《BULLIED》Submission 805

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Hey so I'm in 8th grade and I am bullied all though people might not know that they are bullying me but they are. I guess it started in Kindergarten. This girl came up to me and said "Will you be my friend" of course I said yes she became (friend 1) . I all ready had a friend (friend 2) who was a boy, and we found another girl (friend 3) to join us Over the years we were best friends. At recess friend 1 was the boss she got to choose what we did. So we all followed friend 2 would go hang out with his other friends so we would all just do what ever with out him. Then in 7th grade when in got my own iPod i started texting friend one. Then a new girl came and friend 1 started drifting over to her. at first it was fine then it was bad. Mean while friend 3 started being a bitch she was trying to be popular and no one liked it.so everyone started not being not being her friend I was still nice but not her best friend. I was starting to be left out of thing. People would talk over me at lunch i would try to talk to people and they would just ignore me. Friend 1 would text me asking why i was drifting away and how she tried so hard to be my friend in kindergarten. I felt bad for her and apologized to her. I would try to tell her how she and everyone at lunch would ignore me. All she told me was that i wasn't putting myself out there enough. after that i went and sat with the 8th graders. then she was mad because i wasn't sitting with her at lunch i at lunch. she told me to come back so i did that didn't work they still ignored me. i was so excited for summer. that meant hanging out with my sisters doing summer training for skiing and joining swimming. over the summer i tried to talk to my friends but they all ignored me. things got worse over the summer i started falling into depression. i would have dreams of the boys in my grade and being happy but would wake up sad and depressed again. then i started feeling feelings for not only boys but also the girls i would have some talks with my best friend that was like a sister to me a i asked if she ever thought she was gay and if she thought i was gay and if she thought being gay was wrong she said that it was okay and she didn't care what i thought about being gay of lesbian. i thanked her but couldn't stop thinking about it. School started and it was horrible i thought being an 8th grader was supposed to be good it was not good at all. i tried to sit with the popular girls at lunch and talk to then in the halls and before class. they all ignored me.i stopped sitting with them at lunch because they ignored me and would talk smack about everything. they were bitches. meanwhile in math friend 2 would start touching me it was bad because i though he was my friend. i would tell him to stop and he would keep doing it. i told one of my swimming friends and they tried to help it didn't work. meanwhile i am still stuck in this position and still half depressed i tried to surround my self by positive people. its still not helping i want to know what can help me and know that my story is not that bad but i don't know what to do lately i have been thinking suicidal thoughts and i really need help.

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: Can you please help meas much as you can? I could really use it.

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