It all felt just like when I had been in Highschool. Crushing over Arjun, getting all worked up and flustered when he was within my sight. But the only difference was we weren't in Highschool anymore and it wasn't just a stupid crush. I was in love with that guy. Even after everything that has gone upside down I couldn't hate him.

Arjun had already made himself comfortable on the chair previously occupied by Ryan, even before I could run away. I sat there stiff looking at the ground not knowing how to start the conversation. A few seconds passed in silence before Arjun cleared his throat, making me look up at him -

"Do you hate me Pooja?", his voice low. I sense his tension even though he appeared to be calm.

I decide to speak my heart out. Afterall this was a do or die situation. "Hate is a strong word. If you ask if I'm angry? Yes. But hate? No. Also I wouldn't be sitting here if I hated you."

A small smile graces his face and for the first time in years I take a proper look at his face. There were dark circles and eyes bags under his eyes. There were a few stray white hairs near to his temples. His face had all together aged but what didn't change was the way he looked at me. The same way during our last days at the island.

"I'm sorry. I know this two words would never heal the pain I caused you. But I wanted the best for you. And I was a fool to believe it would only be possible if I let you go.", he looks away but I could see the pain in his eyes.

"You are right. But you weren't just a fool. You were stupid as well as an idiot!", I couldn't hide the smile that broke out on my face.

We both sit in silence, which was no longer uncomfortable, for a few minutes before he again breaks it -

"A lot has changed isn't it?", his eyes trained on Esha where she was playing with other kids in the family.

"Yeah!", I say silently and nod. "Arjun, you don't have to speak if you aren't comfortable. But I....I need answers Arjun. There is just so many things going on in my head and I don't know what to do? If......if we are going to work this out, whatever is between us, I want to know everything. Being from what has happened with you and Renuka."

Arjun lets out a deep sigh and looks deep into my eyes, before he starts.......

"Believe it or not, I really want you back in my life. And I guess I'll have to start from where we left out. That day whatever I said, I know I would never be able to take them back, but still, I never meant them.", he looks at the ground, as if he couldn't bear to look at me anymore, taking a deep breathe before continuing...

"When we came back from the islands, Remya took me to meet Renuka. I was hell bent on avoiding her, but what I didn't expect was her to be pregnant. She made it clear to hurt you if I had chosen you above everything. Not just you but even the unborn child.", I was shocked. I expected Renuka to be cruel, but not to the extent of thinking to harm an unborn baby and not to mention her own child.

"After you left, or rather you could say I made you leave, I had no choice but to bring her here. I wanted to keep an eye on her, afterall I didn't expect her to stick to her promise of leaving the baby unharmed. Every single person from kids to elders hated me, for bringing her home and even more for going behind your and the family's back.", he lets out a dry chuckle as if he was reminiscing a memory. "They literally stopped talking to me, as for Ma and Dad, I'm dead to them."

"Renuka was a manipulative bitch. My family started falling apart. My cousins, uncles and aunts everyone started leaving one by one. The once happy family was filled with shouts and fights. By the time Renuka went into labour it was only Ma, Dad, Ajay, Megha, Varun, Tani, Trisha and me in this huge house."

"You might have already noticed only a few family members missing. It's just that everyone that left is coming back for Tani's and Trisha's engagement. I have no idea if they would leave again or not. But I have done all that I could do. Hopefully they'll stay back.", he says looking at the other end of the backyard where the elders family were gathered and sharing laughs.

His eyes strays back towards the kids playing, "You see that boy, playing with Varun and Esha, that.......that's my son, Kiran.", his eyes were soft as he looked at his son with love. I didn't know why I didn't notice the kid before, but there were a lot of kids here, children of Arjun's cousins, around Kiran's age. Still....he was a splitting copy of his father expect he had his mother's thin lips and honey coloured eyes.

A small smile lights up my face as I see Kiran helping Esha with the sand they were playing. They would make great siblings. Just then, Arjun turns back to me and looks at my face, trying assess my reaction. I raise my eyebrow at him, to which he just chuckles and continue -

"She was shit when it came to taking care of kids. There were one too many times when she would try to take out her anger at me on the baby. Sometimes leaving him in the bath for hours, when I wouldn't dare to attend to her phone calls. Forgetting, as she says, to feed him. Even slapping and beating the kid when he wouldn't stop crying.", my eyes looks at the child and something pulls in my heart when he innocently smiles at me as our eyes lock. That woman better doesn't cross her path with me.

"To an extent you could blame me too for the child's sufferings.", he started as if he was reading my mind. "I would mostly drown myself in work and alcohol during that time. I couldn't just sit with that woman in the same room for more than a few seconds when I was sober. And tried my best to avoid any chances of being left with my child. He was always a reminder of what I lost in my life. I'm not proud of it Pooja. Fuck! I even hate myself even more for it.", tears spilled out of his eyes as he looked away from me. I myself felt the pain in his words. I slowly hold both of his hands in palm and give it a reassuring squeeze.

He tries to faintly smile back and continued, "Even though others had already left us out of the picture, Ma and Megha would always try to be there for my baby. But even they had their limits, because Renuka would start acting like a bitch to them. Finally when everything started to slip through their fingers Ajay literally locked me in a room for throwing in a few punches and kicks on me and then lecturing me."

"He made me, or rather used me, to bribe Renuka into singing her rights off on the child for a life time worth of money. And as soon as she had the amount in her bank account she left the house, without leaving a trace of her being here, leaving back the child. Megha started helping me with bringing up my child. Though Ma would too take care of him, she still never spoke to me or even acknowledge my presence even when in the same room."

"Even before Renuka left, I had started my search for you. I wanted to know if you were safe. If you were happy without me. But when she left, never to return, I wanted you back here, with me, by my side. But your dad had made sure to clear your traces.", he said with a sour smile.

We sat there for a few minutes in silence. Neither of us looking at each other. When he understood I wasn't going to speak any time soon, he took hold of my hand in his and stood on the ground on his knees. I could feel his eyes boring into my face. With one hand he cupped my cheeks making me look at him, into his eyes.

"It might have taken me three f*king years to find you, but I never stopped loving you, Kitten. And I will never stop, even if you want it or not."

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