Alex's POV

I handed Wanda the extra helmet I always carried with me. It's the old one she use to wear all of the time, but we aren't getting into that. What? It's always good to have an extra helmet.

She takes it with a smile, fumbling with the strap. I can't help but chuckle, remembering the first time she went for a ride on my bike. I don't hesitate to reach over and help her, my skin practically buzzing where we make contact.

I need to get that shit under control if she's going to ride on the back of my bike.

"Thanks."

"Welcome." Again I can't really explain it, but I found myself asking, "so, I know I said I'd take you home, but maybe you're up for some food?"

"Well, I did just eat.."

"Shit. Of course, sorry. I'll just take you home," I rush out. Damn, I'm just making a fool of myself, aren't I? I really do need to just take her home and stay away like I have been. It's what has worked out best for me.

"Oh. Okay." Does she sound disappointed? Nah. That's just in my head.

I swing my leg over the bike and then hold out my hand to help her. She hesitates.

"Are you okay? Do you still want a ride? Because I understand if you don't." She has moved on, it's clear. And I thought I had, too. I guess avoidance isn't the same thing as no feelings.

"No, I do. But.." I can tell she takes a deep breath. "But, maybe we could do something else? Besides get dinner?"

I know she can't see it, but my smile is squishing my face right now.

"Yeah, sure. Um, Ice cream? Or cake? Or any kind of dessert?" I'm probably too enthusiastic. Whatever.

She nods her head once, "ice cream sounds great."

"Perfect." I offer her my hand once again, waiting for her to hold onto me tight, ignoring the rumble of butterflies in my stomach, then take off. Her little squeal as I pull away releases the butterflies, sending them in every direction. Now my whole body is buzzing, floating, light as air.

It wasn't a long trip to our favorite ice cream shop, but I enjoyed every minute. Yeah, yeah. I'm trying not to let this all go to my head. And I'm not. It was just a nice ride. The weather is great.

Once I slow down to a stop, I turn off the bike and help her off before doing the same myself. Whether she needed it or not this time, I assisted in taking off her helmet.

"I forgot how much fun that is," she tells me with a wide smile.

"What, no one has been cool enough to take you out for a ride?" I'm kind of asking to see if she's been with anybody.

She shakes her head, "I went once or twice with Nat, Spencer and Yelena, but that was awhile ago. And uh.." then she just stops.

"And what?" I push. I'm curious.

"Nothing."

"Come on, tell me." I wiggle my eyebrows.

She half smiles, "it's not the same."

Well, though surprised, I am very glad to hear that, my heart going to an offbeat rhythm.

"Oh, really?" I can't help but tease her a bit.

She rolls her eyes, giving me a light nudge as she walks by me. "Come on, let's get some ice cream."

We walk over to the window, checking out what they had to offer.

We decided to split a few flavors we both wanted to try along with a milkshake each.

What? I love ice cream. We love ice cream. There's nothing wrong with it.

I handed them the money once we had a total.

"You didn't have to do that."

"Well, I wanted to. Besides, I was the one that asked you out."

"Oh? This was you asking me out?"

Fuck. I think I'm red as a tomato. Maybe even more so. Is it warm? I feel like I'm melting. "Uh- I - um.. n-no, I didn't.."

"It's okay, Alex. I said yes, didn't I?"

I'm too stunned to reply. So instead, the lady hands us the ice cream and Wanda walks off to a table. I'm still in shock. Does that mean this is a date? Do I want it to be?

I decide not to focus on that right now and instead go eat ice cream with .. Wanda. My ex. Right.

I sit down across from her and focus on the ice cream, diving in and trying the blackberry cheesecake. "Fuck, that's good." I had to take another bite immediately.

Her damn angelic laugh. "Is it that good, Alex?"

"Oh, yeah. It is. Try it," I don't even realize that I lift my own spoon for her to take the bite off of. My eyes widen as I notice, but before I can panic, she leans forward and takes the ice cream off the spoon as slow as possible.

Fuck. That wasn't hot. Not at all.

I clear my throat, "so?"

"Very good. Though it's not my favorite taste," she looks down before trailing her eyes up to meet mine again.

Holy shit. She's flirting with me. Hard. Right?

"Well, you should always eat what you love," alright. I said that.

"Couldn't agree more," she keeps eye contact as she goes for another bite of ice cream.

Fuck, how am I suppose to make it through this? I grab my shake and take a long sip from it, trying not to pay attention to what she is doing. Crossing my legs like I naturally wanted to, not because I have a new found wet patch on my underwear.

"So, how have you been? You look incredible."

