《Critique And Editing Info》Critique: A Date With Danger
Advertisement
A Date With Danger
madisueb
Fantasy, Adventure, Romance, Space, Time travel
It's nice and sweet, but it didn't really catch my eye.
WOW!! I do suggest to use man instead of boy. When people say, boy, I think of 8-15 year old.
OH MY GAWWWWD!!! Since reading your other zodiac book, I'm so excited for this one. IT'S HIS DAD!!!! OMG!! There were only two things needing fixing. (I commented them on your story)
4 💙💙💙💙
All is already said. If I have time I will read on. Keep Writing.
Hamilton was all I could think of when reading this "MY SHOT" "I'm not throwing away, MY SHOT!" AHAHHHH!
Rate from 1-5
💙💙💙💙💙
1: Poor/Needs MAJOR editing
2: Almost there/ needs fixing/need practice
3: Good/Needs a little editing
4: Good/Needs a little editing/may recommend/may read on
5: EXCELLENT/will recommend to followers, friends/may read on
Advertisement
- In Serial446 Chapters
Aiming To Be The Best Magician In The World!
Vol 2 is where stuff will get serious.
8 325 - In Serial18 Chapters
The Rise Of The Death God
Author:Zerdescht Editors:Sasha,Sanehen Imagine Laying a Egg, just to fall unconscious soon after and wake up 30 years in the past. This is a story about a man's apocalyptic life and his road to become a death god. Prepare yourselves for action-filled scenes as well as twisted minds. The greatest Adventure group you could possibly imagine and the strangest weapons on top of it. A 20 year old shota shall show you his will to fight for his survival once more! WARNING SENSITIVE CONTENTWill be continued as soon as possible. Sexual Content Currently in only one chapter Skippable since it is not Lore worthy.
8 69 - In Serial20 Chapters
Descent
After the disappearance of the one true God, the three realms were thrown into disorder.As the demons rose up from the underworld, angels descended from their holy city and the never-ending war began.This war was fought in the human realm, a world separating heavens and hell. Mortals, who had no ability to retaliate against the divine, were decimated to a only fraction of their former glory.Four hundred years later, the everlasting dispute has fallen into a deadlock. Until a human entered the game...
8 148 - In Serial15 Chapters
Get Off the Mountain
Odon and Terry want to get off the mountain and far, far away from their remote village before the next Sacrifice Day. Terry relies on superstitions while Odon relies on common sense. Terry carves charms too keep souls safe and Odon, she follows an old goat that leads her to a single path which winds down the side of the mountain. Note: May be considered grimdark for certain readers, please be advised this work discusses death.
8 143 - In Serial13 Chapters
The Cat's Eve
Suddenly the world is thrust into a seemingly benevolent system and the entire world changes and Caelum just happens to be stuck in school when this occurs. With the entire school diving into chaos can Caelum get his wits together and tackle this new world with determination. It probably helps that he has a trusty cat with him as well... Cover by: Jack0fheart on RR! Schedule: Whenever I post, I'll try to post once a week though. Also this is my first novel ever so advice and constructive critcism is highly appreciated!
8 123 - In Serial11 Chapters
Gur-dun: Grey's Selection.
Afterlife advocates have a difficult job, they never get the easy assignments. Balancing the Benefits, Penalties, and Goals for each client's new life is tricky, every time Mr. Grey must do what he can with what he has. Mr Grey's latest client has been royally screwed by his previous life, and worse, by interns to the reincarnation system.The only solution Mr. Grey could find might be worse than his clients previous life...This is the unfortunate and amazing life of Gur-dun, Son of Suffering.
8 179
Prev Chap
Next Chap
Chap List
Boy
Girl
