"On your journey, don't forget to smell the flowers. Take time out to notice that you're alive. You can only live in one day." - Ray Fearon

"… And that concludes pretty much everything that happened on our trip, Mom."

"It all sounds very suspicious, Vivian… why would someone like Randy extend a friendship hand towards us?" Mother answered, gently massaging my head which was placed on her lap, “Something definitely does not add up.”

Hearing the worry in her voice, I nestled myself against her stomach and wrapped my arms around her, basking in the much needed comfort and warmth.

After my talk with Ethan, I returned to my pack and headed immediately towards my office where Beta Jonathan alerted me with the latest updates regarding the pack.

As predicted, everything ran smoothly while we were away; nothing extraordinary or out of the blue happened. Neither were there any leads which could help us regarding Zack’s murder investigation. There was no activity at all.

Well, except for one.

Elliot had decided to leave our pack while we were at the Lycans, offering the excuse that he had overstayed his welcome. He also gave an address in case we ever wanted to reach out to him if we needed information related to the murder investigation.

It kind of bothered me how he left without saying goodbye but another part of me, given the current circumstances, was relieved. Ethan would now most likely be visiting our pack often and Elliot’s constant presence here would definitely be a cause of worry; especially because his wolf had now returned and who knew what his beast would do if Elliot was in the same room as him.

"Whatever it may be, I'm just glad that I'm away from that place, Mom."

There was a comfortable silence that followed my answer. I tightened my grip around my mother’s waist and snuggled right into her; allowing the tension of the day to release from my body.

"And what about Ethan? How are you both doing?"

At the mention of his name, my mind began to envision the celebratory dance I caught him doing which caused an automatic smile to grace my face. Even though I tried my best to hide it, I knew mother had caught me by the way her lips tilted upwards.

"We're in a good place, Mom. I am happy and… I think he is too."

She hummed in response, lightly placing a kiss on the top of my head as her soft fingers now massaged my hair. Her action caused my limbs and eyelids to grow heavier with sleep. My heart slowed down to a more peaceful beat as I fell asleep in the safety of my mother’s arms.

----

I woke up to an empty bed and the shrilling sound of my phone’s alarm. An annoyed groan left my mouth before I rolled over and pulled a pillow above my head. After convincing myself to wake up, I sat up slowly and began to wriggle and stretch my limbs. Deep down, I debated lying down on the bed again, my eyes still heavy from sleep.

After turning off the alarm, I noticed three text message notifications on my phone – all from Josh. Since we couldn’t mind link each other, and I wanted an update on Tyler’s situation, the only viable option of conversing was through the phone.

DJ’s back with the hourly report for MV.

As usual, Tyler is being a major pain in the ass but you know your DJ never shies away from challenges. So please stop worrying and go enjoy the date with your pain the ass.

And remember, just because I call you Mommy Vivian doesn't mean I want you to become one right now so… don’t forget to wrap it before you tap it ;)

The last two messages made me nearly leap from my bed, the sleep and laziness now long gone from my mind.

I had a date with Ethan.

I had a date with Ethan!

Sending a quick prayer to the Goddess, I hesitantly checked the time and realized I had thirty minutes left. It wasn’t enough considering it takes me thirty minutes to take a shower alone but I knew I had to make do.

Couldn’t you have woken me up? I questioned my wolf, the last word ending in a scream because I stubbed my pinky toe against the corner of the bed while in a rush to get to the bathroom.

“For Goddess’ sake!”

Grabbing my pinky toe, I began to hop around my room on one foot, trying to ease the pain that shot through my body.

“And miss you panicking? Where’s the fun in that?”

You do know we're supposed to work as a team!

“This is payback for when you exhausted my energy to fix the wounds we encountered during your Tarzan escapade.”

You’re never going to let that go, are you?

“As your superior counterpart, it is my duty to remind you of all the wrong and stupid decisions you make, human.”

Letting out an annoyed groan, I quickly mind-linked a few pack members to get the plan for the date in motion and then headed straight towards the bathroom to freshen up. By the time I was done with everything, it was 7:57 already.

Shit.

