Wandas POV

I had no words once she left me standing there, I'm not even sure how long I was there for.

Once I was actually able to convince my limbs to move, I found my way over to our table feeling more like a robot than a person.

Luckily everyone was pretty drunk so they didn't really pay attention and I became the mom that had to get everyone else back home safely.

The part worked for how I was feeling.

It let me zone out, rehashing every word she said to me, every movement she made. When she smirked, and her eyes lit up. When she was so close that her breath mixed with mine.

What I could have done wrong.

And they're all laughing and fumbling over themselves as I half heartedly corral them into the limo Happy is driving for us.

I sit in the back and drown myself with some more of the wine we had stashed in the back. I know I will regret it later but.. I'm already miserable.

I make sure everyone gets to their rooms or.. a room at least. Letting them go off in pairs if they're so inclined.

I don't really care. I just hate that, an hour or so ago, I thought I'd be doing the same thing.

And not even with the person I've been dating.

And I feel like a horrible person, but.. for some reason she has this affect on me. It's like something else takes over. She just has to look at me or smile or..

She's making me question everything.

And she doesn't even care.

And it boils me inside.

But instead of going and destroying the training room like I would so enjoy doing, I lay in bed, the thoughts of her pushing me against the wall on replay in my head.

——————

I remember why I don't drink this much.

Even though I'm not even sure how I am able to think, I am pretty sure my head is pounding so loud that I question if that's all I will ever hear.

I don't want to move, but I have to.

As bad as I'm feeling, I know everyone else is probably feeling even shittier.

Well, maybe not.

But for different reasons.

Ugh. I rollover to my night stand where I'm pretty sure I had left some more water and a few pills for myself last night.

I take them quickly, willing them to work instantly, disappointed but not surprised when they don't.

Once I do feel it start to numb the throbbing that seemed to take over my whole head, I force myself to stand up and throw on some sweatpants and a T-shirt. I don't really care what I look like as long as I have something on. My eyes still mostly closed as I make my way to the kitchen.

The plan is to start some coffee, and if I haven't lost my head, attempt to make some pancakes for everyone.

But I'm smacked in the head with the bitter smell of coffee as I walk into the kitchen. The smell alone waking me up some.

At least enough to have the sense to wonder who is up before me and to look for the culprit.

It's Nat.

"Good morning, Wanda!"

Ew. Why is she so happy right now?

I only grunt in response.

She freezes her actions.

"Okay, not a good morning?" She says less sure.

I look over at her as I grab a mug and go to pour some coffee. "It's fine."

"You seemed alright last night, even though you were quiet towards the end. What's up?" She continues her stirring.

Wait, so she noticed? I could have sworn they were all on the verge of blacking out last night. How was she not too drunk to notice.. well, she is a black widow.

"I figured someone had to be the mom that night and I planned on doing just that. I only had a few drinks. That is until your somber ass decided to do it for me."

Ah that makes sense... if she read my mind.

I nod my head, "right. I also figured someone had to be the mom, so.." I drift off hoping that's enough of an explanation.

It's not. Because why would it be? Because it's Nat.

"Yeah, I don't buy it. You don't have to tell me, but it might help. And you might want to do it before the rest of the girls come down for breakfast."

I go to start another thing of coffee at the mention of everyone else, realizing I took most of that was in the pot.

I let out a breath. She isn't wrong. She's known everything else about Bl.. Alex, so far. Might as well keep her in the loop.

Ahh.. but.. it's her sisters.. girlfriend? That I'm talking about now. The girlfriend that got really close to me last night..

This is new territory. I don't want to send Nat over to Yelena to have her talk to Alex. I don't see where that would help any of us.

It's not like she really did anything, anyway.

It's more of what I wanted her to do and how much I felt her absence last night.

So over all, it's probably best to keep this one to myself and not to tell Nat what happened.

I just have to get over it. I can do that.

After I eat maybe I can call Lexi and see if she's free today. I could use a good distraction right about now and she's the best.

Ew. Okay. I heard myself. She's more than a distraction. I want to see her. I need to see her. Because I enjoy being with her.

I need to get my shit together.

Luckily between me taking my time to answer and the sound of other people entering the kitchen, I don't have to answer Nat at all.

"Good morning ladies," Nat greets them.

They all have responses much like mine. So I start handing out their own mugs, already feeling much better myself from the warm, bitter drink.

Soon we're all getting our plates of pancakes and adding toppings.

At first there were only noises from the sounds of forks hitting plates and mugs touching the table.

Eventually we all started to warm up to the day and reminisced about last night.

I did let myself enjoy the time with everyone, it was nice sitting back and laughing at their horrible memories of what actually happened last night.

Nat and I had to remind them of what really went on and what they really said, which only made it all the more entertaining.

We actually sat talking for awhile and I couldn't think of a better morning.

It wasn't until I was cleaning up the kitchen with Nat that she popped my happy little bubble.

"Hey, so I talked to Yelena."

"Oh?" Where could she be going with this?

"Yeah. And she said her and Alex would love to go on a triple date with us this week."

Fuck. I forgot about that. And after last night.. well it's only going to be even more awkward. At least for me. And trying to back out will only be more suspicious.

"Oh, yeah? Um.. I'll have to talk to Lexi. When we're you thinking?" I have to force the happy tone as I speak.

"Well Lena said they'd be free Saturday night. I talked to Spencer this morning and she's free. Do you think that would work?" She hands me a plate to dry off.

"Um, yeah. Should work for me as long as we don't have any missions. I can call Lexi after this to check with her."

It's bad that I'm kind of hoping Lexi won't be able to go, right?

Yeah, it's bad.

"Okay! Perfect. Just let me know what she says and I can set it up!" Ugh she's so happy about it.

I can't take this away from her.

"Sounds great."

"Of course Lexi said she was free Saturday night, showing her enthusiasm for getting to hang out with Nat and Spencer again while also meeting Yelena and Alex.

I tried to match her excitement.

I really did.

We talked for a little while before I hung up. Figure I might as well tell Nat so I'm not pushing anything back. Which would just be delaying the inevitable.

So might as well get it over with.

And work on my excitement.

Because Nat was excited.

She immediately wanted to start planning what we would do.

"How adventurous is Lexi?"

"Um.. in reference to..?" My dirty mind at play here.

"Like would she be willing to go kayaking? Or for a hike and a picnic? Or out on a boat?" Nat asks with skepticism.

Oh. Okay. That's not bad. "Oh, uh yeah. I think she would like that."

"Okay, well double check with her before I confirm it!"

I text her and of course she responds immediately, "I did. She would love to!" I try to sound happy about it.

"Great. I'll book it now!" And she's typing away on her computer.

And it all just sounds so exciting.

I guess we're going out on a boat.

All six of us out in the ocean.

In swimsuits.

Help me.