Ghosts haunted his eyes, his heart felt heavy. The weight in his chest tugged at him, and Taka fell to his knees. Just now, he saw Toru, unconscious, his chest heaving, limp on a stretcher carried my emergency doctors, all wearing protective attires. The truth refused to drill into his mind, he refused it.

He ran after Toru, but two strong arms held him back, "you'll be infected" the doctor had said, before he forced Taka into his own apartment. "Toru" he whispered to the silence of his surroundings. His heart beat too loud in his ears, even the ringtone of his beloved one seemed too faint. Taka's numb hands reached for the phone, see? He's fine. He panted. But when he answered, the mobile dropped, along with his soul. "Taka" Toru pronounced meekly. He sounds tired, Taka's inner self screamed. "I need you to go to a hospital, and do the test yourself. Please"

"n-no" Taka breathed, he didn't want to believe it. "Please, Taka" Yet, the vocalist didn't answer, he hung up and dropped on the couch. Tomoya and Ryota called next, and Taka still didn't answer. He remained huddled in his place, he bit his lips and hugged his knees tighter. The first whimper escaped, then the first tear, followed by the first sob. Then, Taka broke down in tears. Water cascaded down his cheeks, staining his clothes.

"Toru....Toru...please answer me" he cried between his sobs, knowing perfectly well that Toru wasn't there. Sorrow tugged on his organs, he felt his heart screaming to be freed from its pain. "How can I live without you?" He questioned the photo of Toru he plastered on his wall, healthy and smiling. "Don't leave me Toru" Taka spoke again, salty water still streaming.

Two days passed, and Taka still ignored his smartphone. He didn't eat, nor sleep, all he did was think of Toru. Toru and Toru only. He thought about how his blonde lover lay in the hospital alone, in pain and isolation. He figured a shower would calm him down, however, little did the frontman know. Taka turned on the warm water, and as usual, tilted his head up, enjoying the sensation of water trailing down his body. Soon after, water started falling from his eyes as well; the heat of the water reminded him of Toru's touch, of Toru's warmth, that he'll probably lose forever.

That night was another listless one for the vocalist. He thrashed in his sleep, had nightmares and woke up in cold sweat. Eventually he gave up on falling into the abyss of dreams. Taka remained in bed, hugging the pillow Toru left over at his place. By dawn, his lids couldn't hold open any longer, they closed shut, providing Taka with dreamless slumber. Nevertheless, his nap wasn't long for he woke up to someone pounding on his door.

He didn't have the energy nor the will to get up. Takahiro slipped under the covers, hiding his ears to block the noise. "Mori-chan please open the door!" The stranger called from the other side, making Taka squirm further into the sheets. "MORI-CHAN" Ryota called louder. Still no answer. Ryota tried using his trump card. "You don't want to know the news about Toru?" Within seconds, Taka was at the door, messy and frowning. The bassist chuckled at his frontman and forced his way inside.

"Before I tell you, I need you to promise me something" Ryota started, staring Taka dead in the eye. "What is it?" The latter asked "I know you never break a promise" "what is it?" He repeated.

"Tomo-kun and I did the tests, and we're waiting for the results. We want you to do yours too"

"I won't"

"then no news about Toru" Ryota stood up and headed to the door

"wait!"

The youngest smirked and walked back to his bandmate. He took Taka in his arms.

Ryota tried reasoning with his instincts while he tightened his grip around the petite singer. "Toru will be alright. A maximum of two weeks"

At the sound of the words, teardrops formed in Taka's eyes once again "r-really?" He muttered, looking at Ryota with hopeful eyes, too innocent for his age. "Yes! Toru is strong, that's what the doctor said" Ryota grinned, patting Taka's head, who dropped into the embrace again when his limbs went weak. "Thank you, thank you" the shorter whispered. "Now then, dress up with something proper you need to do the test"

"I'll go myself"

"You can't drive" Ryota fought back, his brows raised. He noticed the shift in Taka's expression and almost swore that he remembered Toru again.

"Hey" Toru's voice sounded from Taka's phone that night. Taka sat snuggled up with the teddy bear Toru bought him on valentine's. He yelped in surprise when the all too familiar ringtone echoed through the empty rooms. But there he sat, holding his phone so tight his knuckles turning white. He held his tears back, utterly joyous to hear Toru's voice. "I missed you" was the first thing Taka whispered, hugging the plushei tighter.

He heard Toru chuckle at the end of the line, a strained laugh, but even that brought a smile to Taka's lips "it's only been 4 days" Toru responded, sounding amused. "Toru I missed you when you lived right in front of my door" Taka huffed in retort, causing Toru to laugh once more. "I promise I'll come back, wait for me" Toru muttered, trying his best to cast the loneliness from his tone. "I want you to live your life as best as you can until I come back" he paused, reminiscing an angry Ryota huffing over the phone about how Taka abandoned his health.

_I'll try

_baby, I want a definite answer

_fine, I will!

_Much better

There was a pause where neither of the two spoke, they just remained still, enjoying the peaceful silence lying between them. Their hearts beat faster, both thinking of the moment of their reunion

"I love you Toru"

"I love you too" Toru chanted in response, going back to his loneliness when Taka hang up. He wouldn't let the feeling he detested get to him, not when he's writing songs to surprise his boyfriend when they meet again. Toru was doing his best, putting every thought he had, just to make Taka happy. "I hope he likes them" he smiled fondly at his papers, imagining how Taka would smile proudly at him when he reads them.

When Taka's test results were proven negative, he got a call from Rock Sound, the magazine he worked with before. They said that he was meant to participate in their online festival. The blonde vocalist considered refusing, but then again, he promised Toru to live his life normally. Taka accepted, even though he didn't feel like it, for maybe singing, his passion, will get his mind off his sorrow for a while. Even so, his heart disobeyed his orders.

Taka set up the camera, prepared his headphones and lyrics in hand. The track started, and the singer tried to chant to the beat, except that his voice came out broken. Every time he tried to sing, his throat stopped moving, stuck by a lump he tried so hard to overcome. Taka was too emotional at the time, too occupied with Toru to think of anything else. His first try was in vain. One by one, his attempts came out better and better, until he found one that suits his standards. Despite the perfection of his voice, he failed in depriving it from sadness, he sounded emotional, but he knew he couldn't sing as usual with Toru's situation, and recent death of his dearest friend.

Takahiro submitted the video and retreated to the kitchen, spread out the ingredients and waited for Toru's promised call. He remembered how his lover confessed that he missed watching Taka cook. He asked for a video call, which Taka certainly couldn't refuse.

The span of two weeks ended, and Taka waited and waited. Any sign of Toru, any sign that his lover will be discharged. Anything. But nothing satisfied his desperate implore. Neither of Tomoya and Ryota answered his calls either.

The door bell rang, and Taka walked towards it, unenthusiastically. Yet, the moment the door slid open, it was as if his world spun around. For the second time, he could not believe his eyes. Not even when he extended his hand and touched the person in front of him. "T-toru?" He muttered, his voice barely over a whisper. There he stood in front of him, real and smiling. He looked tired, and lost weight, but he was still there. Taka couldn't contain his tears, they fell heavy down his face. His body moved without his command, and he threw himself in Toru's arms, giving him the tightest embrace he could muster with his trembling hands. Toru stood still and silent. He lowered his nose to Taka's head, and patted his shoulders. He smelt like home. "I'm back,Taka"