The days are dragging on, I have been barely hanging on. My mood getting darker and darker every day, like the light had been snuffed out of my world. McKenna still refused to help me and yet again any attempt I made to contact Ally has not worked. Tonight, I was trying to push all of it away to focus on the pups in the pack, tonight was for them.

Even though I was trying my hardest to present at the moment, I found I was struggling. I kept having to remind myself and refocus on the pups. I am not sure why it was so hard for me to focus today, something just felt different, exciting, like everything was about to change. It was something I could sense in the air and it was driving me crazy. There was something happening today that went far beyond the season, far beyond the celebrations of the day. I didn't know what it was, but the vibrations from the earth were different.

I was walking the pack grounds, making sure there were no tricksters out tonight. It was Halloween, and one with a full moon to boot. No doubt some of the teens would be more about mischief making then trick or treating. Carved pumpkins lit up the porches, many houses decorated with spider webs and goblins.

I heard a shriek from down the road and a couple of young pups running from someone wearing a gorilla costume. It was an amazing feeling to look around and see how happy everyone was in the pack. The changes we had all been working so hard to finally pay off. The atmosphere was now lighter, as the people were happier now.

The homes were now repaired, or in the process of being repaired. Trash was no longer lining the streets and the smell of urine was no longer lingering in the air. Our lands were revitalized, strumming with life, with happiness. I was proud to say that these were our pack lands.

"Hey Alpha." Someone called from their porch, waving me up. "Please, come join me." I looked over and saw the friendly grandmotherly face of a long-time pack member.

I walked up their walkway, "How are you Mrs. White? "

"Doing well, Alpha. Thank you for asking. Would you like a glass of iced tea?" She asked, although I don't think she would have given me any option as Mrs. White had already poured it and was thrusting the chilled glass into my hand.

I smiled back at her kindness, "Thank you, Mrs. White." I leaned on the railing of the porch taking a sip of my tea, continuing to watch the pups on the street.

"It is a great night isn't it?" She said, I nodded my head in agreement. "Oh look, trick or treaters." There were three pups now coming up her walkway. Pulling herself from her chair she walked over to the steps.

"Trick or treat!" They sang in unison.

"Now what do we have here? Look at how adorable you all are. A ninja, a doctor, and ..." she pretended to have a hard time guessing the last costume, putting a smile on the young pups face, he was probably no more than a few years old. "you must be a puppy?"

"I a wolf!" He said, earning a laugh from the girl dressed as a doctor, I am assuming she was his sister by the way she was holding his hand.

"Yes, you are Thomas. A big wolf, huh!" She cooed at him.

"I am sorry, Thomas, my eyesight just is not that good anymore. I can clearly see now you are a big, strong wolf." Mrs. White said playing into the young boy, while putting candy into their bags.

"Thank you!" They all chorused together again, turning off the steps, waving back to us as they went along to the next house.

Mrs. White sat back down again, "Pups, aren't they the sweetest things." A smile on her face, "I remember when my pups were young. Now those were the days." A smile graced her face as she thought back to her pups when they were young.

I silently sipped my tea, thankful for the silence, but with Mrs. White that never lasts long. "Now, tell me Alpha, when are you going to go find our Luna?" If anything, Mrs. White never had an issue asking anything, she was like a grandmother to the pack, so no one ever really minded that she was nothing more than a meddling old lady at this point in her life.

"Trust me, I have tried." I sighed out a breath of aggravation, "I keep hitting dead ends." I replayed the countless conversations with McKenna, me begging her to tell me where Allison was, her always refusing.

"Alpha, can I give you a bit of advice?" I looked over to her, knowing that she was not going to give me the option to say no. "In all my years, I have learned that everything works itself out in the end. We all have our own paths in life that we must take to learn the lessons that our souls need to learn." She looked in my eyes, like she was reading my souls. "There are many things that you have needed to learn and many more left still. I am sure that our Luna has had her own lessons to learn. You and your Luna will be brought back together someday, you just need to have faith."

"Do you really think that she will come back to me one day?" I asked, hopeful.

"Call it an old woman's intuition, but I know that one day you will be reunited."

"Thank you for the tea, Mrs. White. And the pep talk. You have given me much to think about." I smiled at her, "But I must be on my way with my rounds." She nodded her head and gave me a kiss on the cheek before I stepped off her porch.

Before I made it to the end of the walkway, she called out to me, "Even if you aren't there, they will feel you, Alpha. They will know you." Her words stopped me, what could she be talking about? I looked back to ask her a question, but she had already made her way inside and shut her light off. Shaking my head, thinking she must have been talking about the pack kids that were running around tonight.

Mrs. White's words hung with me the rest of the night. Something in them not sitting quite right with me, like she knew something that I did not. That she had some insider knowledge that I wasn't privy to. It was getting late and I could not ignore the gnawing in the pit of my stomach anymore.

Pulling out my cell phone, I decided to call again. Scrolling through my contacts, I pulled up her number and hit the green call button. It rang three times, before someone answered and I heard a whisper, "Give me a sec. I need to take this; I will be right back." Now, I couldn't be sure by I could have sworn that I heard her voice faintly in the background. So faint that I could not make out her words, but it was enough to give me hope.

"Why are you calling me again? Haven't we already been over this?" She hissed into the phone.

"She's with you. Please let me talk to her." I could no longer hold back the emotions, they were clawing to be let out, "McKenna, please I am begging you!" My voice shaking from the tears I was trying not to shed, "I need her."

