ƛ gentle breeze blew across the meadow, causing the tall grass and the wildflowers that covered it to dance.

A young woman, nineteen years of age sat down in the grass. She plucked three blades of grass from the earth and began braiding them together. It was a useless, fruitless task but she was happy for any distraction.

Rey was grateful that the king and queen had given her a job and a room to stay in at the castle. Working as the Queen's handmaiden was easy compared to her previous life of stealing, scavenging, and hunting for a meager meal.

What was hard about living in the castle was King Han and Queen Leia. They were kind, but they would often speak of their son. A man whose name she wished that she would never have to hear again... Kylo Ren.

Twelve years ago she had witnessed him kill her father in battle, it was something she couldn't forgive and it was certainly something she would never forget.

As she'd gotten to know King Han and Queen Leia, she'd come to realize that they were nothing like their son. She didn't understand why their son would betray them when they were so kind and wonderful.

Rey's mind wandered to the moments before she'd come out to the meadow.

She had been helping the queen get ready and they had talked as they often did. Rey had become just as much a companion to her as a handmaiden.

Rey couldn't even remember how the subject had come up, but she'd confessed to stealing food a few times. Especially when she was a child to survive. She wasn't proud of it, but she'd built up a level of trust with the king and queen, she knew that they wouldn't hold her actions as a starving child against her.

Queen Leia didn't seem at all fazed by the revelation, she'd probably suspected it.

As if to keep from embarrassing her or making her feel uncomfortable, Queen Leia had laughed slightly as she changed the subject. "I remember when my son, Ben was little, he used to steal food from the kitchen sometimes. One time he snuck into the kitchen and tried to steal a pie that was cooling on the windowsill, but he was too small to reach it. He tried to climb up on the table to grab it, but he fell and got hurt pretty badly."

The king and queen always called him the name they had given him at birth. A name most had forgotten. The boy named Ben was gone, replaced by a cruel man they called Kylo Ren.

Rey hadn't wanted to talk about him, every time she thought about him she remembered the moment he had killed her father; but for the king and queen's sake, she said nothing. They loved their son. How could she break their hearts by telling them what he had done, the pain he had caused her?

She had fought to hide her emotions as she replied to the queen. "Did he get in trouble?"

"Well, I was mad at him, but when I saw how badly he had been hurt I realized that he had already paid for his mistake. He needed me to love him at that moment."

Clearly, he didn't learn from his mistakes, she thought. "Did he do it again?"

Queen Leia shook her head. "He was a good boy most of the time. He made mistakes but everyone does. I only wish that I hadn't..."

Rey had looked at her, wondering what she had been about to say; but the queen had grown quiet after that seeming to be lost in thought.

"I wish that I could just bring him back home," Leia said finally.

Rey felt cruel because of what she had been thinking when the queen said that; that she didn't want him to come back so that she wouldn't have to see him ever again. She wished that he would fall in battle as her father had; it was what he deserved for what he had done. The world would be better off without him.

I would have killed him myself if I had the opportunity, she thought. That was the very reason she didn't want him to come back. If he did she would most likely become just like him... a murderer.

Now as she sat here in the quiet meadow she struggled with the screaming desires within her, desires for revenge and the death of the renegade prince who had caused her so much grief. But she knew that it wasn't right to hate him or too long for his death, she knew that she should forgive him because it was the right thing to do. But she wasn't strong enough to do it.

She took a deep breath to calm herself, then she began to gather wildflowers. She could tell that the queen needed something to cheer her up. She'd seemed almost on the brink of tears as they sat there in silence. Rey would often pick wildflowers to lift her spirits. She admired Leia, she was strong nothing could bring her down. Nothing could push her to the brink of tears... nothing but the thought of her lost son.

꧁❀꧂

Rey made her way towards the throne room, other servants and the guards gave her odd looks as she walked past. Her light tan dress was dirty from laying in the grass and she held a large bouquet of wildflowers. Most of the servants didn't think that the wildflowers were worthy of the royal hall. She sighed, she didn't even fit in among the servants. How do they expect me to know how to behave in royal company when I've been alone on the streets since I was seven years old? she thought.

Ignoring them, she stepped into the long open space of the throne room. The room was so long that it appeared to be narrow, but it was an optical illusion. The room was just as wide as the dining hall and the ballroom, but it was much longer making it appear narrow.

In the middle of the floor a soft blue carpet covered the hard cobblestones, it ran from the large doors at the front to the two thrones that sat on the inclined end of the room, directing the guests' gaze at the king and queen who sat there.

The bare stone walls were decorated with sapphire drapes and Alderaan's standard, a large white star on a deep blue backdrop that had always reminded Rey of the one that had shown over Bethlehem on the night Jesus was born. Surrounding the large star were several smaller stars. She had always loved Alderaan's standard; she loved starlight. It was one of the most beautiful parts of God's creation. Through her hardships she'd come to view life as a night sky, sometimes there was more darkness than light but that only made the stars shine brighter. She might not have many stars in her life, but the ones she did have were beautiful.

