《Critique And Editing Info》Critique: Our Sinful Fate
Advertisement
Our Sinful Fate
CittyKills
Action, Romance, mafia, bad-boy , Mature
Mysterious. I love the use of black & white coloring. The man standing out more.
I really like it. It has me thinking; how will these two meet? How will they fall for each other? And who will leave their life, the mafia world or government world?
5 💙💙💙💙💙
There are some things you need to look over. Some missing I's and the's and the subject (EX: The yellow what?) I really like how it is paced, it's action. I really enjoy how she is the badass one, not the damsel in distress. This story is just WOW! At first, i thought it was going to be like this mafia series I read from Amazon, but it's WAY different. Which is good. I will definitely try to read more when I have time. Keep Writing.
Rate from 1-5
💙💙💙💙💙
1: Poor/Needs MAJOR editing
2: Almost there/ needs fixing/need practice
3: Good/Needs a little editing
4: Good/Needs a little editing/may recommend/may read on
5: EXCELLENT/will recommend to followers, friends/may read on
Advertisement
- In Serial15 Chapters
Soul CLash
. A young man named Lucas Helios was living his ordinary life. He was walking home from school then suddenly he heard someone talk from his mind not knowing what is it he just shrugged it off like it was imagination but he was suddenly engulfed by a blinding light and he found himself in a white room. There he met God that gives the opportunity to change his boring life into an exciting one. He wil be transported into a world filled with battle but he didn't know what was the reason God has chosen him. Watch as Lucas discover what lies ahead of this so called exciting new life(NOTE: Im just new at this so please if I had mistake feel free to tell it and suggestions are wecome ^.^)
8 148 - In Serial47 Chapters
[Kengkla x Techno] Unfinished Business (Love by Chance Fanfic)
Kengkla hasn't seen Techno since that night. But with no answer about where they stand after Techno ran out of his own house, it's been eating at Kengkla all week. So he tracks Techno down after a game. ---This starts a week after the last episode. I haven't read the book, so I have no idea if it follows it.[Contains Mature Content!]
8 125 - In Serial15 Chapters
dungeon of mass destruction
a dungeon that was bored and fell in love with chaos and had a dungeon pixie as a partner.decided he would become a spaceship and make dungeon outposts on everyworld he finds he then decided to use his dungeon powers to cause chaos supreme.inspired by slime dungeon, 9001 a dungeon ship oddesy, i was reincarnated as a magic accademywhat will be left in his wake ???
8 184 - In Serial34 Chapters
The Nether Wolf [CURRENTLY ON HIATUS!]
THE AUTHOR IS TAKING SOME TIME OFF.NOTHING TO DO WITH THE SMALL HIATUS MENTIONED LATER ON THE DESCRIPTION. WRITING WILL RESUME LATER THIS MONTH (FEBRUARY). Don't you just hate it when you're walking home from school and you accidentally stumble into another dimension? And now you're stuck in there with no way out, thinking of what to do in this medieval kinda world. Well at least it seems safe...It seems that some people have problem with multiple POV (Point of View) characters and so I'm deciding to alter the description to mention, that sometimes in the story we see the world from other people's point of view than our MC's (Main Character). But there is a MC and the point of view changes are few, except for short point after the season 1 ends. These are mostly done to expand the world and introduce plot elements, nothing more.This story is written in manner of seasons, which aren't marked in the chapter titles and don't really affect your reading experience, but between the seasons are small, 2-7 day hiatuses so the writer can rest and plan.Oh, the website released a mature-content tagging rules, so here: Warning, Mature [17+] Violence,gore and occasional swearing. Mainly put it at 17+ so it doesn't restrict me, but story could be considered as 15+, no way 18+ though.
8 79 - In Serial15 Chapters
Muna Miracle
Do you believe in Miracles? In 1980, a memorable moment in sports was during the XII Winter Olympics. Cold war tensions were high and the U.S Olympic hockey team found themselves against the indomitable Soviet Army Hockey team. The announcer, Al Michael posed a question that would forever be fixed in the minds of every man, woman, and child that ever wished for hope. That year, Soviets went home that year with the Olympic cup, soon followed by a nuclear warhead and the question would remain unanswered for many hundreds of years. Of course, a little ray of moonlight might change a few things.
8 179 - In Serial28 Chapters
TIKTOKDrama
When a bunch of famous tiktokers get invited to one house and have to stay there for 4 MONTHS STRAIGHT
8 157
Prev Chap
Next Chap
Chap List
Boy
Girl
