MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE! In the Christmas spirt I decided to get the update done early. It's a bit shorter than usual but ho ho. I just wanna say, thank you so so so much for all of the votes and comments. They mean the world to me. So thank you and happy holiday's.

How did I get to this party? Why did they always turn the music up so loud? What's my name? Where do I live? Where are the rest of the pills?

Pills, dancing, drinking. A constant loop. Pills, dancing, drinking. There was something I needed to forget. I must have forgotten it. But why was it still there? Why was there something still eating away at me?

I had one name in my head. Nate. Maybe I needed to find a Nate? Maybe I needed to forget him? Should I look for him? Should I leave him?

Look for him. That was the only reasonable answer. I needed to find Nate.

It was cold. Freezing. It hurt to walk on the ground. Where did my shoes go?

"A? What's wrong?" The blonde girl seemed to be talking to me. Was that my name? A? That was a funny name. So I laughed. I laughed so hard, the girl thought u was crazy.

"Nate. I need Nate. Do you know Nate?" I asked, my voice sounded foreign to my ears.

"A, it's me Serena. What happened?" Did I know her? Was I meant to know Serena. She needed to stop spinning. Or was I spinning? It was hard to tell.

"I need Nate." I said simply.

"Okay... Nate. I'll get you to Nate." The blonde girl was nice. She wanted to help me find Nate.

She held a phone to her ear, but I couldn't hear who she was talking to. I didn't care enough to pay attention. I just needed to throw up. So I did. I leaned down and threw up.

Hands rubbed my back, but they were strong. They weren't Serena's. They were lovely hands. I looked up, my face etched with confusion. "Are you Nate?" I asked.

"What has she taken?" The boy asked Serena, blanking me. Well that was rude. Especially when I knew the answer.

"Pills! Lots of pills! Floaty pills." I told him with a smile. "But now I need Nate. I need you to take me to him. Please! I need Nate!" I felt panicked, I was confused.

"I am Nate. Come with me, I'll look after you." He said and picked me up. Nate was very comfortable, so warm and cosy. So easy to just fall asleep on.

***

I woke up with a start. My head hurt and I wasn't in my bed. I looked next to me and saw a mess of sunkissed brown hair. "Nate?" I asked, my throat sounding worn out.

As soon as I spoke Nate was awake and suffocating me in a hug. "You're okay. I was so worried. You looked awful. I thought we were gonna have to take you to the hospital. I've never seen you that bad. What happened?"

A choked sob escaped my lips as soon as I had figured out what happened. Chuck had happened. Chuck slept with Blair. My sister. My evil, manipulative bitch of sister.

"Hey... What's wrong?" Nate asked and ran a soothing arm down my back.

"I need water, could you please get me some water?" I asked, avoiding his question.

"Of course." He nodded and got up.

I need to collect myself. How could I tell Nate? Would he care? He seemed to be over Serena. Does that mean he liked Blair again? Would it break his heart as much as it did mine?

It was too soon that Nate brought me back some water. I had no idea what to do. I smiled at him in thanks when he handed it to me and took a sip.

"You gonna tell me what happened last night?" He asked.

"I don't remember." I shrugged.

"Do you want me to call Blair to come and pick you up?" He asked.

"You can't!" I almost yelled.

"Why not?"

"Because-I. Because she done something bad and I don't want to speak to her." I nodded.

"So did I. You didn't want to speak to me yesterday. But at 4am I get a call from Serena saying that my name was all you could remember." I groaned at that and hid my face in my hands.

"I was so out of it."

"But does that mean I'm forgiven?" I just nodded my head and smiled at him.

"Are we skipping school?" I asked.

"You were rather against that yesterday."

"Well I've changed my mind. I just want to stay in and have a lazy day." I told him.

"I hope you don't mind if I join you?"

I shrugged my shoulders and laid against him. "Of course you can." I said. "But we have to go back to my house, all of my favourite films are there."