She bowed her head slightly in respect to King Han and Queen Leia as she walked across the throne room floor.

"I picked these for you." She smiled at Queen Leia. Her smile wasn't genuinely happy; she hadn't truly smiled since her father died. But it was full of affection and compassion. She could see the same emotions in Leia's eyes that she felt herself. That deep sorrow, they were both good at keeping it hidden.

Like Rey, Queen Leia wore a mask; their smiles were fake and their laughs were forced. Rey worked hard to portray herself as a happy person, and Queen Leia tried to keep the regal command she'd always had; each of them hiding what was inside. For Rey, it was grief and hate, and for Leia... Rey had discovered that it was guilt. It wasn't easy to see past the facade the Queen had created, but Rey could see it because she knew what it felt like to keep her emotions locked away.

Queen Leia smiled, equally as affectionate. It was a happier smile than Rey had ever seen and that lifted her spirits slightly. "Thank you, dear."

Rey nodded then she went over to a table on the left side of the room. On it was a vase filled with the wildflowers she'd picked the day before and refreshments for the king and queen.

Rey finished arranging the new flowers she had picked in the vase. Then she turned to look at King Han and Queen Leia; the closest thing to a family she had now. She gave them a warm smile.

They smiled affectionately in return.

"Is there anything I can get for you, your majesties?" Rey asked in a kind voice.

"No, but thank you for the flowers," Queen Leia replied sincerely.

Rey smiled at the queen's gratitude, it made her feel good inside that she liked them.

She was just glad that she had brightened Queen Leia's day a little. At times she felt that King Han and Queen Leia needed this kind of affection... the kind of affection that a child would give their parents more than anything else. If she was honest, she needed the love of a mother and father just as much; but she was afraid so she kept a small gap between them. She'd already lost her parents, they'd already lost their child; could either of them bear to lose another? Perhaps they were all holding back out of fear of repeating the past.

It was a fear deep down that she didn't even know she had... because she lost her father when she was young. She was afraid to love anyone because she knew the pain of losing a loved one and it was something she never wanted to feel again. Without realizing it, she pushed people away; keeping a safe distance from them to prevent having attachments and the pain she knew would come when they were broken. Indeed she'd never felt the grief of loss again, but she'd never felt love again either and as a result, she was lonely.

She tried to push those thoughts aside; to break the walls so that perhaps she could be happy again, maybe have a family again. She wanted to tell them that she loved them as a mother and father, but she was afraid. What if she lost them? She could never bear the heartbreak again; her heart was in a thousand pieces, if she lost anyone else she was afraid that that thousand would become a million.

Deciding not to say anything, she curtsied then turned and slipped out of one of the side doors in the throne room, to finish the rest of her daily chores.

Once Rey had left the throne room; Leia heaved a deep sigh, her smile now gone.

"It's strange but sometimes having her around makes me think of our son," Leia told Han. When their son...Ben was a small child he would wander off into the meadows, much to the dismay of his nursemaid to pick wildflowers for his mother.

Han nodded. "Sometimes I think I try to reach out to her to make up for not doing so with Ben."

"There's a part of me that wants to take her in as our daughter; but then deep down I'm afraid that if we did I would make the same mistakes that I did with Ben. I still blame myself that he..."

"Leia it's not your fault," Han interrupted.

"Han, we have to take responsibility for our mistakes. We never should have sent him to be trained by Snoke, he was a child of course he was going to follow the one who was taking care of him."

"But I was the one who wanted him to learn how to fight, not you," Han answered.

"But I agreed, I should have said no."

"Leia, Snoke was our friend you couldn't have known what he was planning."

Leia nodded. "I still feel guilty. I miss him, I want him to come back home."

"Even if he does, we will have to do something to punish him; the council would never accept it otherwise."

Leia nodded gravely.

꧁❀꧂

The next day was as beautiful as the last. Rey loved the spring, she wished that it could last forever. But she knew that if it did it wouldn't be as beautiful as it was after waiting through the long winter months to see the flowers bloom again.

She added the new flowers she had picked into the vase with the ones she'd picked the day before, which were still fresh thanks to the cool temperature inside the stone walls of the castle. She knew that when summer came she would have to replace them more often than she did in the spring.

(Art by Space Satan)

She looked in the mirror that hung over the table. I wonder how my mother looked when she was my age?... I wonder if she looked like me, she thought. Her father had always said that she favored her mother, but Rey had always imagined that her mother was probably a little more beautiful than she was. I wish I had a panting of her, I wish I'd been able to get to know her or that Da would have talked about her more, but I know that it was probably too painful for him. Her mother died in childbirth and the only thing Rey knew about her was that she loved her, her father had always told her that; he had said that her last words were to never let their daughter forget that she loved her. Rey had always been grateful for those words, they were the only part of her mother that she had.

Shaking the thought away, she turned and slipped out of one of the side doors in the throne room. She stopped in the hall as she heard a commotion. She turned back towards the throne room to see what the fuss was about when a guard burst into the throne room and began speaking excitedly.

"Sir... we've finally captured him." It was not the proper way to start any conversation, and it was certainly no way to greet a king.

