→ Teddy bears are my best friends

→ I can do this

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Mr. Scribbles!" I say, holding up my fluffy yellow teddy bear. Daddy looks up from the novel he was reading and takes off his reading glasses, putting them on the side table. He lifts me onto his lap, as if I weigh nothing, and sets me on his knee.

"Well, hello there Mr. Scribbles." Daddy takes the teddy bear's paw and shakes it lightly. "It's nice to meet you."

A bright smile takes over my face and I hold the teddy bear to my ear, before conveying the message."Mr. Scribbles says hi!" Daddy chuckles, his rumbling belly laugh making me smile wider, if that was even possible.

"Well, then it's time to take Mr. Scribbles and this princess to bed, isn't it?" I nod, yawning on cue. I jump off daddy's lap just as he stands up, stretching his arms. I imitate his movements.

He gives me a playful glare before carrying me and Mr. Scribbles upstairs. I latch onto daddy's neck and lay my head on the crook of his neck as he enters the bathroom.

"Let's put Mr. Scribbles down now and brush your teeth, okay?" I clutch my teddy bear closer to my chest in response. I didn't want to put Mr. Scribbles down.

"Can Mr. Scribbles brush with me too?" I ask as daddy puts me down on the purple bathroom stool.

"Teddy bears don't brush silly goose! I'll hold onto Mr. Scribbles and keep him safe while you brush, alright?" Daddy suggests, gently prying the teddy bear out of my grip.

I grab onto my sparkly pink toothbrush and scrub it against my teeth until foam covers my mouth. Spitting and wiping my mouth with the hand towel, I jump off the stool quickly and reach up for my teddy bear. Daddy hands it to me and leads me to my bedroom.

I climb onto bed, putting Mr. Scribbles up before myself. I crawl towards the opening that daddy had pulled the comforter open in. Cuddling up with Mr. Scribbles right near me, I drag my pillow closer.

"Story?" I ask, expecting my normal bedtime story.

"Not today, princess. I have work early tomorrow." He tells me, pulling the comforter over my tiny body. I pout and he chuckles. Daddy bends down and places a light kiss on my forehead, swiping my hair to tuck under my ear. I put my hands up and wrap them around his head as he bends down, holding him near me for a few moments before he ruffles my hair and stands back up.

"Good night, daddy." I murmur dazed, half asleep already. I yawn again and snuggle deeper into my blanket.

"Good night, princess. Have the sweetest of dreams." He says quietly, standing up off my bed making it jut up once again. "I love you so much." I hear him whisper before shutting off the lights using the switch and closing the room door.

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Staring at my reflection in the full length mirror, I examine the third outfit I tried on. I didn't want to dress too fancy or too low and I felt as if I kept overdoing it. What do people normally wear to hang out with friends, I had no idea. The skinny high waisted black jeans jug around my waist and my green blouse fits perfectly with it, while not dragging too much attention. Grabbing a pair of earrings from the jewelry box on the dresser, I push the dangling silver earring onto my ear that my dad had let me pierce at a young age. I sling my loose brown haired braid over my shoulder and tuck a piece of loose hair behind my ear. I touch the precious silver necklace on my neck that I never took off.

I can do this.

Hearing the chime of the doorbell ring, I hop down the stairs only to realize that Eli had beat me to it. I sneak down the stairs, hoping to hear a bit of their conversation.

"-and I'm trusting you to have her back by 10 PM," Eli says in a stern voice. I duck my head, my cheeks heating up out of embarrassment. He was making it sound like it was a date.

"Yes, sir." Ryan nodded politely.

I clear my throat, a cliche way to get their attention. Both boys turn their heads my way, Eli and Ryan at the door. Ryan visibly exhales when he sees me, silently mouthing 'thank you' while Eli's head was turned.

"Be safe, okay little sister?" Eli gives me a warm look, polar opposite to the one he had while he was facing Ryan. His nod showed me that he approved of the outfit.

"Always, El." I had started calling Eli 'El' just yesterday, feeling confident. Eli had scowled at the nickname at first but seemed okay with it, making me continue calling me it.

"See you!" I scream waving, as Ryan practically pulls me to the blue Toyota car, waiting right outside the mansion gates.

Opening the door for me like a gentleman, he walks to the other side of the car and slides into the front passenger seat while I do the same in the back. The inside of the car smelled like the candle scent of an air freshener. The seats seemed fairley clean besides for the few wrappers scattered across the car mat. A cubed red dice with white strings on both sides hung near the car's top review mirror.