I whip my head around to catch her checking me out. Again. I can't blame her, but still..

"Well.. that's a loaded question," I let out a breathy laugh. "But over all, pretty good. The gym is practically my best friend, although I wouldn't tell Max that. I've got my collection of tattoos. I've been working on the house a little bit. Especially lately. Work is going really well. And, yeah."

She smirks, "I didn't get to see the rest of your tattoos. Maybe I'll get to someday. The gym is my best friend too, I think."

I give her a quizzical look.

"The gym has been very nice to you. It's paid off, trust me."

I nod my head, at a loss for words. She hasn't stopped the flirting.

"How is everyone at the station?"

"They're great! Everyone is their same old selves. Liz and Max are actually together, now. It's super cute, but also a lot." I laugh at the thought.

"That's awesome! They must make a really good couple."

"They are! They actually just moved in together recently," I add.

"Wow. Good for them. They must have been moving faster than we did."

And that pauses the conversation.

"Uh.. What about you? How have you been, Wanda?"

She cringed a little for some reason. It's concerning, but none of my business?

"I've been.. okay. I guess." She looks down at the ice cream, but I catch how her eyes seem to glaze over. I know that trick.

"Hey, are you okay?"

"Oh, yeah. I'm fine."

"You aren't convincing me, Wanda. You don't have to talk to me, but you can."

"I highly doubt you want to hear it," she looks back up, tongue in cheek.

I can see the heart break in her eyes. How she's seconds away from letting it all go. I know the look because I carried it for so long.

"Hey, what is it? Or who is it? Did someone hurt you? What'd they do?" My concern levels just keep rising, the grip on my spoon about to break it, I'm ready to show someone what hell feels like.

"It doesn't matter, Alex!"

Woah. Okay, wasn't expecting that.

"Sorry, it's none of my business," I mumble before digging back into the ice cream needing something to put my attention on.

It's a few minutes before she speaks back up, "no, I'm sorry, Alex. You're just.. asking all these questions that I don't think I can talk to you about. And it's you, so it's even harder because I want to talk to you. And you offered me a ride and to get ice cream with you.. then you're here acting like you actually care about what happens to me and it's making it nearly impossible.."

That really gets my attention, "I'm not acting. I do care about you, Wanda. That doesn't just go away, and it never will. And if there's some son of an asshole out there hurting you, then yeah, I want to know about it. Well, I do and I don't." I scrunch my eyebrows together. I don't want someone to be hurting her, but I need to know so I can do something about it.

"You-" I see her fight back the tears, "you can't." Her voice breaks. I break along with it.

"What do you mean?" I ask at a whisper.

"You can't come swooping in to save me, Alex. Especially not when- you just can't."

"Why not?" I ask gently. Because she isn't actually giving me a reason. I'm scared to know, but terrified to not know.

"Because you left! You left and I know it was my fault that I broke us, then I shoved the knife in your back, but you left. Because you are the love of my life and I can't have you. You are right here, but you are out of my reach. Because of what I did; I did this, I caused this, this huge riff between us. Because I don't deserve it. You were gone and you took my heart with you. And I haven't recovered."

"Wanda-"

She holds up her hand, "so if you try to save me.. try to make this all better and be my hero.. again.. it's just going to make it all worse. Make it all more unbearable. I can't do it. And you can't. You can't actually save me. Not when I need saving because of you."

And then she breaks, fully. The tears, the sobs, I can't just sit here and do nothing. I quickly shift over to her side of the table and wrap my arms around her.

She fights it at first, barely pushing me away. I hold strong. Then, the tears come harder, they fall faster. Her head falls onto my chest. I keep one arm wrapped around her as the other runs through her hair.

She's right. I shouldn't be doing this. I shouldn't be here, I shouldn't have given her a ride, I shouldn't be comforting her.

She ruined me. Brought me to the edge of the cliff, and just when I thought she was bringing me back, she pushed me over.

But, after everything, I can't deny that I thought she was telling the truth; that she wanted to tell me, never meant for it to go how it did. That everything was real, that she loved me.

If I didn't already believe it, I certainly would now.

I know I needed the space and time away, that I had to grow as myself before anything else could happen, but I hate that she feels this way; that she doesn't even think she should be saved.

Because she does deserve it.

I don't hold back, I kiss her forehead. And I probably shouldn't have, but really, what are we even doing?

"It's okay, Wanda. It's okay. I've got you," I try my best to reassure her. Not that I even know if it will be okay. But I want it to be. I want her to be.

I feel her shake her head against my chest, "you don't know that. You- you can't say everything is going to be okay. Nothing is. It hasn't been since you left."