My mum and I moved from Australia to England, where she met my step-dad. We moved to England after my real dad died in a car crash back in our hometown in Brisbane, Australia. My step-dad was a alcoholic and a drug abuser. He came home most nights and abused me and my sister, but one night, my stepdad came home while me and my mum were watching TV, and he pulled out a gun and shot my mum in the head. Shortly after he murdered my mum, I was raped by my step-father. I was only 6, and witnessing and experiencing such things at a young age made me depressed{clinically}.

I put on a lot of weight and didn't care about my appearance anymore. My sister and I moved in with my auntie, which wasn't the best because my auntie was poor and didn't have a lot of money to buy us food or clothes. I was bullied in school because of these factors, and I then started isolating myself from others. I went days without showering because I would have rather been alone in my room than risking to have a 30 second conversation with my sister. I also started self harming and writing or drawing things with razors into my skin(not one of the most attractive things to see in my skin to this day).

In 2010, my sister and I had tickets to see the x-factor live. When I went into her room to tell her we were leaving, it felt as if the world had fallen beneath me because I saw my sister hanging from the ceiling. She was still alive when I walked in, but only for 2 seconds. That's when I lost it. I gained 4 pounds every week for 2 months, and never showered or brushed my teeth, because I felt as if there was no point. I was called fat, ugly, stupid, horrendous and trampy by several people on a regular basis when I went to school.

After so long, the name calling had gotten too much, and whenever I looked in the mirror I saw nothing good about myself. I always picked out my imperfections(which i had a lot of), so I eventually started extreme-dieting, and took tips from online 'blogs'(pro-ana). Of course, after 3 months I had become anorexic, and was 2 stone underweight for a person my age. I was very weak and had no strength to do basic everyday tasks, such as getting dressed or getting into bed. My auntie was too poor to afford for me to get treatment, so she abused me on occasions when I refused to eat food. I came to school with bruises, and had to lie about the truth. I almost died due to how underweight I was, and was send to a hospital for 6 months to get better, but I ended up staying longer than wanted because I didn't co-operate with the people there. After I got out the hospital, I met the love of my life, who accepted me for who I was and for my past.

In my last year of secondary school, I "officially" lost my virginity(ignoring my step-dad situation), which led to my boyfriend and I being called 'easy' and being made fun on. The months following were some of the best and worst months of my life. I found out I was pregnant with a little baby girl, but my boyfriend also died in a boating accident. My father was also released from prison, and I earned enough money through the job I was working for to move to back to my house in Australia where my mother and I lived for the first few years of my life before my father died. I gave my auntie money on a regular basis to thank her for the help she gave to me and for caring for me when i was at my lowest of times, and I also met my new boyfriend, who is caring for me and our baby Joy, and our new baby bump.

Moral of the story, don't let bullies win because it isn't worth it in the end, and it certainly isn't worth almost dying. Try to get through it because in the end, you'll be rewarded for your fight. If you feel like all hope is gone and you should give up, try to remember my story because I felt the same way, but I'm now one of the happiest people ever.

Stay Strong, you're loved and wanted.