"Nikkah"

(wedding registry)

"han nikkah"

(yes nikkah)

"laiken aaj? Jab teh hai k barat k sath hoga to aaj kiyoun?"

(but today? It was planned to be done with wedding then why today)

"aisay he socha alag se karlun waisay bhi aj tumhain koi kaam nahi so don't worry"

(no reason I just thought to do it today and you don't have any works for today anyway so don't worry)

"par..."

(But...)

"par kia? Meri shadi hai meri marzi"

(But what? It's my wedding my wishes)

Here I am convincing Hussain not to do nikkah today as shehry will be late if all the damage happen now, but I can do nothing he is so curious for the nikkah that he isn't waiting for 3 days.

matlab jo hojaye shehry ka aa kar bhi koi faida nahi hoga

(means no matter what even if shehry come he can't stop the damage)

I was feeling deep pain inside me seeing him like this so calm and feeling nothing

abhi he mujhay talaq di hai aur aaj he nikah

(he just divorced me and now this nikkah)

"Hussain...."

I called him and he turned to listen.

"meri khushiyon ka dhaga toor kar us main apni khushi ki motiyan piroo rahy hain ap...itni jaldi hai apko zara dhaga jornay ki koshish to ki hoti".

(you broke my world tearing my thread using it to sew your pearls in it, you are so in hurry didn't even tried fixing my thread my shattered world)

I said what I was feeling right now

"tumhara dhaga kacha tha Amaya zara sa khenchnay par tooth gaya agar gath laga kar jorh bhi leta to tumhain pata hai mujhay ganth se kitni nafrat hai isi liye socha jitna dhaga seedha hai us mai moti he piro kar daikh loon"

(Your thread was weak amaya so as your world I stretched it a little and it broke so I tried fixing my pearls in the rest pieces of the thread, and if I tried fixing it by making a knot it would've made me uncomfortable you know, so I just mend what I could)

He said and left me out there speechless what should I say what he was talking about but one thing was sure that whatever ill do to stop this nikkah but this nikkah will be going to be happening.

our hall was all ready with a little decoration for the nikkah. there was no guest coz Hussain didn't invite any he wants this a simple nikkah with the relatives so my home was so silent after a time

Amyra was even ready in her white sari which she just buy it now and the beautician was making her up for the event

I called Sid to tell him about the whole situation and he was just say me to be brave and try for a chance but I was feeling hopeless as there is no hope left to make our family together

Getting myself too in a white frock I wear the earrings Hussain gifted me in our first meet covered my head with a golden embroidered dupatta leaving my hairs open inside

I made Anaya to wear her comfortable frock as she is too young to wear clothes embroidered

I saw my baby little sad as she is not the one now happy and chirping

holding he up to my level I asked her

"kia hua meray bachay ko tum bhi mumma se naraz ho kia?"

(what happened to my baby are you also upset with mama?)

and she shook her head in no making me to ask more

"to phir???"

(then what?)

"dayde..."

She replied in her little baby tone making me smile and a little sad as she also understand what's happening around

Taking her out with me I found aunty (amyra's mom) coming towards me and I smiled standing there

she came making me hold one folded paper and then moved faster to the other side seeing here and there as if she is afraid of anything

Going again in my room and making Anaya a bottle of milk as she will be busy then in drinking I hold the paper in my hand thinking

ye ho kia sakta hai?

(What could this be?)

And then in confusion I opened it to reveal a long letter by her. The letter reads...

Amaya beta, mai tujhsay baat nahi kar sakti kiyoun k meri beti mujhpar nazar rakhay huay hai. jo horaha hai ab ussay badal to nahi sakti mai bus itna kahoongi apni beti ko jald se jald yahan se lekar kaheen door bhag ja. samajh le ab teri akhiri khusi pe nazar hai meri beti ki...

apni beti ki har galti k liye mai mafi mangti hun tujhsay...kash mai tere liye kuch kar pati.

(Amaya Dear, I can't speak to you because my daughter *amyra* is having an eye up on me. The thing that's happening right now I can't help it but I can say this that run far away from here with your daughter. Let's say my daughter *amyra* have an eye on your only happiness now.

I apologize you for every mistake on behalf of my daughter... I wish I could help you.)

