"Wonderfully Made" is a song linked above! When there is an " *" in the story, listen to it!!

Arlan's Point Of View

I summoned my men to the ramp of my private jet as I stood beside its opening. Nate begrudgingly obliged, the last one in line. Smokey hues of orange suffused the early morning sunrise, counterbalancing the sleek and dark mien of our affairs. I adjust my cobalt blazer.

"Gentleman, it's a beautiful day to exploit some fuckers."

My suited men laughed in amusement. Nate, on the other hand, deadpanned. He passed me by with his navy blue hoodie slouched over his head and I gave a smug smirk towards him.

Once we comfortably settled into the jet, I instructed the pilot to take off. The inside was minimalist, with an all black exterior to my liking. I liked being encased in darkness.

I took off my Aviators and perused to the back where a pretty flight attendant was filling scotch glasses. As we cruised to an ascendance into the air, I sat into a cushioned seat in the back where my men gathered around a small table. I was already missing Aurora, and wished I had her on my lap.

It had been a while since I'd traveled anywhere and being on a plane again felt odd. I'd feel much more at ease if she were here, snuggling next to me. Maybe I'd even take her to the bathroom to suck my dick, that would surely relax the tension in my body. I hoped and preyed she'd be on her best behavior and not do anything stupid with me gone. Like talk to boys. Or hang out with them. Would she do that? I doubt it. But the thought alone sent a spike of rage through my blood stream. I quickly knocked back my drink. The tart, cherry flavor and comforting burn of the liquor matched with the striking sunrise airplane view was leisurely. I took in the view, amused, and watched the buildings grow smaller and smaller.

"What, no alcohol?" I prod at Nate who had his cheeks in his palms and looked asleep. He opened his eyes at my voice. "You seemed to be perfectly fine priming my girlfriend with drinks."

Nate's hands shuffle clumsily into his hoodie sleeves as he covers his cheeks again, glaring at me.

"I didn't give Aurora any drinks, and I don't drink."

"Oh, no? Why not?" I tease. "You're a young man. Even though you don't act like it."

"And what would that entail, acting like a 'young man'? Kidnapping someone?" Nate grumbled with a cock of his head.

"Grouchy, are we?" I taunted. My eyes smoldered him for a moment, studying him.

I wasn't going to let him know I knew he told Aurora of my debt. Not just yet. I'd let him relax.

For now.

In fact, I'd really help him relax.

I took it upon myself to lift the scotch bottle and fill an empty glass. As the liquid finished pouring, I set the bottle down and passed the glass to Nate. He eyed it wearily, then met my gaze. I grinned unsuspectedly.

"Have a drink with me, Nathaniel."

"It's six AM."

"And it's one PM in Moscow," I chirped reasonably. "One drink isn't going to have you dizzy, Nate."

From his study of the glass his eyes instantly flicked to mine. He wasn't used to me calling him by his preferred shortened name, but I could tell something flickered in him. He felt more comfortable. And sure enough, he took the glass and hesitantly took a sip.

"You know, you weren't always like this," I leaned back and crossed my arms. His eyes watched me over the rim of his glass as he drank. "You used to go out to the bars with us...you were quite a rowdy seventeen year old," I recalled the nostalgia.

Nate lowered his glass. With a lick to his liquor coated lips, he formed his mouth to speak when I beat him to it.

"God, you even got us kicked out one time. Remember that? You had broke so many glasses they were pushing us onto the street before it was even midnight."

His guilty eyes glanced towards the window.

"I have a set of morals now."

I hardened my exterior with a stone cold glance at him. It didn't take seconds for him to squirm against his seat under the smolder of my heated gaze. His eyes were back on the window.

Morals?

We were mafia men, we didn't know that word. What in the hell was he going on about?

"Is that right?" I provoke.

" I shouldn't have been sneaking into those clubs," Nate curtly mumbled.

"Ah, but you did," I smirked, leaning forward onto my knees. "You were dancing on the tables, you had all the women flocking to you, dancing all over you. And you loved it."

