It had been a week since Susan had moved in with Amal. A shy and friendly woman, Amal had been a great support and with each passing day a companion. Yousef was easily comfortable in Amal's presence. She adored babies and young children and it was natural for her to mind Yousef when Susan was busy such as in a shower or searching for jobs online. After all, Amal had two nieces whom she had babysit countless time. Her eyes would sparkle and a lingering smile on her lips whenever Amal spoke of her nieces. Susan was grateful to God for finding Amal at the right time, when she was low spiritually, emotionally and even financially. Amal had come to Susan's life as a God sent gift and blessing – ready to help her with any problems.

Tonight was the first night Susan was all alone as Amal had been invited at a wedding reception party of a friends. Alone, in this new house Susan had ample time to think hard on her life. She couldn't take advantage of Amal's hospitable personality. She had to find a job soon and save enough money to rent a small flat even a studio flat will do. She had also applied for the council homes but knowing the Dublin City Council it will take months before she get any response.

Glancing at her sleeping son, her thoughts went to more poignant issues. Daud. Did he even realize they were not in the apartment anymore? Did he miss them? Ok well not her, but at least Yousef. His eyes would always lit up when seeing his son and he would spend hours playing with him. Will he not miss that bond?

She sighed, hugging the night robe more tightly around her, she walked to the window. What did the future held? Will she ever find happiness? For now, it was the question of survival. She had to find a job and start earning enough to bring food on the plate for her son and herself. In honesty, she didn't care about herself as long as Yousef was fed and taken care well.

The glaring light of the headlights on the quiet street distracted her and when the car stopped in front of the house, Susan smiled as the sight of Amal donned in fancy Pakistani dress rushed to the house door. Susan loved Amal's company and she would love to hear about the wedding party.

Quiet as a busy mouse, Susan padded her way downstairs to the foyer. Her shadow was thrown over Amal, who exclaimed in fright, "You scared me Susan," she placed her hand on her chest where her heart was.

Smiling sheepishly, "Sorry."

Amal shook her head, controlling her erratic heartbeat, "It's okay. Its just I thought you were asleep."

"I don't know I couldn't knowing you were still out."

Amal smile grew, "That's very sweet of you to look out for me."

One eyebrow rose inquisitively, Susan asked, "So how was it?"

"Magical. It was as if a scene out of a fairy tale." Amal sighed, "The bride and groom weren't even able to take their eyes off each other."

Susan lips twitched in delight, "That's wonderful. A happy couple then?"

"Yes indeed." Amal slumped on the living room sofa and started unpinning her hijab.

"Soon you will get married too." Susan teased.

Amal's hands stilled on top of her head as she was dragging a pin out of the hijab, eyes lowered she whispered so quietly, was it not for the house being silent Susan would have never deciphered, "No man would want to marry me."

Susan's eyebrows creased, "I should be saying that, being a single Mom, no man would be interested to marry me and take the burden of Yousef. But you are a beautiful single woman."

Unfolding the hijab from her head, Amal murmured, "Looks can be deceiving Susan. For one to marry one needs to be whole. I am not. I am damaged."

Stunned, Susan was speechless. And this is why she was able to connect easily with Amal. They were both damaged souls finding solace in this harsh world. But deep down there was a small lantern of light flaming in frail hope. Perhaps, they will find their happiness. And as she spent time with Amal, she did learn that indeed Allah loved His creations much more than one's mother.

Susan shook her head, "Don't say that. Allah has written your happy ending with someone. All you have to do is wait for him. He will come at the right time."

Dismal eyes penetrated hers, "I can say the same about you."

That night, the two new friends prayed for each other's happiness. Neither knowing that happiness was only steps away. But each step was a million miles away...

****

The Siddique family was sitting at the breakfast table sharing the details and experiences of the last night valima event. Everyone was happily chatting except the newly wedded couple. Nawal had her head bowed down to the plate as she concentrated on cutting her omelette in precision. While Salman sitting beside her was oblivious to his surroundings eating his meal with zealous attitude after being in gym for two hours early in the morning.

Seema frowned gazing at her son and daughter in law. They were content together last night and she had believed that all animosity between them had faded away. She took a big gulp of her orange juice, when will these two learn to live in harmony? It seemed yet again she will have to step in between them.