"Listen, I am not going to let you talk to her. And I will not tell you where she lives. But I will tell you that she is happy, she is loved, and she is with someone now." McKenna was a broken record, saying the same thing over and over. It was like McKenna had reached into my chest and ripped my heart out with her bare hands, that she got some joy or thrill out of it.

"Why McKenna? Why won't you help me? I know I did her wrong, but I love her. I love her more than you will ever understand."

"I know you think you do. But she has someone that does and has shown her over and over what it is really like to be loved. Leave them alone, leave her alone. She is happy, they are happy together. If you ever loved her you will let it go and stop calling me."

"McKenna mark my words; secrets only stay buried for so long. She is going to know one day what you did, and it isn't going to end well. Please let her know I am trying to get ahold of her. Give her the option to tell me to leave her alone. If that is what she tells me I will honor her wishes, but I need her to tell me that not you." I was defeated, McKenna knew it, she held all the power right now and she was not letting me forget it.

The line was silent for a few minutes, so I looked to my screen thinking maybe she had hung up on me, but she hadn't, then she spoke, "Do not call me again, next time I will not answer. I will not tell her anything, I will not help you." And with her parting words she hung up the phone.

I knew that things had changed, I could feel it in the marrow of my bones. I wasn't sure what had changed, but I knew it had to do with Ally. Churning over the guidance from Mrs. White I knew that I had my own path to follow and I needed to trust that one day it would lead me back to Ally, but in the meantime, there were changes that I needed to make for me, changes that I needed for myself. I needed to learn to love myself, before I could ask anyone else to love me again.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

My phone was ringing in my ear, waking me from a sound sleep. Picking it up I glared at the screen looking to see who dared to wake me up at, eight thirty in the morning? Ok, maybe I had slept in a bit.

"Hi Kimber." I said gruffly, sleep still clinging to my voice.

"Oh, my Goddess, Tate! Are you still asleep?" She scolded me through the phone.

"If you must know, yes. I had a late-night last night and it is my day off."

"Late night, huh? What were you doing?" If I could see her face now, she would be winking at me.

"Nothing like that, get your mind out of the gutter. You know I still haven't found Ally." I said sucking in a deep lungful of air, trying to suppress the rage that it made me feel knowing she was out there, and I couldn't even speak to her.

"I know, I am sorry." She said.

I sat up on my bed, rubbing my free hand through my hair, "What is it that you called for?"

"Yeah, yeah, Mr. Straight-to-the-Point. I was calling to tell you that Jason and I are planning to get hitched." About a year ago Kimber had managed to find her true Mate as she was travelling across the country, one of her stops was to the Joshuen Heights Pack in Georgia, where she found her mate Jason, he is the Beta.

"Congratulations! I am happy for you, truly Kimber. I can hear how happy you are. But don't you think this is something you should be telling your brothers?" I appreciated that she thought of me and wanted to keep me updated on everything, but we weren't together anymore, she didn't owe me anything.

"Eh, they already know." She chuckled, "Jason actually asked for their blessing before popping the question. But I was calling to tell you to plan ahead, the wedding is going to be May twenty-first, you better be there."

I smiled, hoping that she could hear my happiness for her, "I wouldn't miss it!"

"Listen Tate, I have to go. I can't wait to see you and when you get here, I have something for you."

"Really? Do I get to know what it is?" My curiosity peaked.

"Not a chance buddy." She said chuckling at me, knowing that it would eat me up thinking about until then. "Hey, keep the faith Tate. She is out there; you will find her again." Kimber had been my cheerleader, really supporting me in everything. I was thankful to have her in my corner.

"Thanks Kimber, I appreciate your vote of confidence. Go be with your mate. I will be there for the wedding. Bye." I dropped my phone, hitting the red button to end the call. Grumbling I climbed out of bed, there was no use in trying to go back to sleep now, so I hauled myself out of bed.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

It was mid-afternoon when Markus came walking up to me, "Still working on this place?" He questioned.

"Yeah, it is rather cathartic." I answers, "Gives me a chance to think, put things into perspective."

I could tell that was a deeper answer than what he wanted, by the scrunching of his nose, "What do you want, Markus."

"Nothing just wanted to check on the progress of the house, really. I saw you working out here and since I hadn't stopped by in a while I figured, why not." He shrugged.

"It's going well. Slow going doing it by myself, but the flooring on the main floor is done, the kitchen cabinets are finished. Eh, mostly finishing touches, some paint, floors in the bedrooms, and then furniture and decorating. Almost there." I commented on the progress of the house that I had decided to build.

"How much longer?"

"A few months, probably be done before Kimber's wedding." I commented, trying to solicit his views on her getting married.

"So, she did call you. That's great. I didn't want to be the one to break it to you."

"You say that like it was going to break me? I am happy for her; she deserves to be happy. I am glad that she found her mate." I grabbed my water bottle opening it and taking a long guzzle.

"Now, only if you could find yours, right?"

"Yeah, if only." I said, "I will, I know I will. I can feel it." Markus nodded to me, "Speaking of mates, where is yours?"

"Pup is due any day now, so she is resting at home with her feet up." I nodded my head in understanding, his mate Lulu had the worst time the last couple of months, the pup was taking its toll on her. "I wanted to know if I could take the next few weeks off, stay home, be close to her. You know, just in case."

"Yeah, of course. Whatever you all need. Let me know if there is anything that I can do." I replied, happy for my best friend and his mate. They were going to be great parents.

"Now, show me this house that you built forAlly. I haven't seen it since you put up the framing." Markus clapped his handon my back and walked past me to the front wrap around porch that I hadrecently finished and walked into the house.