"Ryan's sister put it there," Jack explains, following my gaze. I smile at the thought of the cute girl I had met just the other day.

Alex sits beside me in the back and Tyler on the other end of the car. Jack holds the steering wheel from the front seat with Ryan in the passenger side seat.

"Hey girlie!" Alex calls, leaning into me and slinging an arm around my shoulder. I respond by touching her hand lightly, the one on my shoulder.

"Hey!" I greet the rest and a few echoes of hi's speak back. I buckled my seat belt and looked out the window to see my brother frowning at something on his phone. I wave at him through the window, as Jack starts pulling out of the parking space, to let him know that we were going and he looked up, pasting a smile on his face as he waved back. I saw the smile drop as soon as we turned the corner though and wondered what made him upset.

The window stays slightly open, air flowing into the car. The light breeze hits me, making it the perfect temperature. The trees and building start blurring past us as the car picks up pace, cruising on the open road. "Put the radio on," Tyler suggests. Ryan reaches over from the front seat, tilting the knob so it reaches a 180 degree angle.

Pop music fills the car, through the speakers from each corner of the car. The lively tempo immediately makes all of us dance with the music. Ryan turns his head against the headrest of the car the entire way so he faces us. "You're gonna love experiencing us boys' car tradition." He says, a mischievous look on his face. When I turn to look towards Tyler, he has an exact copy of the look, rubbing his hands together.

"Oh, I am so ready for this," Tyler smirks.

Ryan turns around again and this time, turns the radio's knob the entire way. The volume blasts, practically making the car shake. The vibrations make the seat underneath me rumble at the beat of the song.

Alex squeals and covers her ears with her hands. "Turn it down!"

Ryan shakes his head refusing, his head thrown back into the air with laughter, while Tyler has the exact opposite reaction of Alex. He reaches to the front seat over the middle divider, his hand grazing the volume knob. He turns around to gauge Alex's reaction and sees the hopeful expression on her face before smirking wider. "Nah."

Instead, he skips the knob and holds down another button with a red caution sign lining its border. A whirring noise and sudden gush of cold air makes me look around the car until I notice the sunroof. It opens slowly and mesmerizingly, letting way for air to fill the car from the top.

"Why the heck would you do that? What if it rains?" Alex asks, her voice filled with worry and she clutches my arm with both her hands.

"Does it look like it'll rain anytime soon?" Tyler scoffs, gesturing to the sunny evening weather outside. "The worst that'll happen is a bird will poop into us." Her nails dig into my skin at his reply.

"He's kidding. Chill, Alex," Jack chuckles from the front seat, noticing my grimace from the back view mirror. She cautiously lets go of my hand though she still sneaks closer to me and more away from the roof.

"Party!" Tyler shouts, swinging his hands wildly. Alex groans but a grin never leaves her face. Ryan bobs his head up and down to the beat.

The song changes to another station and this time, I recognize the party song tune playing. Adrenaline rushes through me as the singer on the radio screams out the lyrics. Not being able to hold back anymore, I start singing the song at the top of my lungs freely.

"You break my heart and I break yours," I belt out, holding a fist as a pretend microphone to my mouth. Mine lacking the tune while the singer hits the notes perfectly.

Dad had used to tell me to 'live in the moment.' It was his motto along with 'I love you' and every time I was nervous about something in the future, he would tell me that. I would give him a confused look, the most my five year old mind could comprehend, and continue whining. Dad would just chuckle and whisper that I would understand one day.

I had never realized what it truly meant till this moment. Without thinking of the impacts and caring about anything else, I sing through the entire song, enjoying the moment in front of me right now. I was with four of my friends living in the normal life of a teenager which a few years ago I had never thought was possible. Seeing all those boys and girls at my old school in groups with their friends, laughing and walking shoulder to shoulder, I always felt alone. But at this moment, I was those kids. I was here having the time of my life and no one was going to stop me today.

"This is my life, my decisions!" My hand went to my heart as the lyrics managed to weld their way into my emotions. A stray tear of happiness dripped down my cheek before I realized it was even there. Ryan gave me a look of concern and question in the rearview mirror when he caught my eye which I replied to with a smile. And for once, it wasn't a fake smile. I wiped it away quickly as Alex bumped shoulders with me with her crazed dance moves.