Clearing her throat, Seema addressed the couple, "Salman so what have you decided where to take Nawal for a few days?"

Seema's question arrested Salman in the act of lifting his tea mug. He gently placed it back on the table and nonchalantly replied, "We are not going anywhere. I have too much work right now."

Seema's frown deepened, "I am sure you can take few days off. Even two days break on the weekend will suffice."

Shaking his head curtly, Salman said imperturbably "No Ammi not now. Maybe later sometime." This time he meaningful looked at his mother indicating this was the end of discussion.

He was well aware that Nawal would have loved going out for a holiday but he was in no mood to please her when she wasn't ready to understand him. Since last night, they hadn't bothered to speak each other. Both had been ignoring their spouse as if the other was a parasite needed to stay away from.

Uncomfortably, Seema's eyes shifted to Nawal. Her head was still lowered and her eyelids hid her expressive eyes. Nawal concealed the whirlwind of emotions that were running through her mind and her heart. The lack of Salman's enthusiasm to take her anywhere for just a couple of days had hit her hard. Biting her lower lip and the grip on her butter knife increased, heart-breaking memories flooded back of another man. The contents of the plate blurred as her eyes moistened. His eagerness to please, his enthusiasm to take her places and most of all his acceptance of who she was all rushed back making it difficult for her to swallow the reminiscent of the food in her mouth down her sudden dried throat.

Unable to control her haywire emotions, she pushed back the chair in a jerk and without meeting anyone's eyes, she murmured, "Excuse me."

Flabbergasted, Seema helplessly watched Nawal rushed out of the room. Gritting her teeth, she turned to her indifferent son, "Did you even bother to ask her before making this decision?"

"Mom I am very busy. She is my wife she should understand I am not there to entertain her all the time. She should be supporting me in my career." Salman reasoned.

"When you will not support her and understand her, how do you expect her to do the same for you? This marriage was your choice." She pointed the finger at him, "You better work hard to make it work."

Muhammad gently touched his seething wife's arm, "Simmi jaan, give him time. He will learn to communicate with Nawal."

The warmth of Muhammad's hand on her arm brought down Seema's anger but she wasn't done, "Next time before you announce your decision consult with your wife first."

Salman was slowly getting fed up how his mother was always on his back ready to defend her niece. He heaved hard, why did he always make up with his wife?

****

Nawal literally ran out of the dining room and went up her bedroom. Locking herself, in the ensuite bathroom she let tears trickle down as the onslaught of memories attacked her from all directions.

But dreams didn't always come true. Her palm covered her mouth to stifle a sob. Teeth sinking into the flesh of the palm. The sting on her hand was nothing compared to the slash of her heart. No matter how much she tried, her thoughts always drifted back to Daud. In those four months, she had lived the moments of her happiness and most of all she had tasted love. She doubted she would ever fall in love again. Pursing her lips, no one accepted her. Especially Salman.

There was a light knock on the door, "Nawal?"

Pressing her lips together, tears flooded down her cheeks, she scurried to the bathroom sink and splashed cold water on her face. She was not showing him that he can easily break her down.

Guilt was eating Salman standing outside the bathroom. Why did he readily refused for a few days break? He should have asked her. But every time they argued, she would hit a nerve in him and he would be obliterated to reason.

He waited patiently for a few minutes and the door creaked opened. Her eyes downcast, the tip of the nose was red and her cheeks flushed. His guilt increased tenfold. She had been crying.

"Nawal listen, about going--" he stepped closer.

Fierce bloodshot eyes met his, "You made yourself clear downstairs. Don't act like you care."

She squeezed her way out of the room leaving a very defeated man with his hunched shoulders and helpless expression. With each passing day, he was learning that winning her over was not as easy as he had presumed.

It may take time, what he feared the most is that it may take a life time.

