*******

Two months. She'd been in the hospital for two months. Two months that had changed his life forever. Changed him in ways that he had never imagined, changed for the better.

To have suffered those countless moments where everything seemed to be on the verge of collapse with the doctor's dire prediction of Mayra's death. The torture, the suspense of her surgery, he had cursed himself every second for putting her under the doctor's scalpel, where she could possibly die on table.

But the wheel of time never ceases to turn and all such haunting experiences remain forever as mere bitter memories, never to forget but never to relive too.

That particular philosophy brought a smile to Aamir's face, a skip in his step and peace in his heart. The time had come when they would finally bid adieu to the hospital. He was going to take Mayra back home. His home, his life, his world. All of which were empty without her, meaningless and dreary. And now his world was going to be filled with vivid colours again.

He clutched the discharge papers tightly in his hands as he headed back to Mayra's room. He had a little gift for her. She'd probably be ready by now, waiting for him.

He stopped mid-step, disbelief washing over him as he suddenly remembered where he was. Two months back, he had rushed a bloodied, injured Mayra down this very corridor. He had leaned against the wall waiting for a word of hope. He had spent that terrifying night here, in his clothes stained with Mayra's blood, fearful of the moment when the doctor would come out and tell him that she was gone, forever.

How painful had these two months been, he wondered, recollecting all that had happened in between. The accident, the allegation of suicide, the surgery and then the slow process of recovery. Each moment had passed as though a lifetime of uncertainty and guilt.

He shook his head firmly. He wouldn't dwell on the horrors of the past when he had a glorious future to look forward to. A blissful married life, love and happiness.

As the sorrows had passed, the joys would come.

Mentally he prepared a checklist of said joys. A honeymoon - a laidback and lazy tour of the coast of France, bathed in relaxation and romance. Sunsrise and sunset strolls on the beach, candlelit dinners and langorous afternoons in bed, simply holding her in his arms as she talked to him or slept. He wouldn't force her physically to accept him. He would shower her with love and attention, and wait. They would consummate their marriage when she was ready. And what a momentous union it would be, two hearts and bodies, minds and souls, finally joined as one. To remain one as one for all eternity.

Second - their babies. He wanted a large family. Lots of little Mayras running around, calling him "daddy", trying to hide behind his legs from their mom who would chase them to get them to take a bath. Daughters and sons who he would love and cherish, their first nonsensical garbles of sounds that he would argue with Mayra were actual words, their first steps of a walk while holding his hands tightly with the absolute trust that daddy would never let go, their first day of school, their picnins, their life...

Such was the beautiful journey etched in his mind of the days that were yet to come. He was absolutely convinced that this was how it was going to be, how it was meant to be. He would make sure of it.

The simple joys of life bought not by money or status, but by the acceptance and love of a loved one. Of a loving woman.

He reached Mayra's door smiling to himself. Today was a happy day indeed.

He opened the door partially and froze at the sound of the doctor, "Are you insane! You want to go back and live with that animal! After all that he did to you!"

Mayra's soft voice fluttered through, "I have no idea what you -"

"Oh yes you do!" the doctor snapped. "You have a damn good idea of what I'm talking about, don't you dare pretend with me! Why do you women have to be so foolish! Divorce him and throw him out of your life!"

"I don't want to divorce him. I .. I can't."

"Why can't you?" he asked incredulously. "Just imagine for a second that if you had hurt him by having an affair, would he have thought for a single moment before throwing you out of his life? He hurt you, physically, but the bottom line is that he deliberately caused you pain. Why on earth would you want to remain with him."

Mayra shook her head. "He hasn't hurt me physically."

"Bullshit!" The doctor roared. "I'm your doctor, Mayra! I've seen the scars! I've seen the marks of the belt on your back. And I know it was a leather belt. He is a depraved animal! Why are you lying for him!"

"Doctor," she replied, hesitantly. "I appreciate your concern but its between us. Please, I don't want to talk about it."

The doctor laughed at her reply. "She used to say the exact same thing you know, 'I don't want to talk about it'."

"Who?"

