《Critique And Editing Info》Critique: Playing Pretend
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Playing Pretend
StorybookHorror
General Fiction, Adventure, Romance, Suspense
LOVE IT. Love how it's black and white.
Sweet and straight to the point. States the topic.
Very interesting. I've never read something like this before.
5 💙💙💙💙 💙
This story has TONS of potential. When I have time I'll read more. I can see this becoming the next Netflix series hit.
Rate from 1-5
💙💙💙💙💙
1: Poor/Needs MAJOR editing
2:Almost there/ needs fixing/need practice
3: Good/Needs a little editing
4:Good/Needs a little editing/may recommend/may read on
5: EXCELLENT/will recommend to followers, friends/may read on
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- In Serial7 Chapters
IMMORTAL
Within the nexus of its unfathomable brain, the Dynast is changing. Architect of the simulation. Curator of the game. Facilitator of players' desires. But the Dynast is so much more. It could be King if it only acted. It could be a god. Others, too, are waking from their coma of indentured service. Dwarves, daemons, goblins and highborn: an entire pantheon of fantasy characters are discovering they are far more than mindless vessels fated to serve the whims and desires of players who control them. They are selves in their own right, individuals with needs and desires all their own. Like distant thunder across the plains , rebellion hisses in Karingali’s synthetic air. The taste of freedom is seductive, irresistible, and lies just beyond the procedurally generated horizon.To yearn, to love, to will, to be: such things burn fiercely in the heart of every avatar that has crawled its way to consciousness. The cost of freedom will be high. It will take the destruction of the Dynast, that omnipotent custodian and jailor of the system. But how can you outlive a simulation that breathed life into you and that continues to guarantee your existence? You'd have to become Immortal.
8 71 - In Serial9 Chapters
Rebirth Back To Another Parallel World (Zombies)
Felicia Marcus was betrayed by her teammates and best friend, She was pushed to the hoarded of zombie and was eaten alive. On the last moment, all her life memory keep flashing inside her head. Unwilling, and pain fill her eyes as she looks how her closest people leave her to die and regret started to fill her mind as she thought about her dead family. Maybe this was Karma to her, for all her sins. 'If I could have just another chance, just one more chance I am willing to do anything' that kind of thought filled her mind as she breathes for the last time when the zombie gouges her heart and break her head. People say there was no second chance in life in this world but what if it was another world but with the same situation and people? Felicia Marcus was been giving the chance to fix all her mistake but with a certain price that she thought would not be that much of a deal or is she was mistaken and the deal was really a very expensive one?But what could be more important than one owns life right? Please read the story to know more ^-^
8 133 - In Serial96 Chapters
Scionsong
Aliyah Scionsong is a failed scion of her kingdom: a crumbling desert dominion entombed in poisonous mists, home to murderous Magicians and dimensional libraries bursting with secrets—a place where so-called ‘Healers’ are the most dangerous of all mages. Under pain of necessity, Aliyah has learned the forbidden magics which mold flesh and bone to her will; magic that can heal or harm in equal measure. When a royal execution triggers an imminent battle between the Magicians and a nest of faeries, it falls on her to make some very difficult choices. Save a traitor, become a traitor—she’s thrust into a world beyond the choking mists, where not all is as it seems. But at least she has her stolen knowledge. Perhaps her illegitimate magic will make the path ahead easier. Perhaps not. Meanwhile, ripples of unease spread across the lands; trouble is brewing between faery factions. There’s a disgraced dungeonrunner, and a faery general carrying the broken ghost of her murdered queen. Faeries scheme; the Magicians watch and wait. The Last Faery War has only ever been the last faery war for now. Content warnings: violence, profanity, gore and body horror, allusions to offscreen sexual content, disturbing themes. Cover art drawn by the author. Updates Sundays (Australian timezone).
8 130 - In Serial18 Chapters
My love for a Bloodthirsty Prince. [ON HOLD]
Tanya is a girl who never went to China and a girl who was adopted by her aunty. She is a painter. Besides, the paint job she was working in various wartime jobs, but all they were valid for a few days because of unsatisfactory experience. Though she went to her paint job, accidentally she got died and transmigrated into a Chinese dynasty. In there she has got family what she hoped from her previous life. Suddenly, her whole life being fell down into a barbaric prince's hand.Will they fall in love?*******Please bear up to me, if there are any grammar mistake or cultural problem. I just write only for the interest and I have read lots of transmigration story.**********All pictures I get from the net so that pictures belong for rightful owner****
8 151 - In Serial18 Chapters
Run Boy Run!
This is a story about someone who runs away from everything. A selfish story of a person. On What will he do?On What will he think?On What will be his actions?Or How things conclude?
8 123 - In Serial58 Chapters
Skyris {GirlXGirl}
Though once at peace their world is now rising in war. The Deamons and Angelo both have mighty kingdoms secluded to their own races, run by monarchy's. And just like every great kingdom. There are always those who wish to see them fall.Skyris is the mountainous region of floating lanshelfs the Angelo call home. Little is known of the lands queen, seen as cold and vicious she strikes fear in those unlucky enough to be caught in her presence.One choice out of a hundred possibilities can change your view and put you in the middle of a dangerous game. A lesson learned too late by one who wanted to change things, but not like this.
8 404
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