****

A tall broad man stood facing the great River Liffey clutching the steel barricade of the balcony in his apartment. The early morning cool breeze kissing his skin and flirting with his hair. A cigarette between his fingers, his blue eyes scanning the heavy early morning rush. There were cars stuck bumper to bumper on the city centre roads. Pedestrians paddled their way through the sea of people. He was unaware of the woman screaming below or the man running breathlessly to catch the yellow and blue Dublin bus. His eyes only saw one face, his ears heard only one laughter. He could still taste her sweet lips or feel the silkiness of her skin on his fingertips. He missed her terribly. She was within him as the blood in his veins. In just four months, Nawal had become an essential part of Daud. Now with each passing day, his heart was restless.

Bringing the cigarette to his lips, he inhaled deeply flaming the tip of it. He had lost count of the cigarettes he had been smoking. It was as if the smoke could erase the cracks in his heart. Well at least build a screen over his heart so no one will be able to trample it again. It was her valima last night, a night he had spent tossing and turning in blazing anger. But by morning, the sunrise brought in a promise.

All was not lost.

He was a fighter.

He will fight till his last breath.

His lips ends slightly curved as he blew the smoke out to the bright sunny day, Salman, you may have won the battle but I will win the war.

****

That afternoon was the first day that Nawal was helping in the kitchen, cooking alongside her mother in law, Seema. She was awfully quiet and it was unnerving Seema a lot. After the unsuccessful attempt in bringing some sense in her son, Seema sought to do the same with Nawal.

Seema was stirring the pot of stir fry vegetables when she cautiously spoke, "You know Nawal, when I started my married life I wasn't very happy."

Lost in her thoughts, Nawal eyebrows knotted, she looked up from the chopping board where she was cutting the salad.

"I didn't like your khalu much. I was young just like you. There were ...." She paused thinking of a suitable word, "reasons I had agreed to the marriage. But that didn't mean I happily accepted."

Seema side glanced at her daughter in law, seeing her intrigued she continued, "I had no other choice. I resented at the start but I got hurt in the process. It was no one's loss but mine. And then I started giving him a chance. Giving our marriage a chance." Her pleading eyes met Nawal's "I don't agree with Salman nor am I defending his actions. All I ask you beti is give your marriage a chance. It will take time. You will argue, fight and what not. But I pray in the end you find happiness among yourselves."

Staring at her khala silently, the knife slid from Nawal's finger onto the chopping board, "I am trying my best khala but I am not made of stone. He ...he..." she swallowed unable to carry on. When Seema nodded in encouragement, Nawal expressed her feelings, "I am not looking for happiness or love. All I want is an understanding relationship, khala. Is that difficult to ask out of him?"

"No of course it is not. He should be more understanding. I will speak to him about this again, beti. But I request you think of what I have said to you."

Nawal nodded curtly but inwardly she cringed.

Why does everyone expect her to mould to this new relationship? She was forced into this union. It was HIS CHOICE. He should be trying hard. At times, she felt she was a prized possession that he was seeking. Now that she was named his wife, he didn't care what her feelings were about.

But she was delicate than a porcelain doll – one push and she will break. Break into countless pieces.

****

The sight of Nawal greeted him when he sauntered in their room that evening after work. She was standing in front of the opened closet and setting her folded clothes. He had regretted all day of his behaviour and just like last time he was ready to forego his anger and make the first move.

"Assalam u alaikum," he said in his husky voice grabbing her attention.

She whirled around and faced him, "Walaikum salaam" she murmured.

Sinking on the bed, he ran his fingers through his hair, "Nawal, let's talk this out. We keep playing yo-yo in our relationship. One minute I feel everything is fine and the next minute nothing is alright."

"It's your fault," she said haughtily crossing her arms over her chest.

He narrowed his eyes, "Oh really? It takes two to tango babe."

"In this relationship you are the stubborn one with a big ego head."

He stood up and stalked her, she stepped backwards evading being close to him.

"You have no ego?" he arched an eyebrow.

She took the last step backwards, her body leaning against the wall. She shook her head, not faltering his eye contact.

His hand splayed on the wall beside her head, "You know what I love about you?"

Her eyes widened. Did he just say love? Unable to speak, she shook her head.

"You are a spitfire and I am ready to burn in it."

His head lowered, sharp ebony eyes captive her soft brown orbs. His lips hairsbreadth away from hers, "Do you want to burn in this fire with me, Nawal?"