After explaining everything to my dad and hearing his side, I leave the room as quickly as possible. Speed walking to my room, I try not to let my emotions engulf me. I feel the tears stinging my eyes as I take in a few shaky breaths to try and keep them from falling. I keep my head down and avoid eye contact with everyone I pass as I get closer to my room. As soon as I'm in my room, I lean against the door and I'm unable to hold it in anymore. The tears that threatened are now pouring uncontrollably down my cheeks and I slide down the door, letting the emotions take over me. I can't stop my shoulders from shaking as a quiet sob escapes my lips. Everything that's happened these past few days have put a toll on me mentally and now it's finally coming out. I can't help but think about my uncle and everything I found out, Mason and my family.

My fathers reaction was exactly what I expected. His usually stern but gentle features were filled with anger as he processed the situation. Talking to him got increasingly hard as I explained more and his anger grew on his face. As I talked to my dad, my mothers crying calmed down a tiny bit and my emotions and anxiety went into overdrive. There was so much tension and emotion thickening the air it felt as if it was hard to breathe. I hate confrontation, mainly because I hate to disappoint. Seeing them both this way hurts my heart, especially seeing my mother cry and knowing that I'm the cause of it. As I playback the conversation, I start thinking about Justin. My stomach reels at the thought of telling him.

We were a lot closer years ago; when we were kids. As we got older and further into our teenage years, we started to drift apart. As siblings do, we grew up and developed separate lives, different passions and priorities, different friend groups and relationships. All of that made us grow apart because we were both focused on different things, but we're still family and we talk to each other every day. I know telling him everything is going to make him upset.

When I was twelve I was deathly afraid of clowns, and Justin tried showing me that they're not that scary, most of them are normal. On the other hand, he tried taking advantage of my fear and would scare me with it. So he kind of helped me get over that fear, but then again did not.

At age fifteen, when Joey Golfens cheated on me with some girl named Janice Willers, after I found out I came home crying. I should've known dating some older wouldn't be a good idea, I found that out the hard way. Justin was the first person to see me when I got home and he could tell by my face something was wrong. He forced me to tell him why I was upset, and the next day Justin got in a fight with Joey. Justin started the fight and confronted him, but Joe was the instigator when he went in for the first swing. The aftermath wasn't pretty, Joe ended up getting a black eye and busted lip while Justin left unscathed. After that happened, Joseph tried saying that "the other guy" looked worse, but everyone who was their knew what actually happened. I heard that him and Janice were inseparable until their relationship fell apart.

Getting off the floor, I rub my eyes as I lean against the door. My heart hurts and I feel like I'm going to vomit. Why is this so fucking hard? I'm telling my lifelong best friend that I'm leaving our pack.

Knowing him, he's going to be mad. After all, Mason has fucked Justin over more times than I can count on one hand. I don't think he's going to take it harder than mom and dad but maybe a little more than Madison. I've given this speech three times already and I feel like I need to rehearse it again before I tell Justin. Maybe I can just take a break and tell him tomorrow, I do have a few days before I have to move in.

In order to avoid my mother, father, Justin and Madison, I seclude myself in my room and skip dinner. Collecting my thoughts, I grab a notebook and start sketching random things. This is something I do occasionally when I have a lot on my mind and I feel like I need to do something rather than just sitting around. Another reason I didn't join them for dinner is because I didn't want to see Justin goofing off with any of his friends knowing that I am going to ruin his mood later. If he saw me, he would know something is wrong. Hell, maybe it would be easier if my parents told him and then I would just deal with the aftermath. At least I wouldn't have to be the one to repeat the words.

Shit, this is so hard.

~

I hear the clutter of a few people walking to their rooms, chatting amongst each other. The voices pass and after a few doors shut, silence fills the hallway. Feeling mentally and physically drained, I shut my eyes and enjoy the peace. I've cried so much today that I feel I can't cry anymore. My eyes feel puffy and hot, and my brain feels numb. I slowly open my eyes and become fixated on my lamp, letting my mind wander. As I zone out, a knock on my door snaps me out of it.

"Allie, I brought you dinner." My brothers low voice announces on the other side of the door.

"I'm not hungry." I lie, hoping he'll go away. I don't think I can handle talking to him right now. Shutting my eyes tight, I pray that he actually goes away.