The letter made me confuse more about it i didn't understand why aunty said this. I mean Hussain allowed me to stay in this house as don't want Anaya to feel that he has no father or mother. Why I should be going and

Amrya Anaya ko kiyon kuch karegi wo to bachi hai

(why would Amyra do anything to Anaya she is a kid)

Thinking this I was all confuse but then I thought to concentrate less on the letter so folding it again I shoved it in my purse again moved out with Anaya in my hands when Hussain called me.

Sitting in front of a qazi who will be doing my nikkah I was a little tensed how to ask what I wanna ask him

"beta kuch puchna chahty ho"

(son wanna ask something)

Qazi asked me reading my expression and I nodded

"qazi sahab ye meri doosri shadi hai"

(Sir qazi this is my second marrige)

"astagfirullah...us ka socho jis par beet rahi hogi, najanay kia zaroorat pesh aan pari tumhe is shadi ki khair apni pehli biwi se ijazat li hai k nahi?"

(Astagfirullah *seeking forgiveness from Allah*... think about the one suffering, I don't understand what made it so urgent for you to do this wedding, anyways have your first wife permission you)

He asked and I nodded

"par qazi sahab kal he mainay ussay talaq de di hai"

(but sir qazi I just divorced her yesterday)

"lahol wala kuatah pata hai Allah ko talaq se kitni nafrat hai?"

(Lahol wala kuatah *ashamed expression* do you know how much Allah hate divorces?)

he asked and I nodded feeling a little embraced but I want to conform

"qazi sahab mujhay ye maloom karna hai k kal talaq hui hai k nahi"

(Sir qazi I want to confirm if divorce is valid or not)

"us k liye tumhe apni pehli biwi ko bulana parega"

(for that I have to ask your wife)

he replied and I called Amaya from there and she come holding Anaya, looking at the qazi she greeted him Salam and then sit in some distance

"beti jis waqt inhoon ne apko talaq di thye ap hosho hawas main thye?"

(Daughter when he divorced you were you conscious completely?)

"jee"

(yes)

Amaya replied and then the qazi gazed me

"aur ap,aap hosh mai thay koi jalali faisla to nahi tha?"

(And you, were you conscious are you sure it wasn't because of anger)

"je nahi mai hosh mai tha aur sukun mai tha"

(no I was totally conscious and in peace)

"to phir talaq hui hai"

(then divorce did happen)

the qazi informed

Listening to this Amaya got up from the place she was and moved to the other side of the lawn and I instruction qazi sahab about the nikah also got off my seat

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

Sitting next to the flower curtain my gaze was on my laps when qazi sahab started the nikkah starting it with some prayers and then the moment came

" Hussain wald asif kiya apko Amyra wald habib se nikah qabool hai?"

(Hussain son of asif do you accept Amyra daughter of habib as your bride?)

qazi sahab asked me and the moment he asked I suddenly was feeling anoxic and my breath became heavy, I got problems breathing and I couldn't speak up

" Hussain wald asif kiya apko Amyra wald habib se nikkah qabool hai?"

(Hussain son of asif do you accept Amyra daughter of habib as your bride?)

The qazi sahab asked me again and I was all the same, shifting my gaze to my left I fount Amrya standing holding Anaya in her hands, getting up I walked in her direction and take anaya from Amrya , sitting again to my place I took a deep breath and exhaling it I said

"qabool hai"

(yes I do)

" Hussain wald asif kiya apko Amyra wald habib se nikah qabool hai?"

(Hussain son of asif do you accept Amyra daughter of habib as your bride?)

"qabool hai"

(yes I do)

The moment I said qabool hai last time all the relatives happily stand and hugged each other and for a while I signed some papers

"Amaya wald haroon kia apko Hussain wald asif se nikkah qabool hai"

(Amaya D/o haroon do you accept Hussain s/o asif as your groom)

"qabool hai"

(yes I do)

"Amaya wald haroon kia apko Hussain wald asif se nikkah qabool hai"

(Amaya D/o haroon do you accept Hussain s/o asif as your groom)

"qabool hai"

(yes I do)

"Amaya wald haroon kia apko Hussain wald asif se nikkah qabool hai"

(Amaya D/o haroon do you accept Hussain s/o asif as your groom)

"qabool hai"

(yes I do)

The moment I said yes I heard all the ladies wishing each other on my acceptance when I feel two hands engulfing me in a warm hug happily and said