"My sister. She was just like you. So sweet and kind. And very naughty, that little prankster. Her husband was abusive too. We were originally from a very poor family. And in poor families jobless husbands have a favourite hobby, actually two - alcohol and abuse. I would tell her to leave him but she never listened. Until one day he..he.."

"What did he do?" Mayra whispered, afraid to hear more.

"He.. set her on fire. She had eighty percent burns on her body when she brought to the hospital because that bastard wouldn't let anyone call the ambulance. She was charred. You couldn't recognize her face. I was the doctor on duty that night. I pronounced my sister dead that night without even knowing that it was my sister."

"M..my God!" Mayra choked and Aamir felt bile rise up into his throat. "I'm so sorry."

"He still roams free you know," the doctor added bitterly. "He married again. I saw him two weeks back. He boasted that he burned my sister knowing that she was pregnant. I tried to get him arrested over and over, he always gets away. I needed legal help but I was and still am not financially well enough to get it."

Mayra wiped her tears. "I'm so sorry to hear that."

"Don't be sorry, be brave! Get out of this mess. Throw that man out of your life. Please, please don't come back to this hospital like my sister did. I don't think I could survive pronouncing another of my sister dead one more time. I.. I.. Excuse me."

The doctor fled the room, running into Aamir at the doorway. He knew that Aamir had heard everything.

"You're no better than him," he growled and walked away, wiping his tears.

"No," Aamir whispered to himself. "I'm not, brother. I'm not."

He walked into room, his head hung in shame to be compared to a man as vile as that doctor's brother-in-law. It was so painful to be compared to a murderer. He had been a bad person, yes, but not a killer.

Mayra wiped her tears hastily as he entered. She hadn't changed yet. She was still in the hospital gown waiting for the nurse to come help her change when the doctor had come. Ever since she had woken up from her coma, the doctor had tried to talk her out of protecting Aamir as she had been doing. Especially when the police would come to record her statement he would be there, coaxing her to tell them the truth, so that Aamir could be punished. Now she knew why.

How could such madness and hostility exist in this world? People could go around killing each other without any sense of guilt or empathy. They murdered babies! They burnt women! And then walked free. How could men derive pleasure or satisfaction from such barbarism? What sense of male pride was fostered by such heinous acts of cruelty and animalistic brutality? How could they look at themselves in the mirror and not see a murderer looking back at them? How could they sleep peacefully at night, not being haunted by the memories of the horrors they had committed?

"You ok?" Aamir asked her, she was looking too pale for his liking.

"I'm ok," she murmured, her mind still in shock over the fate of that unfortunate woman, and her poor poor brother who had had to receive her charred remains.

Aamir saw her feel the pain for an unknown woman, when she herself had borne quite enough trauma herself.

I've seen the scars! I've seen the marks of the belt on your back.

He needed to see it. He needed to see why he was being compared to man like that animal. Aamir walked over to her and she saw him walk all the way over to her back. She was confused. What was he doing?

Gently he pushed her plaited hair out of the way and instantly Mayra understood what he was about to do. In a moment of sheer panic she gripped his hand tightly and shook her head wildly, tears pooling in her eyes. "Please. Don't"

He looked at her face wreathed in shame. Why was she feeling shameful? It was he who should've drowned in it.

"Please, darling." He said looking directly into her pained eyes. "I need to see."

Mayra turned her head away, sobbing quietly in humiliation of her scars that were going to be exposed.

Aamir gently undid the back of her hospital gown. The sound of velcro giving way screamed in the silence of the room. He stopped midway through, didn't want to go deeper to further Mayra's discomfort. He pushed away the sides and nearly doubled over at the sight.

Her small pale back was criss-crossed with pale pink healed scars. It could easily be made out that a belt had been used. One mark below her left shoulder blade was so deep that the pattern of the leather had been imprinted and scarred that way, never to be forgotten.

Mortified at the naked truth of his madness in the days of their past, Aamir gently touched the scar, and Mayra flinched.

Alarmed at the reaction, he gently turned her around and wiped the tears from her cheeks. "Does it still hurt, darling?"

Unable to get her voice past the lump in her throat, she shook her head.