"It was a distraction," There was embarrassment lingered in Nate's voice. He rose the glass back to his lips, already half-way done with it, eyes glued to the window.

"You're the most tense person I know, and I'm the boss," I narrow my eyes at him. "How are you constantly more stressed than me? You're gonna want to retire before you're even thirty."

He gave me an annoyed glare.

"I'm just saying," I shrugged and mumbled, lifting my own glass. "Jake would've been proud."

Nate froze from reaching for his glass and I could see the hair raise on his arm as it trembled. He recoiled back, his hands finding his hood and adjusting it further over his head. He wanted to shield himself as much as possible. His head tossed to the side as he watched the moving clouds in the window, and my eyes followed the clouds too...moving, moving, moving...

October 20th, 2010

(tw: excessive exercise)

"Keep moving!"

Exhaustion was the only coherent feeling I could feel as I ran on the treadmill. Sweat coated my face which I wiped with the back of my hand. There were new rolls of sweat in just moments after on my forehead and I groaned in aggravation. My arms red with pure exhaustion, skull pounding with an aching headache. I just couldn't deal with the heat anymore. I had exerted myself to the point of needing an inhaler, my heated legs a blur on the treadmill beneath me. My arms swung at my side as a a line of sweat ran down my neck. My eyes squeezed shut and I groaned again breathlessly.

"You never know when you're going to have to run, Arlan," Jake warned me and my eyes popped open.

The man I thought to be a God stood in front of the treadmill, looking right at me, his eyes a complex, stormy grey and Olympic body a stoic demeanor. He was sharp, intelligent, he ran fast and strategized even faster. His legendary Obsidian Wrath leader dog tag necklace on his neck.

"I can't," I panted. "I can't, Jake, it's been two hours,"-

"You can, and you will," He commanded agressively. "You're in survival mode, Arlan - from the moment you wake, through every second of the day, until when you fall asleep. You need to be ready to sprint like this at any moment."

My lungs were beginning to squeeze. Maybe I didn't want this. And I think he could see it on my face.

"Alright, take a break," He mumbled, rubbing his forehead slightly.

With a trembling hand, I hit the stop button. As the treadmill slowed to a stillness, I felt relief, body feeling like utter Jello. He guided my hands and my knees instantly weakened. Jake brought me to the couch, sitting me next to him.

"You're getting better," He praised, handing me a water bottle.

I unscrewed the cap eagerly and downed the water, it soothing the rough dryness in my throat. It was empty in nearly seconds.

"Soon you'll be able to run with the top dogs, like me," He winked.

I tossed the empty plastic bottle to the floor and exhaled dramatically, my chest still heaving.

"You know, I remember when you first got here," Jake said nostalgically. "You could barely run an hour, I told you, you could do it. And now look at you, you're running two."

"When am I gonna be able to go to school?" I whined softly, squirming on the couch. "You promised I could go to middle school and it never happened. Now I'm about to start high school. I wanna meet girls."

A smug chuckle rumbled from Jake's chest, he shook his head.

"Arlan, I've told you so many times - you don't need school."

"But you let Nate go to school."

Jake leaned, whispering,

"Because Nate's not special like you, Arlan."

My eyes widened slightly. Was I really that special?

"He's intelligent, but for school, not crimes, and not nearly as physically capable as you. And he's far more faint hearted than you, so he needs more time away from this scene. But you...Obsidian Wrath is all you need. We are your family," Jake leaned forward, his large hand cupping my shoulder. I met his eyes with a glowering stare as he looked sincerely at me, "we are your everything."

I gave him an uneasy look, unsure if I truly was convinced at what he was saying.

"Besides, if you need someone your age to play with, there's Nate," He shrugged a shoulder.

I looked over in the home gym to see Nate on his knees across from us. With tiny rectangle shaped glasses on his face, he was building a toy robot. I winced a bit and shook my head, looking back to Jake.

"No way," I whispered. "He's too nerdy. I want people to help me kick dirt at the nerds."

