《The Arrangement |1|》Chapter Twenty

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Fireworks.

Everywhere he touched her, there were fireworks erupting.

The kiss was full of passion and desire, something Madeline never thought she'd have with Emerson. He was always neutral or angry. He never acted as though he was a lover, just a fighter.

But what was between them was raw and real. This love, this passion, it was not some conjure of imagination. It was not fake or using each other. It was not to forget. Their love was real.

Madeline slid her hands into his hair, pressing her body closer, closer until she wasn't sure where she ended and Emerson began.

She was too impatient to pull off his clothes, and he seemed to have the same mindset as he ripped her shirt from her body. It was a good thing that she didn't care for that shirt. Otherwise she would have been upset enough to pull back and scold him for it. She couldn't complain either because she ripped his shirt too.

Her hands left his hair and ran over the muscles of his chest. Madeline pulled away at the sound of his groan. She reached her hand up and stroked his cheek. His eyes fell closed as he tilted his head into her head. She trailed her fingers down his neck and to his chest. She took her time exploring every muscle, every ridge, every scar she could see and touch.

Last time had been unpleasurable. It had been done because they had too. But this time, this time she wanted to take her time. She wanted to explore him. She wanted to learn what would make him explode, what turned him on, what caused him to fall over the cliff into desire. She wanted to learn it all. She wanted to it right this time.

He groaned again, though it sounded more painful this time. She understood why, she felt why against her thigh. But when she tried to unbutton his jeans, he snatched her hands. He gently placed them back on his chest.

Message received.

It was his turn to explore her.

A single claw ripped her bra and he removed it from her. For a moment, he just stared at her and it began to make her nervous.

Did he not like what he saw?

Was there something wrong with her body?

But then he cupped her breasts and she shoved those silly questions away. She held onto his biceps. Her head fell forward once he started to knead them. It didn't last as long as she would have liked. She whimpered when his hands moved down to her stomach. His finger traced the pale, horizontal line across her stomach. She was thankful he didn't ask what happened.

His hands slid back up until they cupped her cheeks. He leaned forward and pressed his lips to hers. It was much slower this time, passionate yes, but slower. Exploring.

He nipped at her bottom lip and she opened her mouth for him. He swept in the moment her lips parted. He tasted and explored every inch of her mouth, and she him.

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At some point, he stood up, keeping her in his arms. She wrapped her legs around his waist and his hands gripped her ass in support. He carried her the short distance to their bed and he laid her down so gently, so delicately. Madeline could almost cry at the tenderness he was showing her.

Emerson kneeled in between her legs. He strong hands took off her shoes and tossed them aside. He gently undid the button on her jeans. She raised her hips for him and slowly inched them off her body.

Madeline suddenly was very glad that she had shaved them the day before, otherwise, he would be dealing with guerrilla legs.

He picked up on a leg and skimmed his lips along her ankle, her calf.

Keep going, she pleaded. Further.

But he didn't.

That little tease.

Well, not little. He wasn't little at all. Everything about him was big. Everything.

She made a whining noise and he shifted his attention to her face.

"All in good time, my love," he murmured as he set her leg down.

Ever so slowly, his hands trailed up her legs and thigh. His fingers hooked in her underwear. He slid them down, his eyes never leaving her hers. And then she was bare before him.

He took his sweet time drinking in his fill. He watched as she withered. She needed him. she needed him to touch her, she needed him to do something, anything.

With a smirk, he lowered himself and placed his mouth upon her.

***

Madeline's head was placed on her mate's chest, listening to his heartbeat. One of his hands were tenderly stroking her back. The other hand was holding onto hers.

They laid together, their legs tangled under the sheets, their nude bodies pressed close. Madeline's hair was still wet from the shower they had taken not thirty minutes ago. They had taken hours, many hours, to learn each other's body. They had small breaks in between, to regain their breaths, but then they were back in each other's arms again.

It hurt, where Madeline's neck and shoulder met. In the midst of their passion, they had remarked each other. It meant more than it did the first time. It was more than just a duty. They claimed each other because they chose each other, they chose to be mates.

Madeline loved this man, this Alpha. She was happy and wanted to spend eternity with him. But...there was this guilt in the back of her head. It was pushing forward and she could not ignore it any longer.

It was time to let go.

Her aching muscles barked in pain as she rolled off the bed. She grabbed one of Emerson's shirts and slipped it on.