Nate smiled and picked me up. "Of course, m'lady."

"I can walk, you know?" I huffed.

"You don't have any shoes." He pointed out. I looked down at my bare feet and blushed, deciding not to say anymore about it.

I let myself be carried down the hall and into a car. Me and Nate didn't speak the whole car ride, but it was a comfortable silence. Everything with Nate was so easy, I could almost forget about Chuck and Blair.

"Nate, where's my phone?" I asked with furrowed eyebrows.

"In your bag." He said and passed my beloved Prada purse.

"I can't believe I didn't loose that." I grinned and took my phone out.

12 missed calls from Chuck.

15 missed calls from Blair.

23 unread messages from Chuck.

30 unread messages from Blair.

I sighed and opened the first one from Chuck.

'A, please answer your phone. Please? Where the hell are you?! We're worried.'

I rolled my eyes, so what if they were worried? They didn't seem to give a damn about me when they were fucking.

'Alexia, you have to let me explain. I'm so so sorry. Call me.'

No Blair, if you were sorry you would've told me as soon as it happened. I just deleted the rest without reading them.

"What are Blair and Chuck sorry about?" Nate asked, making me jump.

I knew I shouldn't keep it from him any longer. He had a right to know. "Blair and Chuck. When you broke up they." My voice cracked. "They slept together." I told him, tears filling my eyes already.

"What? But that's- your sister and my best friend." He frowned.

"Yep. Very recently turned ex. Same night." I said through gritted teeth. "The night I told him I love him." That one sentence was all it took for me to break down in tears.

Soon I was sobbing into Nate's embrace. "I'm sorry! I should've told you sooner but I didn't wanna hurt you."

"No, none of this is your fault. Don't blame yourself."

"What do we do now?" I asked.

"We need to talk it through with them."

"Talk it through? I was thinking more along the lines of telling Gossip Girl."

"No, I won't stoop that low. Though I can't promise I won't punch Chuck."

I laughed and shook my head. "Be my guest." I smiled.

The car soon arrived at my house and we raced each other up to my room. The day was spent laughing, crying, pigging out on food. It was fun. It was nice spending time with just Nate. That didn't happen very often. I looked up at the older boy and gave him a soft smile, which he returned to me and stroked my cheek.

"I don't care if you don't want to see me, you have to talk to me at some po-" Blair cut off as soon as she saw I wasn't alone in my room. Which she had just so happened to bardge into. "Nate." She gasped.

I rolled my eyes and popped another raspberry into my mouth. "Could you please leave my room." I hissed out.

"Why? So you two can go back to being cozy?" Blair snapped.

"No, Blair. Because I'm not you. I would never shag Nate unless I was 100% positive that you didn't love him! But no, you're happy to fuck my boyfriend. The same day that I told you how I felt about him. I'm not a skank like you. So get out!" I yelled at her.

"Alexia." Chuck crossed in front of Blair and I couldn't hold it in, sobs wracked through me again.

"GET OUT!" I screamed. "GET OUT OF MY HOUSE. I HATE YOU. I FUCKING HATE YOU! LEAVE ME ALONE!"

Nate appeared at my side and before I knew it, Chuck was on the floor supporting a bleeding nose. Nate had just punched him. "She said get out. So leave. Both of you." Nate snapped.

"I think this is bad timing." Dan said, appearing with Serena next to him.

"Great, perfect. Why don't we invite the whole school over?" I hissed out.

"A, you're my sister. We get through the worst together. This is my worst. I'm so sorry. It was foolish and the mere thought of it makes me want to puke. But we shouldn't loose each other over this."

"You're not my sister anymore, B. Any faith I had left in you was gone the moment you slept with him. As far as I'm concerned you're just that bitch in the room next door. I want nothing more to do with you. Leave." I spat out.

Blair gave me one last tear filled look before leaving, everyone else following in tow. Except Nate.