I heard my phone ring, telling me I had gotten a message. I quickly checked to see who it was, noticing that it was Jocelyn. I tried to put my phone away quickly, which didn't work because Katy grabbed it out of my hands seeing who it was. I usually didn't mind whenever she did that but this time was different, if she saw it was she would freak. Too late for that. Katy saw who it was and I could tell she was hurt.

"Why the fuck is Jocelyn texting you saying to pick her up at 7 for y'all's date" she said nearly screaming at me.

I was going to say something but she continued.

"You know she's my enemy and she's probably just using you to get to me, why would you do this to me, i thought we were friends"

That comment hurt...a lot. I wasn't doing this to hurt her, I was doing this to help her. I wish I could tell her that but I can't. I'm only 'dating' Jocelyn so she would leave Katy alone. All Jocelyn does is ruin her life, and I thought that if I do this, then her life would get better and she'd be happier. It's worked so far, up until now. And she should be thanking me, hasn't she noticed that Jocelyn has left her alone for the time being. I really wanted to tell her this, so she wouldn't be mad at me, but I knew what was right and I just left like she told me too. The things one does for the person they love.

I woke up the next morning alone. I for sure thought Chris would've stayed, but I guess not. I looked around for Crawford, that's when I realized everything that happened between me and him was real, which was the harsh reality I dreaded.

I walked downstairs and followed the smell of bacon. My favorite. I walked Into the kitchen and saw my mom dad and Chris in there. I'm pretty sure I had the most confused look on my face.

"Why are you here" I asked Chris yawning.

"Your parents asked me to stay"

I just let it go, not wanting to get into much detail. Chris walked over to me taking my hand and pulling me out of the kitchen.

"Hey, how are you holding up"

"Okay, I guess"

There wasn't much to say. What happens, happens. I just have to forget about it, let go of the past. I know it's only been a day but I don't want to spend the day moping around. Chris gave me that look like 'I know something's up, what's wrong, you can tell me'.

"Chris just let it go, alright?"

I appreciated that Chris cared, but I just don't want to talk about it. Everything is happening to fast. First with Crawford then with Chris, I don't know what to do. Maybe my parents are right and I just need to be alone for a while and not have them in my way.

"You can go Chris" I said walking him out the door.

I went back to the kitchen and saw my mom was just now laying out the plates, so I sat down and grabbed a piece of bacon off the plate.

"Where did Chris go" my mom asked

"Oh uh he left"

"Oh well alright then"

I was hoping that the conversation was going to end there but I was wrong.

"Katy, your father and I were thinking that maybe we were a little to hard on you, and you don't have to stay away from Crawford"

Ugh great just great. I wish parents could read their child's mind so they know what not to say.

"No mom it's okay, a punishment is a punishment. I'm okay, can't hang out with Crawford I got it, I know" I said getting up from the table and going back to my room. I laid on my bed, just thinking. Not really about one thing, but life in general and everything that is going on. I spent most of my day doing what I didn't want to do, sitting around doing nothing, moping around.

I was falling asleep when I heard a knock on my window. I looked out and say Crawford. I rolled my eyes and laid back down. He continued to knock. I swear why can't he just go home, can't he see I don't want to talk to him. I got up and opened my window.

"Crawf go home"

"But why"

"Because I sa-" he ignored my and came into my room

"Or you can come in, whatever"

"Craw-" I was going to ask him what he wanted and why was here, but he cut me off by kissing me.

I started to kiss back but I quickly pulled away realizing this was wrong.

I was speechless, I didn't know what say. I just kind of stood there in shock and confusion.

"Katy, i really like you and want you to know that. There is nothing going on between me and Jocelyn, I was just trying to help you out so she wouldn't bully you anymore"

"What"

"What I'm really trying to say is that I like you a lot and have for a long time, will you be my girlfriend"

I was beyond shocked at this point.

"I-I-I- I can't"

"Why not" he sound so disappointed, I felt worse by the second.

"I just can't okay, you understand right?"

"Yeah I guess, but can I have an explanation"

"Crawford, please"

I was nearly in tears, I didn't want to be in the situation, but somehow I managed it and I want out

"It's as simple as I don't like you like that Crawford, just say it"

"But that's not true, I do like you"

What am I saying? since when do admit my real feelings? why is this happening?

"Then why can't you say yes"

"Because"

"Because why"

I just snapped, why does he have to know everything.

"Because of Chris, okay, because of Chris, is that what you wanted to hear, I can't say yes, coz of Chris"

"What does Chris have to do with anything of this"

I just stood there and watched his expression change. He now had sad eyes.

"Because you like Chris"

"Crawford-"

"No Katy it's fine I get it"

"No. Crawford please don't"

He was ignoring me now. No matter how hard i tried and begged he would listen. He just left, leaving me there crying. I slid down the wall, and tucked my face into my knee. My life sucks. Everything I do, I screw it up. I just lost my best friend and most likely Chris too, if he finds out. They say everything happens for a reason, what was this reason, am I really that bad a person? I don't know why I couldn't stop crying, I usually don't cry for long periods of time, but this is different. It feels like I've lost everything that is important to me and I'll never get them back.