I hurriedly made my way out of the room and practically ran towards the border, stopping only once I was a few feet away.

Okay, Vivian. Act normal.

“Normal? That feat is nearly impossible to achieve when you’re involved. Ask something easier.” Her Highness answered.

“Don’t you come with a mute button or something?”

Upon reaching the border, I found Andrew busy chatting with Ethan which allowed me enough time to take note of Ethan. My heart skipped a beat when my eyes took in his appearance. Fuck, why does he always have to look so damn good?

Dressed in grey jeans which clung to his strong thighs, black military boots, black shirt and a grey fleece lined jacket; he looked dangerous – absolutely lethal. His tan skin, defined jaw dusted with dark stubble, and the perfect cheekbones sent shivers down my spine.

My hungry gaze shamelessly raked over him as he skimmed a hand through his unruly hair, my eyes zeroing on the rings gleaming under the moonlight. In his other hand, he held a beautiful bouquet of light pink tulips.

Ethan tilted his head upwards by an inch and inhaled deeply. A sidelong grin stretched upon his face as he moved his dangerous gaze in my direction.

Noticing the sudden shift in air, Andrew quickly turned around as well and bowed his head in acknowledgement, “Alpha.”

After answering Andrew’s greeting, I quickly dismissed him and walked towards the subject of my attention whose dark eyes were busy drinking me in.

My skin prickled with awareness, I could literally feel his eyes on my body, taking in every inch of me, lingering wickedly on my lips, the swell of my breasts and my thighs. His eyes darkened instantly, becoming hooded as something predatory gleamed in them, flooding me with unbearable warmth.

A part of me was relieved that my outfit got a response out of him because I literally threw it on at the last minute; dressed in head-to-toe black - leather skirt, oversized leather jacket, a cropped shirt and combat boots.

When I stopped right in front of him, his expression changed into one of amusement as he looked down and checked his watch.

“You’re five minutes late,” his smooth pink lips tilted up on one side into a small, crooked smile as he pushed the bouquet in my direction. “But I’ll forgive you since it is our first date.”

Oh, that voice of his will be the death of me. There was something so undeniably rough and masculine about the way it sounded, enough to make my entire body shiver.

“For me?” I gestured towards the wonderful array of tulips in his hands.

Shooting me a lopsided smile, he nodded, “If you’d accept it.”

I buried my hand inside my jacket's pocket and took something out, “Only if you accept this.”

It was a single lavender flower– to commemorate the colour of the outfit we were wearing the day we started our journey.

The surprise in his eyes didn’t go unnoticed by me. Raising an eyebrow, he stretched his arm to scratch the back of his neck. Judging by the faint blush that spread on his cheeks, I don’t think he had ever received a flower in his life.

“Thank you,” he reached forward to accept it and I returned the same courtesy by accepting his bouquet.

Whoever said men didn’t deserve to be given flowers?

After inviting him to cross the pack border, we began to move towards our destination. As we walked in sync, right next to each other, I could feel him trying to get closer to me.

He would occasionally lean towards me, lightly brush his hand against mine and then would slowly move away when tiny sparks began to ignite our skin. My entire body buzzed and was on edge from his sudden nearness.

Swallowing the lump in my throat, I tried to ignore the strange warmth in the pit of stomach.

This was definitely a new feeling I was experiencing.

Not only that, I could also feel his burning gaze pinned on me. Strangely, I felt a little intimated under his presence now, an emotion which was absent in our previous meetings.

Lifting my eyes up, I felt my cheeks heat when I saw that even when I had caught him staring at me, he kept his intense gaze fixed on me, and not looking away for even a second.

“What are you doing?” I asked, feeling self-conscious all of a sudden.

The sexiest of half smile formed across his perfect features, the subtle devilishness playing at the corner of his lips, “Just admiring.”

If it was possible, I blushed even more furiously after his reply, my heartbeat suddenly accelerating. Judging by the grin on his face, I was sure he was well aware of my reaction to his response.

“Of course he is; our mate isn’t blind. Anyone can see your tomato red face sticking out like a sore thumb in the darkness of the night.” My wolf joined.