"Mubarak ho meri bachi ab tu biwi ban gai"

(congratulations my daughter you've became a wife now)

"Zubaida kaise batain kar rahi hain ap ye ek aur ghar ki beti buni hai duty mai izafa hua hai kami thori kiyoun Amaya beta"

(Zubaida what are you talking about she became a daughter of another home, her duty increased nothing decreased right amaya)

I heard my mother in law voice asking me and I replied with a

"Jee"

(yes)

Opening my eyes happily I found the same situation in front of me but it was for someone else Amyra now she is hussain's wife and now I'm nothing to him

I then found Hussain got there to Amyra and smiled widely to her holding Anaya in his hands, I saw a complete family there...Without...without me

I wasn't in a state to stay there more so getting the car keys I drove off to don't know where to, I just drove to the long road and then parked my car to the side of the sea going down to the water area.

"Aahhhhhhhh..."

"kiyoun Hussain kiyoun"

(Why hussain why)

"kiyoun kiya mere sath aisa tumnay"

(why did you do that to me)

"kiya begara the menay tumhara"

(what did I do to you)

"kia kami thye humary rishtay mai?"

(Where did my relation lacked)

"pyar ki"

(of Love)

I was talking to myself near the sae asking Hussain the questions in my mind I kept in me but he was nowhere. but still, I got a voice back at my last question shifting my gaze to the voice I found a familiar person to me

"Siddharth"

Seeing him there i got more week and all my emotions came out in a form of tears in front of him when he came closer hugging me and patting my back a little to ease me up.

Feeling week and numb I hold him back and cried hiding my face him. His chest until my eyes stopped shedding tears, after the crying session I feel a little awkward seeing me like this holding him

"sorry I got a little carried away"

I said pressing my lips a little and he replied with its okh with the smile

"amaya ek bat kahoon?"

(Amaya can I tell you something?)

He then asked and I nodded him to say

"Amaya I love you"

"What"

The moment he said I love you to me I was so confused and asked in disbelieve

"yes Amaya I really love you a lot please marry me"

"sid tum pagal hogaye ho"

(sid you've gone mad)

with that said I started moving but he hold my hand tight in his

"sid hanth choro mera"

(sid leave my hand)

"pagal nahi hua hoon Amaya ab to hosh aya hai, sach kehraha hoon bohot pyar karta hoon tumsay mai please mujhsay shadi karlo mai tumhain bohot khush rakhunga Anaya ko bhi apni beti ki tarah treat karunga"

(I haven't gone mad amaya I just became conscious now, I'm telling you the truth I really love you please marry me I'll keep you so happy I'll treat Anaya as my own daughter)

"Anaya k pas pehle se baap hai aur mujhay tumhari zaroorat nahi"

(Anaya already have a father and I don't need you)

"par mujhay hai Amaya please han keh do shadi krlo mjhse Amaya"

(but I need you amaya please say yes marry me amaya)

"sid stop it"

I shouted and he let go of my hand he was holding

"ek baat hamesha yaad rakhna mister Siddharth malhotra Amaya Hussain ki thye Hussain ki hai aur hamesha Hussain ki he rahy gi"

(just remember one thing always mister siddharth malhotra Amaya was for hussain is for hussain and always will be for hussain always)

I said and started moving to my car

"par Hussain Amaya ka nahi hai Amaya, Hussain Amyra ka hai"

(But hussain is not Amaya's hussain is for Amyra)

He said making my feet halted at the spot and then I moved back to him and then standing straight facing him I said

"Hussain Amaya ka ho ya na ho Amaya ka ishq hamesha Hussain k liye rahega aur Amaya bhi"

(no matter hussain is for amaya or not but amaya will always be for him so as her love)

With that said I moved to the car and drove of back home

Hitting the break my audio system automatically started playing and being too lazy I didn't shut it off as it was the only thing now killing the silence right now

A voice came from the speakers saying something which I didn't get and soon the song started with a soft little music