He wrapped his arms around her, pulling her into his chest, offering whatever little comfort he could. "Did.. did it hurt a lot.. when .. when I did it?"

Fresh tears poured down her cheeks and soaked his shirt. She nodded her head, her cheek rubbing against his chest. This was the only way she could communicate with him. But she couldn't tell him everything. She couldn't tell him that she could still remember the feel of the leather as it struck her skin, she could still hear him shouting at her, she could still remember the blood, the tears, the pain and humiliation. The naked anguish. The heartbreak as all of her dreams had been shattered that night when he had come home in a fit of rage while she had expected him to come home a changed man, loving and caring as a husband should be.

Aamir shut his eyes letting her pain wash over him. The pain that he himself had inflicted without thinking twice about what he was doing.

A few days after that fateful and horrible night, Aamir had ben sitting in his office thinking of the way his father had cursed and called the police but his mother had disconnected the call and made Aamir promise that he would never touch Mayra again. He was thinking of the way Mayra lay in their room, day and night, without eating or drinking , huddled on the floor in the corner of the room, shaking as he entered. For three days she had remained like that till his father had forced her to eat. But then something had changed in her. She didn't put up a fight. His father would tell her to do something and she would. Mechanically as a robot. Lifeless, like a walking corpse.

He had been thinking of all that when the phone rang.

"Hello?"

"Mr Hassan? I'm calling from Mark International."

Aamir sat up straight in his chair. He couldn't believe this was happening. "Yes, yes Mr Wilkins. This is Aamir Hassan."

"Mr Hassan, my boss has asked me to apologise on his behalf for what happened last week. He said that he went through all the folders that you had distributed to all five Directors and each one had different pages missing from them, while one had all the pages. It was wrong of us to accuse you of lack of professionalism in preparing that proposal when in fact it was a very good one, considering all the charts and figures you had put in. It was obvious someone had tried to damage the folders, for petty rivalry may be, but we were wrong to hold you to account for it. We're sorry."

Aamir's heart started beating faster. "That's okay, Mr Wilkins."

"That's generous of you Mr Hassan. But Mr Mark wanted me to tell you that he really liked the proposal you put together and he wants to sign it. Can you come to America next week?"

Aamir shot up from his seat, relieved beyond measure. "Of course I can! I'll have my secretary inform you of the dates I will be there Mr Wilkins."

"That would be great, Mr Hassan. Good day to you."

"You too, Mr Wilkins." Aamir smiled, grabbed his coat and briefcase and ran out of the office and raced back to his home.

"Mom!" he shouted the moment he stepped inside. She came out, eyes wide , and he ran forward and picked her in his arms. "We got the deal! The American deal! Now my company will gain five times more customer base!"

He quickly explained what had happened to his family. All of them looked guilty beyond measure.

His mother got a plate of sweets and gave it to Aamir. "Mayra is the reason you got this deal, Aamir. You should thank her.. and say sorry."

For the first time he felt unbelievably guilty. He had unleashed his anger at her when she hadn't been the one responsible for his loss. He took the plate and climbed upstairs to their room. He opened the door softly to find her seated at the dressing table, She was trying to apply an ointment to her lash wounds on her back. He saw she couldn't reach all of them and when she did the burn and the sting were causing her her press her hand to her mouth and scream.

He stepped in and said, "Should.. should I do that?"

The tubed dropped from her hand and she whirled around in fear to see that the monster was back. She shook her head, stood up and lowered her gaze.

"Mayra, I'm..I'm sorry for what I did. I.. I shouldn't have blamed you. We got that deal because of you. I'm so sorry." He said and showed her the plate of sweets. "I wanted to thank you, and congratulate you too."

She looked from the plate to her husband. Her eyes vacant, devoid of any emotion. She didn't touch the plate. She simply looked at him for a few minutes as of trying to read through him and he felt extremely uncomfortable. A few tears pooled in her eyes as she said, "Congratulations" and walked away.

Aamir rubbed her back as she cried into his chest. All the sadness seemed to flow out of her as she couldn't stop her tears. He kept murmuring, "I'm sorry."

*****