Before I could answer back to any of them, I heard someone call out my name. Turning around, I found Kal, Zack’s best friend, holding his wailing daughter in his arms.

“Alphas,” he greeted once he reached us.

“Hey Kal, little pup keeping you busy?” I extended my hand to play with his daughter’s soft, brown hair.

Even though Kal looked extremely exhausted, he still watched his daughter with an expression akin to adoration, “More than you think. Her mom left to get some groceries and little Aubrey over here hasn’t stopped crying ever since.” There was a hint of smile on his face, “I thought a change of scenery would do her good so I stepped outside the house but of course it didn’t work; this princess only wants her mom.”

As if she understood what her father was saying, she began to wail even louder. Her tear-filled, glassy, blue eyes fell on me, then moved towards Ethan and paused. Still crying, she stretched her tiny arms towards Ethan, beckoning him to hold her.

Ethan took a step forward and extended his arms, his grey eyes never leaving her baby, blue ones, “May I?”

Kal nodded and gave Aubrey to him. My eyes were glued on Ethan’s whose gentle reaction towards the little girl had left me surprised.

As soon as Ethan collected Aubrey in his arms, the little one instantly wrapped her tiny hands around his neck and began to babble in his arms. Ethan, ever so gently, began to sooth her hair down causing her to instantly calm down. Her tiny head was now rested on his shoulder as she played with the lavender he had tucked inside his jacket’s front pocket.

“Wow Alpha Ethan, seems like you’re a natural.” Kal praised.

A sweet smile stretched across my face as I witnessed the cute scene that unfolded in front of my eyes. Ethan leaned down and kissed the top of Aubrey’s forehead gently before looking right up at me.

“She likes you,” The words tumbled out of my lips.

Our eyes never left each other. For a second, my mind began to envision a future filled with kids who had stormy, grey eyes and wavy, black hair but the thought left my mind as soon as it came.

Aubrey was now peacefully snuggled in the crook of Ethan’s neck as he continued to stroke her back soothingly. The baby tilted her head and looked up at him, reaching forward to touch his cheek with her tiny, baby hands. When he gave her a smile, she moved even closer and snuggled into him.

“Alpha Vivian,” Kal pulled me out of my daze, “I was looking forward to talking to you tonight. In fact, I was going to head for your office as soon as Lana returned. I hope you don’t mind if I borrow you for a second to talk?”

I looked towards Ethan to ask if he was okay with it. He gave me a nod and told me to go ahead, his bright, attentive eyes focused on the tiny pup who was peacefully resting on him.

Stepping a little to the side for privacy, I touched Kal’s shoulder. “Is everything okay?”

“Yes, Alpha,” he began, sounding a little nervous. “I just wanted to discuss this idea I had in my mind and if you’d give me your approval for it.”

I nodded my head, intrigued. “Yes, go on.”

“It’s about Zack,” Hearing my brother’s name from Kal’s mouth brought back the memories of the past right in front of my eyes. A time when we used to stay up all night preparing for the pranks we’d play on Kal. But now, he wasn’t here anymore and no matter how hard I tried to drop the cloak of melancholy, it always remained there, clinging to me like ivy on tree.

We miss you, Zack.

“…As you know, his birthday is coming in two days and uh… for a while the pack has been going through a lot so I was wondering if… if we can hold some sort of a carnival in celebration of his birthday?” He paused and rubbed the back of his neck, “Vivian, you already know how much Zack enjoyed having his birthday celebrated and knowing the person that he was, I am sure he would want us to celebrate this time too, considering this time he was also going to bec-.” he stopped abruptly.

To become the Alpha, he never completed.

Standing there, I recalled Zack’s previous birthdays; how he would always wake me up early in the morning by jumping on my bed and forced me to cook him blueberry pancakes, his favourite breakfast. Then later how he helped other pack members to prepare for his own birthday party, and when all was done, how he liked to be the center of everyone’s attention when the extravagant celebration began.

These past days I had been so caught up in my own life that I had forgotten how near his birthday actually was. The day he was waiting his entire life for. The day he going to become the Alpha of the North-Moon Pack. A title I now held.

