i feel bad for y/n. truly. it's not her fault and it's sad she believes that. i hope her friends can convince her otherwise. on a little more positive note i guess, we got confirmation from y/n that she likes finn. well, who knows what will happen next but i hope things start to pick up with her situation.

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i honestly am speechless. well first i can't believe y/n actually told the boys. i get it was an accident but i'm actually happy and proud of her for doing what she was avoiding. second, i don't know if i should, but i think i'm going to tell the police about y/n's situation. i just want her to get help and she deserves justice. i mean i don't know if i will but i want to. but i also don't want her to hate me or be mad if i did. i just- i just don't want y/n to continue thinking it was her fault. in a way i feel like it was mine. i should've been there. i should've watched her because i KNEW she was drunk. it's my fault, not y/n's. i hate myself. i'm a horrible person.

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well it's saturday. it's been one week since i've been raped. all week i've just been feeling worthless. i don't like the way i am. since last week, i just haven't been the same "me". i wish i told someone sooner. i just can't do this anymore. he's constantly in my head. what is so wrong with me? i don't want to be here anymore.

⚠️TRIGGER WARNING⚠️

!PLEASE DO NOT READ IF SENSITIVE TO SELF HARM!

i started crying. i got out of my bed and walked into the bathroom. i opened the cupboards looking for anything sharp. i finally found one of my dad's razors and took one of the blades out. i held it up to my rist shaking. i slowly lowered the blade onto my rist and pushed it in. dragging the blade to the right to make a cut. imy eyes widened with fear after seeing blood start to trickle down my rist and into the palm of my hand. traveling to my fingers and gently fell onto the ground. i quickly put the blade on the counter and tried to stop the bleeding. why would i do that? holy shit. i can't believe i would do that. i put alcohol on it to help clean it and put a few bandages on it to keep it covered and full stop the bleeding. i don't get it, why did i think that was a good idea. still crying and not knowing what to do, i knew i needed someone. my parents left to go out of town yesterday for a business trip so they aren't home. i walked back to my bed to grab my phone. i unlocked it and called my best friend.

ring.

ring.

ring.

COME ON PICK UP!

i need you.

ring.

ring.

"hello?"

hey guys, for some reason it won't let me start a conversation on my actual profile so i just wanted to say a couple things on here. i know a lot has been happening with #blacklivesmatter and #justiceforgeorgefloyd. i want to let you all know that there are petitions to sign and ways you can help pitch in to help get justice. i know the officer was finally arrested and charged but racism needs to end, and we all need to make a stand. this world needs change and we WILL create it. i'm sorry if some of you don't want to here about this but i feel that i should say something. i love you all so much and stay safe.