Ishq bin jiya na jaaye, Ishq bin mara na jaaye

Ishq sang nahi guzara, Ishq haaye khoon rulaye

Chaly teri raahon par chaly,Hamein par gham hi gham mily

Kabhi par shikwa na kiya, Ishq ko bhaaye na gily

Ishq bin jiya na jaaye, Ishq aansoo rulaye

Ishq mai nazar na aye,Ishq koi samajh na paye

Ishq bin jiya na jaaye, Ishq bin mara na jaaye

Ishq sang nahi guzara, Ishq haaye khoon rulaye

(can't live without love, cant die without love

can't live with love, loved once makes us cry

walked along on your path, I got sorrows nothing else

I never argued, love doesn't like arguments

cant live without love, loved once makes us cry

love makes us blind, love cant be understand

can't live without love, cant die without love

can't live with love, loved once makes us cry)

The song started describing my heart's situation very perfectly and with the truths of life the song made me realize that I actually got every pain in my life

"Har gham ko chup chap sehti rahi phr bhi gham mila. pyar karti hoon ussay par who nahi karta..woh Amyra se karta hai pyar"

(I endured every pain being silent yet I just increased. I love him but he don't... he love Amyra)

So rang chahat ky, So rang ishqy ky,

Jindri guzari hamne sang ishqy ky

Sukh mein rula ky hamko dukh mein hansaye ry,

Jaan na paaya koi dhang ishqy ky

Tery bin koi bhi nahi sunaye jis ko haal-e-dil,

Bhalay phir dunya chinn jaye

Magar tu aik baar aa ky mil

Ishq bin jiya na jaaye, Ishq aansoo rulaye

Ishq mai nazar na aye,Ishq koi samajh na paye

Ishq bin jiya na jaaye, Ishq bin mara na jaaye

Ishq sang nahi guzara, Ishq haaye khoon rulaye

(hundred colors of liking someone, hundreds for love

we spended a lot time together with love

it makes us cry when happy, but glass when we are sad

nobody can understand the ways of love

I have no one beside you who will listen to my heart

even if the world does deny,

I just want to meet you once

can't live without love, loved once makes us cry

love makes us blind, love can't be discern

can't live without love, cant die without love

can't live with love, loved once makes us cry)

Old memories started crawling over my brain, in the time we were happy, in the time we were together, in the time we were, a FAMILY

"thori dair k liye bhi nahi aa sakty?"

(Can you come here even for few minutes?)

"okh jaan I love you"

(Okh honey I love you)

"mera profession he aisa hai har baat explain karnay wala"

(My profession is like this that I have to explain everything)

"It's my favorite song let's dance"

"kiyoun karti ho mujhsay pyar han pecha kiyoun nahi choor deti mera?"

(Why do you love me. Why don't you leave me alone?)

"mai dar gaya tha Amaya mai bohot daar gaya tha"

(I was scared amaya I was so scared)

"ab toh rishtay say laounga"

(now with a relation)

I remembered our journey from happy to sad from good to bad but this was nothing as he was fooling me before even I knew. it was all his act which is now no more the person is in front of me is real Hussain.

Kesy gham diye hain tuny kiya kahein tujh sy

Dard hai akela pan hai dukh kahein mujh sy

Koi nahi hai tera saary jahan mein

Kuch bhi na paaya tuny khud ko mitta ky

Chaly teri raahon par chaly

Hamein par gham hi gham mily

Kabhi par shikwa na kiya

Ishq ko bhaaye na gily

(what kind of sadness is this what should I say

pain and loneliness keeps reminding me my fate

there's nobody like you in this world

you got nothing erasing yourself

walked along on your path,

I got sorrows nothing else

I never argued,

love doesn't like arguments)

Whenever I am sad why everything in this world wants to make me cry even more I thought speaking to myself.

Sahi to hai is song mai kia milla mujhay apna wajood mitta kar? Kia mila akhir itna sab kar k? bus dukh, takleef, reh to mai akhir akeli he gayi

kabhi Hussain ko kuch na kaha doosron ki tarah shikwa kiya kabhi unsay time nahi manga unhe unki zindagi jeenay ka moqa diya unko life mai space diya and unhon nay kia kea talaq dia mujhay aur akela chor kar mujhay Amyra k sath hain ab wo

(This song is right what did I got after erasing myself? What did I got doing so much? Just sorrow, pain, at the end I am alone anyway. I never said anything to hussain, nor did I argued like others I never asked him to give me time I always gave him space to live his life. I always gave him space in his life and what he did to me he divorced me and let me be alone and he is with amyra now)