Madeline opened the doors to the veranda and slipped outside. Emerson followed suit a few moments. He went to put his arm around her but she moved out of reach. She needed to do this, and if he kept touching her, she wouldn't be able to go through with it.

She turned her head to the side and spoke, "I need you to listen to me. I need you to listen and not interrupt."

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His eyebrows were furrowed in concern, but he nodded. "Okay."

Madeline looked away and out at the Pack lands. She clasped her trembling hands in front of her. She took a deep breath and opened her mouth, "I was sixteen and in love with the idea of love. I was obsessed with finding my mate. I had begged my father time and time again to let me go to other Packs and see if I could find him. he turned me down every time. He always said, 'You are too young. Life your life a little. When you're older, we'll talk.' Turns out, I didn't have to wait that long.

"My parents threw a big party for Sebastian's eighteenth birthday. They invited wolves from Packs all around, in hopes that he would find his mate. He didn't, but I did. I remember getting ready for the party. I was telling everyone that I was going to find my mate. No one believed me of course. I was sixteen. It's rare for a wolf at such a young age to find their mate. But I did. I didn't find him immediately. I met him when it was time to cut the cake.

"At the time, I thought it would be a smart idea to stand on the table in heels, and sing happy birthday to my big brother. It was not a smart idea. I was trying to get down when I fell, and there he was, my mate, saving the day. He caught me. And I couldn't stop staring at him. I'm pretty sure he thought I was a creepy stalker." Madeline giggled slightly. "He introduced himself. 'I'm Lucas,' he said. Sebastian had to pinch my ribs to get me to respond. My parents were a little wary because he was three years older than me and I was their little girl. But after a week, I was able to wear them down.

"We were mated as soon as we could. We got our own little cottage a little way from the Pack House. Everything was fine. For two years, we had the happily ever after for two years." She wiped away the tears that were forming. "Then the war came and that happily ever after was ripped away from me."

She had to take a minute, for the tears were coming too hard and she couldn't speak. It was so hard, so hard to let go. But she needed to do this, for Emerson's and her sakes. She had to let go and move on.

She wiped her nose and straightened her back. "I was pregnant. I found out just as the war had begun. Lucas and I were so happy but so scared. We didn't want our child to be born in the middle of a war zone. Our Pack got sucked into it and Lucas got drafted. The last time I saw him, he promised me that he would come back to me. But he didn't. I lost him. I lost him and our son." She cried then. She cried for the loss of her unborn child. She cried for the loss of her Lucas. "I gave up and I lost my son. They tried to save him, tried to cut him out of me. But he didn't survive."

She didn't stop Emerson from folding her into his arms this time. She didn't stop him from cradling her, rocking her, trying to soothe her. He stroked her back, her hair. He was there for her as she cried, supporting her.

Her cries eventually ceased. She tilted her head up towards him and he kissed her forehead, her nose, and lastly her lips. She sighed against his mouth and relaxed into his touch. He pulled back and tucked her head on his chin.

"I met my Abigail when I was eighteen. I was visiting her Pack. I was in a meeting with her Alpha when she burst in, exclaim that his son had his head stuck in a bucket again. I knew she was mine the moment I set my eyes on her. I took her back to the Night Walker Pack and we were declared mates, Alpha and Luna.

"She was a firecracker. She pushed the limits, the boundaries. She always wanted to go out there and do." There was a smile on her lips as he spoke about her. "She loved being active, loved being involved with everything. She drove me crazy with all the things she had planned. We rarely ever had a break, but I loved her, so I didn't care.

"And then she was taken away from me and I couldn't avenge her. I didn't know who did it. I could never catch them." A tear fell down his cheek. Madeline raised her hand and caught it. "I will never forget that day. I will never forget that I failed her."

He looked down at her and cupped her cheeks. "I will never fail you, Madeline. I swear it, with everything that I am. I will not fail you."

She pressed her forehead against his. "You could never fail me, Emerson. No matter what you do. You won't fail me."

Madeline kissed him. His lips were salty, or perhaps that was her, tasting her own tears. Her arms slid around his neck as he picked her up. She clung to him. Her legs clasped around his hips as he began the trek back to their bed.

The clothes were ripped from their bodies once more. Madeline was laid down on the bed and she pulled her mate on top of her.

And for the first time, she wasn't guilty. She had finally let go. Let go of her lost mate, let go of her lost child. She let go and the world was so much brighter. She let go and her love for Emerson grew.

She let go.

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