“But if not, then it’s okay. I know it is a bad idea, I understand, Alph-,” Before Kal could continue, I grabbed his hand with my free one and gave it a squeeze, almost on the verge of tears.

“It’s a brilliant idea, Kal.” I corrected, causing a sweet smile to appear on his face, “I would love for you to be in charge of this celebration.”

“Thank you Alpha,” His smile grew even wider, “I promise I won’t disappoint you.”

“You’re a good friend, Kal.”

He looked up towards the sky, his eyes glistening with tears that he was trying to hold back “But not as great as Zack.”

Giving his hand another squeeze, I smiled at him, “If you need help with anything, don’t hesitate to ask me.”

He nodded back at me then paused, “Vivian?”

“Yeah?”

“You do know I’m here for you if you ever want to talk?”

My heart clenched, “I know. Thank you, Kal.”

We took a few minutes to gather ourselves and let out emotions settle down a bit before returning back to Ethan. We found little Aubrey had fallen asleep on his chest.

“Thanks a lot, Alpha Ethan. I’ve been trying to get her to sleep for hours.”

“No worries, she’s a sweetheart.” Ethan responded, carefully handing Aubrey back to her father.

Ethan waved Kal good bye as he turned around to leave us but I just stood there silent, looking at nothing in particular. My mind was still running and Zack’s smiling face was the only picture in front of my eyes.

“What’s wrong?”

Of course he had noticed the drop in my mood. I quickly reprimanded myself and fixed my behaviour because I didn’t want to ruin our night because of this. I still owed him a date.

“It’s nothing, let’s go.”

“Look at me.”

It wasn’t a request or a plea, but a command; a command that I found myself following as I raised my head in his direction.

His grey eyes narrowed and studied my face which caused me to quickly look away. If he stared long enough, I knew he would figure out that something was wrong.

Ethan’s hand flew to my chin, and forced it up, my eyes immediately finding his grey ones once again. The light from the moon nearby threw a perfect reflection, his cloudy eyes looking brighter than ever.

“I know something is bothering you, Vivian, I won’t pressure you to tell it to me but,” he gently pressed his thumb on my chin, “I want you to know that I am here if you want to talk about it, yes?”

He was being incredibly patient and sweet – something I would’ve never expected from him years ago.

“We can trust him now,” My wolf assured me.

“It’s Zack’s birthday two days from now. Kal had an idea for a celebration and wanted my permission,” I finally answered after taking a deep breath. “Two days from now, he would’ve been crowned as Alpha of the North-Moon pack,” I lowered my head, not wanting him to see the tears that were building in my eyes, “He was waiting for it. He was counting down the days. This title… it always belonged to him… I am not an Alpha. I don’t deserve to be one. Not when there was someone like him, someone much more worthy of it.”

He exhaled loudly, “Vivian, why do you keep doing this to yourself?”

“Why did he leave us so soon… he was the leader our pack deserved, and... and instead, they got stuck with me.”

“Vivian, listen to me carefully,” he leaned down so we could be on the same eye-level, his hands cupping my face, “This past month, I’ve got the opportunity to see you. I’ve really seen you – as a courageous, brave and selfless woman. You care for those around you and treat them like your family. You put their needs before your own and help them whenever they ask of you, never even hesitating for once. You give others a chance, heck you gave me a chance! You forgive people but you also carry that fire inside of you, the thirst for vengeance. You fight for what’s right, you fight for your people. And you know what all these qualities go on to reflect? That you, luce della mia anima, are an Alpha.”

My glassy eyes connected with his, “You think so?”

“I know so, tesoro,” brushing a strand of hair behind my ear, he placed a kiss on my forehead, “and I also know that somewhere out there, Zack thinks the very same.”

I felt my heart clench at his words, even my wolf felt happy to hear the words of praise from her mate. “Thank you, Ethan. You don’t know how much this means to me.”

His thumb gently wiped the single tear that fell out of my eye, “Vivian, if you want we can postpone this date. I don’t mind at all, you can go and rest. We’ll do this some other day.”

No. I couldn’t do that to him, not when it was my return to take a step forward in our relationship, not when it was my turn to make an effort.