have my own place now."
Her voice was bitter. And cold. Cold like the artic air outside.
"Weird isn't it?"
"They find me a tutor, talk to me about my academics and then they send me to live in my own apartment."
She sighed again as if she had resigned to her miserable fate long ago.
It was a painful sound. It was so devoid of emotion. Hopeless. Helpless.
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Why was it that it seemed like everyone had their own stories?
Stories that ended in tragedy?
Is humanity that cursed? Is pain and suffering everywhere?
How many of these stories were there?
Family? Friends? Everyone around me?
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Beneath It All
"It must be hard for you." To say the least.
She shrugged. "I got used to it after a while."
I wasn't sure of what else I could say so I let her continue.
"I don't really care anymore. I get so much freedom since I live over here.
They don't come here alot. Only to check up on my studies and whether I was keeping in line.
Other than that, I do whatever I want."
I frowned. That wasn't exactly a comforting notion. I hadn't realized Airu had such a background.
Without guidance, she was for sure going to get tangled up in some kind of trouble.
How could parents do such a cruel thing to their daughter?
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I sighed. I tried to flash her a smile.
"Well, know that I'll always be here for you.
When you need someone to talk to, I'll be all ears."
I touched my right ear for emphasis.
I gave her an encouraging smile.
"Thanks. I owe you so much."
"You can always treat me to lunch or something." I teased.
"Like right now?"
I glanced outside. The glass was foggy from condensation.
"It's a bit cold, best if you stay inside."
"I'll cook us something then."
She struggled to her feet.
"After you take your medicine." I told her sternly.
I held out my arms to support her and she leaned on me,
casting awkward glances at me, wondering what I was thinking.
I could tell she was alot better already.
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Living alone must have taught her wonders, because
what sounded impossible to me, was an effortless task in her hands.
If Aoi and Airu were to be compared in their cooking,
I was afraid that Airu would, by a fair distance, finish on top.
I made a mental note to never let that happen.
Like when she took over for Aoi's cake, I tried to help,
but she assured me with a soft smile that I would only be in the way.
But within minutes, my stomach was grumbling
from the aroma of American sirloin steak,
coupled with peas and corn. Rice on top.
"Itadakimasu!"
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We said grace and started on our food.
The beef was perfectly cooked, tender,
with a slight tinge of pink, like a healthy blush on a baby.
I lavoured gravy over the steak and managed to say in between bites,
"This is amazing stuff."
She blushed and gave a tiny shake of her head to indicate her Japanese humility.
I smiled at her.
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"Thanks for the food."
She smiled. "No problem."
"How are you feeling now?"
"Better."
"Good." I said. i glanced at the large numberless clock hanging on the wall.
"If you're alright, I'm going to have to leave and let you rest a bit."
She nodded. "Yes, you should go." Adding hastily when she noticed the time.
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I helped her set the dishes in the sink
and was about to wash them for her
when she insisted for me to leave first.
She ushered me and my things to the door.
I smiled. "Give me a call if anything happens.
Even if it's in the middle of the night."
She gave me a quick and polite hug.
"You've been such a good friend to me..
I don't know how I can repay you..."
She looked at me with watery eyes.
"It's the least I can do." I repeated.
With that, I bade her farewell and
headed onto the wintry streets.
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From that moment on, something changed between Airu and I.
A subtle click of a gear; maybe the tightening of a bolt.
Suddenly, we were suddenly thrown together, bound together by glue.
For the next few months we grew pretty close and hung out often.
But was this right? Was it okay with Aoi?
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