"Okay. But we should talk." He answers, hesitating a little. Sighing, I place my hands on my head and sit up. I know we need to talk, and knowing him, he won't leave without talking to me. I take in a deep breath, walking to the door. I open the door, not making eye contact with him. My heart is aching and I feel as if I'm about to hurl.

"Thanks for bringing me food." I mutter, not knowing what else to say. I turn around without looking at him, and leave the door open, gesturing for him to follow.

Out of the corner of my eye, I watch him set the plate down on the dresser close to my bed. I sit on the bed, with him sitting on the other end. I stare dully at my covers, not knowing what to do. I don't know how to start this conversation. A tear escapes my eye and I quickly wipe it before he sees. I turn to face him, digging my nails into the palm of my hand.

"Al, are you okay? I know a lots been going on, but I've barely seen you today." He mumbles, concern written all over his face. I nod, doing my best not to let a tear slip. I move my legs so they're under me. I'm afraid if I talk, I'll start crying. "Look Ally, are you sure you're okay. You just seem sad and I want to make sure you're okay." Sighing, I realize that he doesn't know.

"Justin," I say struggling to find words. My minds a mess and my stomach is twisting. A tear falls down my face as I whisper, "I love you so much, J."

"I love you too." He says, concerned after seeing my tear.

I wrap my arms around him in a hug and the tears start falling faster. H hugs me back as I start sobbing into his shirt. "I'm so sorry." I sob, unable to control it. "For-" I pause, letting the tears slide down my cheeks and choking on my words."For everything."

"You don't have to be sorry for anything, Al." He mumbles, wiping my wet hair from my tear-stricken cheeks.

I pull away from him and stare blankly at a wall. The tears continue to fall, pouring down my cheeks and onto my shirt.

"You don't have to be sorry for anything, Al. " I whisper, moving her hair away from her face. I don't know why she is so upset, I wonder if it's because something happened or maybe she just bottled up her emotions again. I watch as she stares at the plain whit wall, concerned. I never know what to do when someone is upset because I just sit their awkwardly. I'm not good with emotions. I continue to stare at her and notice her bloodshot eyes as if shes been crying all day. Tears are dripping off of her chin as she just stares dully into space. "Whats wrong Allison?" I ask, inanely concerned now.

"I am so sorry." She says, pulling her hands to her face to cry into them.

"Why are you sorry?" I start getting nervous and watch as she pulls her hands away from her face and stares at them, sniffling.

"I-I'm leaving the p-pack." She stutters, still looking at her hands.

"What?" I question, shocked. I'm unsure if I heard her wrong.

"I-I'm l-leaving the p-pack." She repeats. I stare at her dumbfounded, unable to process what she said.

"Why? Where are you going?" I question, confused. I stare at her and her breathing is unsteady as she tries to stop herself from crying. I can't wrap my head around the idea. She's leaving? She's only 18. If she leaves I cant protect her anymore.

She moves her eyes to meet my gaze before whispering, "I'm moving in with Mason. I didn't know how to tell you earlier." I stand up with a million things going through my head.

I place my hand on her computer chair and move so quick that it falls down. "I need to get out of here." I feel my blood getting warm as I walk out of her room. I hear commotion in her room, knowing she is going to chase after me. I take a sharp turn, and clench my fists as I rush don the stairs, passing everyone without looking at them.

"Yo dude, you okay?" Cameron asks and I move past him in the direction of the back door.

"Justin!" I hear Allison yell, trying to catch up with me. Ignoring her and staring straight ahead, I open the door and slam it shut behind me without looking back. As soon as I'm outside, I start running deeper into the woods. Anger is filling my blood and once I'm submerged into the trees, I let my rage take over and shift.

Anxiety is flooding through my body as I pace my floor, back and forth between my bed and window. My window faces the woods, so if Justin was anywhere close I would see him. It's been over an hour since Justin went into the woods and. None of us know where he's at, and about 10 minutes ago Ally's mom sent Cameron and Tyler out to find him. It's not unusual for him to take this long but with how upset he was, its making us all worried. Justin is insanely hotheaded and can be kind of dramatic with how angry he gets, but I'm worried he did something stupid or he's hurt out there. I shuffle over to the window, scanning the woods but I can't see any of them.