this is tom in his like $2000 jumper i thought he was stupid for buying ($2000 what the fUck, perks of being spiderman i guess) and me in my $20 target jumper :)

his banker is having a meltdown rn

it isn't even gucci

it was soft and i stand by it

ok but this is also cute as fuck

i choked on my bread at the price of that

tom said let's get this bread and he GOT that bread

tom said give me my coin and they GAVE him his coin

this is also the guy who buys a two year olds spiderman costume from a department store while surrounded by clothes

jesus christ when can i be spiderman

GAGGED

you're gonna steal it from me anyway

rubbish

tom really didn't have to go in this hard

tom said fuck it and he fucked it

tom SNAPPED

tom said here have a sip of my tea and he spilt the whole kettle

-

"Can I actually steal it?"

"You ruined your chances the second you posted that, love."

"Shit."