Three years back.....

I felt plenty of wires running over my body and it hurt me everywhere. My head, my hands, my legs, every where hurts. I could hear muffled voices coming from somewhere, but I couldn't understand anything. I strained my ears more and at once something inside my head started pounding and I could hear no more.

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A constant beep sound woke me up. But then again the pain started flowing through my body, but less severe than before. There were still wires bound to my body. I try opening my eyes, but it felt like stuck together. Frustrated I moved my right hand, to rub my face and suddenly pain shot through it, as I tried to lift it. I heard someone familiar but then again before I could listen more I fell into a pit of unconsciousness.

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I felt someone running their fingers through my hair. But there was not a single noise. There was no more pain but just numbness. I tried again to open my eyes or even talk. It was as if something was pulling me back. I strained every cell in my body to open my eyes but felt pain shoot to my head. Then a little spot of bright light shot through making me wince.

I tried again slowly opening my eyes, blinking it a few times to adjust to the light. There was a throbbing pain inside my head, making me to close my eyes again.

"It hurts.", my voice weak and rough.

"It's.....it's okay! I'll....I'll call the doctor."

Who was it? Someone familiar. I open my eyes slightly, only to see someone's back. A lady. The pain increases and I close my eyes. I could hear noises around me, but I was too tired to concentrate.

I felt someone softly patting my cheek and I tried to open my eyes again. As my mind fought to comprehend who was leaning over me, my body shut down.

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My head and back felt as if I was on fire. Unlike before I was able to stay conscious for a few minutes before the pain started getting to me. I woke up only to find a nurse, who helped me with some water first and then had gone to fetch the doctor. I laid there waiting for him, while my mind gathered up what had happened to my life. Megha, Remya, Arjun, my parents, rain, car, my baby......

Suddenly my left hand wraps over my abdomen, for some reassurance. But then emptiness crept into my mind, telling me what to expect. I couldn't have lost him too. My mind slowly fell into a panic attack when the sound of door opening and footsteps distracted me.

I blankly stared at the doctor, an elderly man in his late sixties, as he started while the nurse checked the wires around me and the monitors it attached to....

"Miss. Pooja?", I nod my head in reply.

"I'm Dr.Vasant. And I'll be asking you some questions and kindly answer them.", he gives me an encouraging smile before starting.

It seems like I was hit by a van and not a car and also with the force of it hitting my abdomen and left leg, I was thrown onto a nearby shops glass window. I had serious injuries to the back of my head and back, apparently where several peices of glass had stuck. My left leg and right hand were fractured. It was still a question if I would be able to ever walk or stand due to my serious injuries to spine. The doctors had put me into a medicine induced coma, so that I wouldn't be in much pain. And also I have been here for the past one and a half month.

After answering to the doctor's questions, he was preparing to leave when I asked the most dreaded question...

"My baby....Is he fine?"

Dr.Vasant was a known surgeon around the state not just for his skill but also on the fact how much he was cut and dried with his patients. And now seeing him visibly tense dread crept into my mind.

"With the amount of blood loss and the hit to your abdomen we couldn't do much. We are really sorry for your loss.", I nod my head and blankly stare at the bare white wall in front of me as the doctor and nurse leaves the room.

Sorry for your loss... the words kept repeating itself inside my brain as I tried to digest it.

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Would it make me a bad mother if I didn't know how to mourn for my baby. Even before I could get my head round the fact I was pregnant, I was carrying a life inside me, God had to just snatch it away. What did I even do to suffer all this? Everything I had wished in my life, every single thing, be it parents, love, husband, God would just give me a taste of it before rudely snatching it away.

I close my eyes and let the thoughts to take over my consciousness.

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Almost an year had passed and I was currently on my first day of work. Ma had come over to visit me on the same day Dr.Vasant had dropped the bomb, to drop another bomb to top everything off. My real father, the one who was the reason for my birth.

It took me weeks to open up and speak to anyone, even to Ma or my dad, the only two persons now constant in my life. It is like I'm waiting for them to leave me too. After getting discharged from hospital I had been staying with dad and also a house maid, who now helps me with my life.

I was officially categorised as a crippled being, who was set to leave her life in a wheel chair. Dr.Vasant had reffered me to the top physiotherapist, Dr.Prameela and now I had to visit her everyday for three f*king boring hour session. She had a lot of hope in my recovery.

Dad had earlier introduced me to his assistant, Ryan. Who is now turning out to become a close friend. I was going through some paper work for dad's next project when Ryan came in to take me out for lunch.

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As we sat down, basically he sat since I was already in a wheelchair, at a corner table, at a local restaurant, a waitress came in to take our order. As I looked up, the least expected person stood before me. Even she had her mouth hanging open, surprised to see me.

Something like guilt, passed through her face before she looked away and awkwardly stood there. Sensing the tension in the air, Ryan cleared his throat to catch both of our attention. He ordered for both of us and she left taking it. He didn't bother to ask me anything knowing the only answer he would get was silence.

What was she doing here? Wasn't she supposed to be with Arjun? And what surprised me more was her unmistakable baby bump! From the looks she would be approximately four or five months pregnant.

I was broke from my thoughts when she came back with our food. She left a small slip of paper on my lap as she was served us. I didn't take the paper till she was out of sight.

Need to talk personally. Pls.

6754xxxxxx

~R

I crumble the paper and put it in my bag and start having the food.

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Coming back from the office, I take a shower and then proceed to sit in my balcony, with the maid's help. I sit there going over the pro's and con's of calling Renuka. But did she really expect me to contact her? Of all people her!

But I needed answers. Why wasn't she with Arjun? And out of all places how did she end up as a waitress with a baby bump? Curiosity got the better of me and I dialled her number.

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