The song came to an end with a string of a guitar.

"Damn girl, your voice is smoking!" Jack throws out towards me from the driver's seat.

I pretend to bow through my seatbelts. "Thank you, thank you."

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"And I win again!" Tyler cheers, pumping his elbow in a victory dance. Three games of bowling and Tyler had won every single one. The bowling alley was close to empty this late. The woman at the front desk glares at us, probably waiting to shoo us out in the next five minutes so she could close up the lanes. Another group of late night players, probably professionals, were bowling at the last lane, knocking down every pin every bowl. Alex and I sat on the plastic seats near the ball cupboards while the boys all stood on the platform, observing and criticising each other's bowls.

Alex and I were on a team the first game while Tyler, Ryan, and Jack the other. The scoreboard above the bowling lane showed multiple 0s on the second row, ours, and strikes or spares at nearly every square on the top row.

The ball seemed to have a mind of its own every time I bowled, always ending up in the gutter or knocking one side pin at most. Ryan had tried guiding me on a bowl but I had managed to trip on the ball while rolling it, making us both fall on top of each other. My cheeks were as red as a tomato by the time we left the platform. Alex, Jack, and Tyler's whistles from the seats didn't help my case. By the end of the first game, I had come to the conclusion that bowling just wasn't my thing.

Alex and I had given up halfway through the second game, going to get food at the small canteen on the side of the alleys. Ordering two large nachos, we both sat on the tables snacking while cheering the boys on. It was peaceful sharing until Tyler decided that he 'deserved' some chips too. Soon, it just turned into a competition of who could eat the most nachos. It was clear who won once Tyler stuffed three large chips into his mouth at once.

Jack and Ryan ended up bowling for us on game three, Tyler betting that he could win against them two solo. Somehow, he kept his promise, winning the third game of the night.

"I hate this game," Ryan grumbles.

"Yeah, yeah. You just hate it cuz you suck at it," Tyler waves him off. We put the balls back on the racks and Alex throws our containers away in trash bins responsibly. The front desk lady exhales in clear relief, a smile filling her face as she excitedly waves us out, pointing towards the exit like a maniac.

"Please, please. The exit is this way, have a great night," she ushers, clearly in no mood to deal with five teenagers. The boys deliberately take as much time as possible, stepping out the door in small steps. The lady has all the lights off of the desk before we barely make it out the door.

Ever the gentleman, Ryan holds the bowling center's door open for us all. "Ladies first," he extends an arm with a smirk, pushing Tyler and Jack out of the way in the process. Alex and I exit and Ryan abruntley lets go of the door, letting it swing closed with Tyler and Jack still inside.

"Hey, why don't you hold the door for us?" Jack protests, scowling at Ryan and rubbing his nose where the door had smacked against it.

"Do you look like a lady?"

Jack mumbles colorful words under his breath. "I'll get you back," he threatens before going back to nursing his nose.

The chilly night air hits us at full gust the moment we exit into the parking lot, making me regret forgetting my jacket in the rush. The crescent moon and rusty flickering street lights provide the only sense of light and warmth. Alex and I huddle closer to each other, our shoulders touching in an attempt to get some body heat.

A new block of wind makes a fresh set of leaves blow from side to the other of the parking lot. The cold air against my exposed neck makes me shiver, the hairs on my skin standing up. I rub my hands against my bare arms and blow on them.

"You cold?" Ryan asks, looking back at me.

"Kinda," I reply, rubbing my hands together vigorously now. He walks slower a few steps and matches my pace. He shrugs off his blue jean jacket in a swift movement, putting it over my shoulders comfortingly. "No, no, it's okay."

"Take it, Jess. You're shivering." He takes my hands when I try to take it off, refusing to take 'no' as an answer. I give him a grateful look, my shivering coming to a slow stop. I bury myself into his jacket as much as possible, his jacket matching the scent of him. He makes no attempt to let go of my hand and I don't either, though his touch manages to send mysterious tingles down my spine. Alex suggestively wiggles her eyebrows at me once she catches my eye. I roll my eyes in response, though I feel my cheeks heating up yet again.

"Aww, look at Ryan baby being a gentleman," Tyler coos, pinching Ryan's cheek while Ryan removes his hand from mine to flip him off. I immediately miss the warmth of his hand.

"Let's get pizza," I announce in an attempt to distract myself and also loving this night too much for it to end.

What was going on with me I had no idea.

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