It's been more than three years since she left me.

You made her leave idiot.

My concise jabs at me. That was the truth, I made her leave. But only for good, because the longer she had stayed, the more she would have been hurt.

I regret very single word I told her that night, not that I meant any of it.

I drown my glass of scotch and set it on the tea table and look at her photo. Her hair dishevelled, but face bright with happiness as she fed me a piece of cake. It was one from the islands on her birthday celebration. Murthy uncle had the vedios and photos made which I asked him to send me the very next day I came back from island.

It was my favourite photo of us. She looked so happy and I was determined to keep it that way, already choosing her to be my better half. But that was I until I saw Remya back home. Being one of my favourite cousins, I did have a soft spot for her. But with her came Renuka, the one person I had decided to avoid after coming back home.

I knew it would be hard to push Renuka off my back, but I never thought it would cost me love of my life, my Pooja.

The day we arrived home Remya, telling me there was something exciting she wanted to show me, had taken me to Renuka. I shouldn't have been surprised, since they were best friends since college. But what surprised me was Renuka being pregnant. To say that I was shell shoked was an understatement. Just when I wanted to be a husband she wished, to Pooja, my past had to come back bitting my ass.

The baby Renuka was carrying was mine, conceived after our Paris trip. Renuka was clear in demanding she wanted Pooja out of my life. And if I had known about Renuka being pregnant with my baby, before Ma had send me to the islands with Pooja, obviously I would have agreed to Renuka's demand in a heartbeat. But things had changed and I was clear of my feelings. What I felt for Renuka was no where near what I felt for Pooja.

When I refused she threatened me, telling she would abort the baby. It was either the unborn child or Pooja. Even if I choose Pooja, Renuka made it obvious to hurt her.

And it was then I started ignoring Pooja. Everytime I had to turn my face away or act like I didn't care, I was hurting myself more than her. To stop myself from running and taking Pooja in my arms or kiss her senseless, I drowned myself in alcohol or took sleeping pills so as to be out of this world before she came to our room.

Then came Megha's accident. I was standing right outside, all the while Pooja was confronting Remya. But again just to save Pooja I had to take the wrong side. Because I knew, if my sweet cousin was able to harm a pregnant woman then her bestfriend wouldn't sit silently. Renuka was much more cruel than Remya.

I made Pooja go, hoping that she would finally find happiness, that I wasn't able to give her and also sure, that Ma would always be there for her.

I drown the remaining of the bottle directly not bothering with the glass and fall into sleep thinking about Pooja.

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The house was bustling in preparation for welcoming the guests. Ma and Megha were in the lead commanding like pro's. One of the guest houses had been prepared for their stay.

I never thought Pooja would actually help us planning Tani's and Trisha's engagement and marriage. I don't know why she bought my excuse of six months and letting her plan every single detail. Though surely enough both my sisters wanted her to be there for their ceremonies and to plan them, I had exaggerated it a bit to get her attention. I wanted her to know before hand, that I was the one who asked for her, so that she did not blindly accept, thinking it was just another one of her client with ridiculous demands.

As expected Pooja had been reluctant. She hadn't agreed to stay here at first, demanding she and her team would go with a hotel but she had eventually agreed. If I can't make her happy, I atleast want to see her happy from far. And obviously a small part of me was wishing for a second chance. If she was to stay at a hotel how was I going to gain it.

The security guard inform us about her arrival. Ma, Megha and my sisters step out to the front of the house along with me, to see an open jeep and car drive through. I haven't seen her since that day and now my heart was jumping out of its cage and I was feeling light headed, just by thinking I would be actually seeing her.

I don't recognise the girls driving the jeep, till she stops it right in front of us.

Pooja.

She.....she's changed.

Her once black hair, which she most of the time left open, the way I liked, was now a shade of brown with golden mix and tied into a bun on top of her head. Her face blank, not even a smudge of eyeliner. Her ears were lined with a number of earrings and studs, covering the edge completely. She also wore a small nose ring The girl who once wore only sarees or salwars was now in a jeans and a sleeveless top that only reached till her belly button. And not to mention those glasses.

She looked f*king hot.

No not hot, she looks sexy.

I wasn't the only person stunned, the others with me were left with open mouths. I clear my throat just to revive them. Pooja and her companion gets down from the jeep as well as the doors of the car behind them opens and three men step out, one carrying a cute little girl.

I can see Pooja talking to them, her expression stern, probably bossing them. A chuckle escapes my throat and that suddenly catches attention of Ma who was standing next to me. I look back at her and she suddenly covers her amused expression with a blank one, but not before I noticed.

Since that day, Ma hadn't spoken to me or as much as acknowledge me. I wish I could say I was fine with that, but I am not.

The guy holding the little girl comes to stand next to Pooja with his one hand on her back as he gives her the girl. His eyes roams and finally land on me, and he smirks. I ball my fist as I suddenly feel a wave of anger hit me.

The group comes towards us, but my eyes doesn't move from the guy or his hands, not till I hear Pooja's voice.

"Good afternoon, Mr.Kashyap.", her tone formal, but just as sweet as I can remember, she hold out her free hand for a shake.

"Good afternoon, Mrs.Kashyap.", my tone matching hers but with a smile. Heat rises up her cheeks and she clears her throat, turning towards Ma and hugs her.

Awww, no hug for you....

My stupid mind mocks me and I shut him out. I didn't want her to hug me, her blush and the pendant necklace around lying on her neck was enough to give me what I had been lacking.

Hope.

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The hope I had was trickling away slowly, seeing how cosy Pooja was with the guy, whose name I learned to be Ryan. The tea was over and everyone were in the backyard helping the guests to settle in while I was back in my room, sitting in the balcony. My laptop was open and sitting in front of me, while my eyes were waiting to catch a glimpse of Pooja.

The little girl began crying and Pooja walked with her towards the house. I suddenly rush outside and see her walk towards Ma's room. I debate with myself whether I should try talking to her or not. There was nothing to loose if I try, so why not.

With that I walk to downstairs and knock on the door and enter, not waiting for her ........

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