"Believe me, buddy - there will be way more exciting people to kick once you get more into the mafia. But I'll tell you what, you know where you can meet girls one day?"

Jake slipped away and into a closet in the home gym. I leaned up and twisted to watch him as he unlatched a lock and opened it. When he returned, my eyes widened in wonder. When he sat next to me, he reached the item forward.

"At a bar," He answered, tapping his fingers along the bottle of Jack Daniels. "Come on, let's have a sip," Jake got to opening it.

Feeling uncomfortable, I shook my head.

"Jake, I'm only fourteen."

"So? It's okay. I'm your big brother, Arlan, you're safe with me."

A sort of melting feeling happened in my chest in one particular organ - my heart. It was so nice to feel protected, safe, looked after. I anxiously reached forward and took the bottle. Looking to him once more for a confirmation it was okay, he nodded. And then, I tipped the bottle back and took my first sip of alcohol.

The dry spice and smoky taste burned my throat as I tore the bottle away, sputtering cough after cough. I should've sipped it much more slowly rather than a gulp. What was I thinking?! It wasn't water.

"Thatta boy!" Jake said proudly, harshly patting my back. He took the bottle back from me and easily gulped down several gulps of the whiskey. Wiping the back of his mouth, he set the bottle on the floor.

"Jake, I finished my robot!" Nate proudly called from afar, shaking it in the air. Only Jake ignored it, his eyes on mine.

"See this?" He questioned, lifting his dog tag and staring at me intensley.

I nodded, eyes marveling at the engrained letters 'Obsidian Wrath Boss' on the gold dog tag.

"This could be yours one day, if you ever became the leader. One day my legs will be shot and yours will be as fast as mine are now. This could be around your neck."

I wondered how legitimate that promise was. Jake had promised a lot of things - like me starting school, and reaching out to see if any family members would take me in. None of those things ever happened.

"But just like drinking before the legal age," Jake snickered, "You have to do a lot of bad shit. Do you know what morals are?"

I shook my head innocently. How would I? I had never been in school, I didn't know what half the words I heard meant.

"Morals, it means doing good, being a good person, having a good heart. You can't do any of that shit."

"None of that...shit," I repeated.

He smirked, nudging my chin up with his knuckle.

"Exactly. But do the opposite, Arlan...become a leader, guide your people, and you could have this," He raised the dog tag necklace. "Forget the morals and be a risky motherfucker, see where it gets you - it's probably more thrilling than anything else in the world."

Present day

"But it's true?" I ask.

Nate's chocolate eyes flick to mine, confused. I clarify.

"It's true that you woke up one day and the switch flipped, you had this holy awakening and now you have a moral compass?"

He averted my gaze as he felt mocked, but my eyes locked on him was unrelenting, studying the man across from me. It was humorous, to be honest - the whole thing. Morals. What morals did Obsidian Wrath men have? We were trained to be criminal since we were children. We've done unthinkable, unfathomable shit. Nate was forever a stained human, just like me.

"Yes," He mumbled quietly. "I know I'm not a perfect man, I've made mistakes. But I've come to terms and accepted that it's because it was out of my hands, I was a child and coerced into it. Now that I'm a functioning adult deciding things for myself, I decide what kind of person I want to be. And that's a person with morals. Obviously something you wouldn't understand."

"Hm," was my quiet reply.

I had finished another glass and poured him one, but he simply glanced at it in front of him and back towards the window. His eyes seemed to hold no bitterness, but a forlorn loathing. And the further away from the ground and higher into the clouds we were, it grew. He hated being forced on this trip, and the more I could visibly see it in his eyes, the more satisfied I felt.

"So you fucked the maid?" I provoked.

A frantic gasp slipped from him as he turned to me wide-eyed. I chuckled heartily in sheer amusement.

"I don't care," I shrugged a shoulder. "The women that work for us are there for our enjoyment."

"Stop it," Nate grumbled, cheeks growing red.

"So you fucked her?"

"No!" He growled defiantly, his eyes daggering death glares.

