How can i do this?,

Be in a film with him, knowing he loves me.

I just...I can't believe it.

He doesn't even know me.

He can't love me, can he?

I sigh as i get into the car, today is going to be eventful i am sure..

------

" Economic Crisis they say, a lot of crap if you ask me" Someone says reading from the script

" How do we deal with it if it is true" The next person says.

" We won't need to think that far love" He replies to her.

"Ok guys that's good, keep it up. That's all we will do for today. I told you earlier before we started the script about the extra details, do not forget them and i will see you all on Friday" Benedict says to us all.

We all go to stand up but he puts his hand on top of mine, signaling me to wait.

I just sit while he shows them out.

They all say bye to me as i leave the room.

I smile.

Some of them are kind of big faces, others not so much.

It is nice to meet people in the same 'section' as me.

When Benedict comes back through i stand back up.

" Drink?" he asks.

"No, just get to the point" i say.

"You were very good today" he says.

" Really ben, i mean it". I warn him.

He sighs.

"I need you" he muffles.

"What?".

"I said i need you. I feel completely lost without you" he says.

"I need to go" i say going for the front door but he stops me.

"Do you not feel anything?" he asks.

" Why do you keep asking me this". i say to him.

"Because until i know the truth i will keep asking".

I sigh.

"Will you stop all this if i tell you the truth". i ask.

"I will try" he replies.

"Fine, then yes i may feel something for you and you have been on my mind lately but...Ugh!. Everything is so messed up" i say tears now down my face.

He goes to hug me.

"Don't!, i can't...i cant be near you right now" i say running past him.

"Sarah!, wait!" Ben says running after me.

"No Ben" i reply.

"Please, we need to sort this out. I won't pressure you into anything. Just come in and have a drink, We can not leave it at that" he say to me.

I stand still for a while and then turn around

"Ok but you haven't got long" i say walking back over to him.

"Thank you, now. What would you like to drink?" he asks.

"Whatever you have in the Cupboard" i reply.

He gets out some whisky and pours it into glasses.

"Now do you want to talk?" he asks.

"What is their to say, i have fallen for two men and i have no clue what to do, because you would like that wouldn't you, then you could worm your way in and take me for yourself" i say pissed off.

"No i am trying to help you" he replies.

I sigh. "I know i am sorry" i say.

"Now do you want to talk?" he asks me again.

"What do i do?". i ask him.

"Do what your heart tells you" he says.

I take my glass and gulp down the rest of my drink and then pour more.

"Hey, steady with that, its strong stuff" he says to me.

I shrug before gulping down my drink for a second time.

"I do not know what my heart says" i tell him.

"Well what do you think it say?" he asks.

"I know my head says this is wrong and i should be with tom but my..my heart doesn't seem to know". i sigh.

I get the glass of whisky again and pour it into my cup.

"Well tell me this, do you love tom?".

"Yes of course" i say.

"Ok and do you love me?".

"I...I think so yes. i haven't been able to get you out my head".

I take a big gulp again,

"Well which of us are you actually in love with because you can love someone but not be in love with them".

"I...i don't know" i say tears now down my face.

"Hey, hey please don't cry" he says hugging me.

He goes to pull away but stops when his face is practically touching mine.

"May i take a kiss?" he asks.

"I...I....yes" i say.

Soon his lips are on mine.

Rather than pushing him away i kiss back.

What am i doing.

Am i a horrible person for liking this.

Tom...What will he think.

Suddenly Ben picks me up from the chair.

He kisses my neck before returning to my lips.

"Ben i don't know if this is a good ideas" i say to him.

"You won't know who you really love till you try" he says.

I sigh.

I am a mess....

A/N- Slightly smaller chapter. Hope it is ok. Next one will be tomorrow or Sunday. Hope you enjoyed