Jisung was asleep on Minho's shoulder when they had arrived at the address they were sent. Was this Chan's house? He had no idea. He shook Jisung awake and found that sleepy jisung was simply one of the cutest things he had ever witnessed. He definitely wanted to see that more often.

They had walked inside, along with Hyunjin, Seungmin, and Jeongin who drove in a separate car. There seemed to be no guards standing by the huge doors, so they just walked straight into the mansion looking house. Minho had his mouth hanging open, until jisung stuck his hand out and pushed on his chin to close it. "They'll know we're not rich people." He had told him. Minho didn't exactly know who 'they' were, but he listened to Jisung anyway.

The five were walking around, not sure where the heck they were supposed to actually go, when Chan suddenly popped up in-front of them. They all stared at him for about ten seconds before realisation hit them. Minho was the first to react.

"Chan!!" He yelled engulfing him in a big hug. "You're alive."

Chan let out a small laugh, "obviously." He stated matter-of-factly.

Minho pulled away from the hug, stepping back, "you're having a funeral. How is it obvious?"

Chan gave him the 'are you serious' look. "I literally texted you before."

Minho was embarrassed now. He put his head down and everyone went quiet, before Jisung bursted out in laughter. God did he love Jisung's laugh, he smiled, his embarrassment not lasting as long as he thought.

Chan cracked a smile too, before leading them into a hallway and telling them to wait there. They didn't know what for, but they waited. And waited. And waited. Until they couldn't handle it.

Chan had left around fifteen minutes ago and he still had not returned. The group of five were impatient. Jisung spoke up and said "Hyunjin, go look around to see where he is."

Hyunjin answered with "why me!? I don't want to get caught snooping around by guards and taken to jail." Gosh that boy was dramatic sometimes.

"Why don't you go Jisung?" Jeongin had stated.

"Well- because-" Jisung had no good excuse. "Fine, I'll go." He then looked toward Minho and gave him light punches on the arm between every word he spoke "you wanna come?" He said, rather more suggestively then as a question.

Minho wanted to say no, but those eyes. Those damn eyes. "Fine I'll come."

So the two were walking around, peeking down each hallway in sight of Chan.

They walked until they finally heard voices, "-you look really hot with those clothes and that hairstyle."

Minho's jaw dropped, once again.

He knew they were a thing, seeing as how depressed Felix became when Chan had disappeared, and Chan had also briefly spoken to him about Felix. But he wasn't aware of how far they had come. And judging by the look on Jisung's face, he hadn't known anything about any relationship.

Minho leaned down to Jisungs ear and whispered, "act calm, we knew everything okay?"

Jisung didn't break eye contact from the space in the wall where he was staring in shock as he nodded to Minho's statement.

He saw Jisung take a deep breath before they calmly walked out and stepped into the hallway the other two were standing in. Jisung made the first move, "so you two are a thing huh?" Minho was next, "I can't believe you didn't tell us." He said, crossing his arms.

Minho wanted to burst out into laughter right there. The look on Felix's face was priceless. He looked as if he had just seen a ghost and had red tint sprinkled across his freckled cheeks. Chan, however, was the complete opposite, smiling as sly as ever.

Felix was silent for a little while, but jisung seemed to be glaring daggers at him, so he had tried to explain. "I- we- uh..." he cleared his throat and went to continue, but Chan had cut him off. "We are not a 'thing'." He had dropped his smile and walked away expressionless, leaving the remaining three confused.

Until Minho turned around and saw Chan's dad.

Ouch.

What was this sting Felix felt in his chest? After all of that 'I won't ever leave you again', he leaves. Felix had made brief eye contact with him just before he walked away, his expression was unreadable. There was nothing to give it away.

Did Chan really mean it when he said they weren't a thing? Felix felt embarrassed now, Chan probably was just playing with him, and yet he was treating everything nice Chan did for him as if it were sincere. He felt stupid, like a fool.

As if Chan would ever like a small, ugly, weak boy like him. As if on cue, water came to his eyes.

He hated his weak side. He wanted it to go away. It was what gave him so many disadvantages in life. He hated it!

His frustration built as his thoughts continued to raid his head. "FUCK OFF" he screamed at the top of his lungs, holding his head in between his hands. "Leave me alone..." he said in almost a whisper, just wanting a quiet mind for once. No voice telling him he's not good enough, he's not strong enough. That he needs to grow up, he needs to change, to be not so emotional, to care less for things like 'friends'. He just wanted peace, and quiet.

He dropped to his knees, tears of a mix of frustration and agony rolling down his face, leaving stinging, wet marks. 'You deserve this.' His mind told him. 'It's your fault, it's you that can't handle the pain.'

Maybe it was his fault...no, it was.

He couldn't handle it. Everything came at him like a ton of bricks, he struggled to keep up with it all. 'Your father abandoned you,' He clutched his shirt where his heart lay, 'it's because you're nothing.'

He was nothing.

He ran past Jisung, who stood in shock. He ran away from everything, once again. Until how long was he going to keep running? He didn't want to run anymore. Felix was tired, he wanted everything to stop.

He ran to his room and twisted the lock, leaning against the door for a little bit. He walked over to his balcony, tears still flowing, and simply stood. Looking into the distance.

This world was so beautiful, it had so much to give him. Yes. He just had to wait.

This is what he lived by.

He walked closer to the edge of the balcony so he could get a better view of the clear sky and the white butterflies that gave him hope.

He would too, fly one day, and he would love his life. He just had to find the very thing that could change his life.

He suddenly felt a hand snake around his stomach. "Stop" he felt whispered in his ear. "I don't like seeing you cry baby boy."

Sorry guys this was a pretty bad chapter, I'll try harder 🥺🥺

Also sorry for not updating for almost half a month :(( I haven't exactly been motivated to write lately and I've also kinda been busy with online classes and work so but I'll try my best to write when I can 🥺💓