The guard was fortunate that King Han had never been the formal type; he had become the king of Alderaan by marriage to the love of his life, Princess Leia. Now her parents were dead and the weight of ruling the kingdom fell upon him and his wife.

King Han looked at the guard patiently. "Calm down, Poe. Start from the beginning."

"Kylo..." he breathed the name of the enemy general feared by most in the kingdom. He had slain many of their soldiers in battle. Just the mention of his name brought fear to most who heard it, he was a legend. The kind of legend that appeared in frightening folktales and the nightmares of children.

But there was no fear on the king and queen's faces, only pain. But why would they fear their son? They knew him beyond the terrifying name that filled the streets, they knew his true name and who he had once been before this dreaded war. Rey did too...from their stories, but she didn't see him as the king and queen did. She couldn't.

"Ben?" Queen Leia gasped, surprise written across her features.

Poe nodded, confirming that he spoke of their son. "He's been captured in battle and brought here your majesties."

The queen looked at her husband and whispered. "Our son is finally home."

He offered her an encouraging smile, but Rey knew him well enough to know that he was more nervous than he was letting on. King Han was normally very good at hiding his true feelings, but his voice betrayed him. "Bring him in."

Poe nodded. "Yes, your majesty." He stepped out of the throne room.

Moments later he returned with three other guards and a prisoner bound in chains.

Rey watched from the hall door, out of sight. As the prince entered the room, she felt her pulse quicken and her heart hammer in her chest. Anger filled her and she glared as she saw him; her father had been killed by him in battle, and now she was an orphan...because of him. Her family had been very poor, so she had nothing, no home, no family. She had roamed the streets and woods alone, fighting to survive because of him.

The prince was just as anyone would imagine a prince to be. He was beautiful, his thick black locks framed his pale face and fell to his shoulders. His eyes were dark and she knew that if his gaze had been directed at her, they would have pierced her skin to gaze into her heart. Snaking down his left cheek was a scar that he had received in battle. Despite that, he didn't look like a monster he looked...

...but beneath his outer appearance was no man... she interrupted her thoughts... he was a monster. He wasn't the innocent young man he appeared as, he was an evil corrupt warlord with a heart of stone and blood of iron, and all she could see when she looked at him was hate. If she hadn't known who he was or what he had done, perhaps she would have seen the brokenness in his eyes. Perhaps she would have seen him as the frightened boy that he was instead of the monster she imagined him as.

The guards roughly threw him to the floor, so that he landed on his knees in front of the two thrones.

Rey felt no compassion for him, in fact, she rather enjoyed seeing him be thrown to the floor in such an aggressive manner. It was more than he deserved and far less than she would have given him. She knew that it was wrong but she had sought revenge for years, hoping that one day she could meet him so that she could plunge a knife into his chest, but she knew that she couldn't do that. She wasn't a murderer and she couldn't just kill him in cold blood, all she could do was hope that his punishment would be a terrible one.

Queen Leia stood and approached her son, and Rey found herself hoping that she would slap Kylo in the face since she couldn't do it herself. Leia moved her hand towards his face... but as her hand came in contact with his cheek, it was a gentle touch. Not one of anger, but one of love. Leia bent down and kissed her son on the top of his head. Rey was amazed, his mother loved him even though he didn't deserve it. But of course, she was his mother... and deep down she knew that no good mother could ever stop loving their children, no matter what they had done.

As Leia stepped away, Han looked at his son with a war of compassion and anger waging in his eyes. "You have sided with Snoke in this rebellion against your kingdom," his voice was emotionless as he spoke. "Do you have anything to say for yourself?"

Kylo remained silent. He shook his head.

Of course, he doesn't have anything to say for himself, Rey thought. What could he possibly say to undo the things he's done?

"All I can do is beg your forgiveness, Father," he spoke, at last, his voice breaking with emotion.

His remorse was like a knife in Rey's heart, he sounded sincere. But that didn't mean that she would forgive him, he probably didn't even remember killing her father. Worse, he probably didn't care.

"You don't need to beg, Ben. Your mother and I have already forgiven you. Forgiveness is a gift and we give it to you gladly."

"Thank you, Father," he let out a small sigh of relief, but still kept his head hung.

"But... trust is something you must earn," Han continued in a grave and somber voice.

Tears filled Ben's eyes. "How... how can I earn your trust? After..." he trailed off to keep himself from crying. "...after everything I did?"

The smallest trace of compassion entered the king's eyes. "Prove to us that you can change, and become a man who your mother and I would be proud to call our son. Who Alderaan would be proud to call her king one day."

"I will never deserve the crown, Father, but I do want to be worthy of the mercy that you have shown me," Ben replied.

Han nodded, then continued in a pained voice. "Even though we forgive you, we cannot let your crimes go unpunished."

"I will accept any punishment you give, father," Ben replied. "I know I deserve it."

"We will discuss your fate with the council, I'm sorry son but this isn't our decision to make on our own," King Han looked at his son for a moment before continuing. "Take him to the dungeon."

The guards escorted him out of the throne room, at their king's command.