"Oh," I concluded, frowning. I shrugged again, swirling my glass. "I thought you liked her," I took a sip.

His brows slewed together tightly in confusion.

"I see the way you look at her," I explained. "I know what sexual attraction looks like, Nate. I'm a human being. So you like her, or not?"

"How can you form relationships in a house like ours?" Nate frustratedly retorted, as if his liking of her wouldn't even matter. His fingers picked at his hoodie sleeves. "And it's not of your business if we had sex."

"Aurora and I have a relationship."

Nate sent me a blank glare.

"I just want to make sure you did it safely," A smirk twitched its ways up to my lips. "You deserve to get laid, maybe you'd be less up tight."

"Can you stop?" Nate yelled exasperatedly. "Enough, okay? We didn't do it, enough. And stop acting like you're some older brother of sorts, you and I don't have talks like this. And I don't want to start now."

"Ouch," I feigned heart while gently touching my chest. "You're putting daggers right into my heart."

"Yeah, well with the way you drink you'd probably be too numb to feel it, anyway," Nate retorted.

With an amused smirk, I rolled my jaw, licking my bottom lip.

"You're quite correct with that one. I don't feel anything. But forgive me for simply having interest about your life and reaching out to you."

"And excuse me for being on edge and not trusting you actually care. You just provoke me."

"You don't think I care?" I echoed. "And you don't trust me?"

"No."

"Well," I feigned a pout, shrugging. "I guess that's too bad. If we can't have this emotionally connected deep talk, Nathaniel, then I'll promise you one thing of today."

A gulp skid down his throat as he wearily looked at me. I grinned gently, innocently at him.

"Entertainment."

I just didn't clarify that the person being entertained would be me.

***

Aurora's Point Of View

Arlan had one of his men, Xavier, drive me to school since Nate and him were off to Russia. I did not even have the usual comfort of my morning car rides with Nate. I grew to seek safety in our routine, Nate usually gave me a mini pep talk or therapy session in whatever anxiety I was dealing with. Instead, I quietly rode in the back seat of Xavier's Cadillac alone.

"Can you play this?" I had quietly implored from the backseat, reaching forward Beck's CD. I wanted to know what the rest of the tracklist was. "Track two," I softly clarified.

Xavier opened the CD compartment and slid it in. I nervously exhaled and held my hands between my thighs, rocking a bit, anticipating the music. I hear the soft strumming of acoustic guitar.

"You actually ask about my music - no one even thinks to ask about my lyrics, or any of that stuff. I actually look at my songs like, wow, these might actually be worth something, for the first time, because you gave me the push for that."

I try to push the memories of the Fall Back out of my head and lean forward to see the song title. "Wonderfully Made" By Joel Ansett. I listen as the male singer begins the song... *

' I have troubles sleeping when you're sleeping next to me

Keep myself awake because you're better than my dreams

And as much as I'd like to get some sleep,

I'd rather whisper in your ear, the truth I want you so to hear

Tears smart my eyes as my heart clenches slightly.

'You are, you are

Wonderfully made, wonderfully madeYou are, you are

Wonderfully made, wonderfully made'

I remember his words at the Fall Back:

"I like you, Aurora. You're adorable, you're kind, you have the absolute most caring heart I've ever come across. And you make me feel seen."

Tears roll down my face in fast successions and I quickly wipe them away, sniffling silently. As we pull up to the college, I take the CD back. I thank Xavier and quickly shut the door, arriving to college.

'And once you've heard a lie

So many times it gets to hard to deny, hard to erase it

Unless there's a truth to replace

Let's replace it now'

You are, you are

Wonderfully made, wonderfully made'

I kept a quiet composition Monday morning sulking onto the college campus. My body merely floated through the outdoor picnic tables alone with no desire to be here. The air felt denser and Autumn's icy chill no longer felt thrilling, just unkind to the skin. Everything was mundane and cold. Just so cold.

'You are, you are

Wonderfully made, wonderfully made

You are, you are

Wonderfully made, wonderfully made'