My story isn't as bad as everyone else's. But everybody handles things differently.

(Im gonna name myself Cat in this story.)

It started in third grade.

I was overweight at the time (I still am). Girls in my school could either wear skirts, shorts, or pants. I chose skirts because I was a girly girl.

I felt the need to pull my skirt up a little higher, because it made me feel like my stomach was hidden. I had a friend, let's name her 'BULLY 1' we met in like what? Grade one?

Yeah, moving on.

Generally, she was mean to me. I had to hold her lunchbox for her and walk behind her. If I ever spoke out of turn, she would glare at me and make me cry.

"You're fat."

"You're not smart."

I was a third grader, of course that would hurt like hell. Since I can't say names, I'll just say that our names rhymed. She would constantly expect me to work for her.

I was terrified of her. One of the things I wish I could change about myself is the fact that I forgive way too easily. Everyone took advantage of me.

I hated it.

"Cat, can you do this for me?"

"Do this for me."

"Get lost."

"Why are you so fat?"

It was so frustrating.

And then, one day, we decided to play hide and seek. They always made me the seeker because I, apparently, was too slow. When I bent down to pick my lunchbox up, BULLY 1 came over to me and pulled my skirt down. I was still wearing my leggings, but it was still very see through.

EVERYONE laughed their asses off.

My crush started chanting,

"She's so fat! She's so fat! When is she going to explode?"

I pulled my skirt up and ran to the bathroom. I sobbed for hours.

Barely anyone knew my name, everyone just recognized me like this,

"Oh her? The girl with the big butt? The one that showed her panty to everyone?"

Its sickening.

Oh, I never told my family.

Then, grade four rolled along. I'm quite tall for my age, so I was seated in the back.

I love sitting at the back. But I hate sitting next to people.

I feel extremely self-concious. I was still over weight.

But I Started wearing pants. Over the summer, I changed completely.

I became a tomboy. And I'm glad.

I was seated next to a girl, who was new. Let's name her 'FRIEND 1'.

Later, when recess came along, BULLY 1 summoned me. She found someone new to play with,

"Get lost, you're just some lame fat person that can't even score 100 on a test."

She was right. I let the bullying get to me. I started failing all my classes.

Especially math.

I just nodded and left.

I hate how I let her push me around.

As I sat down alone and daydreamed recess away, FRIEND 1 came up to me,

"Wanna hang out with me?"

"Yeah. Sure."

Best. decision. Ever.

BULLY 1 eventually started bullying FRIEND 1 in order to get me back. She bullied me online and kept sending me hateful threats whenever I passed.

Apparently, her new friends weren't as sweet as me.

But FRIEND 1 and I kept growing closer.

Later, BULLY 1 moved away to Canada, so all went well.

Let's skip forward to grade five.

It went well, I think. I had a crush, but obviously I never told anyone.

Anyways;

We had music every Tuesday. We always learnt the recorder, so it was pretty boring. Occasionally, some boys would turn around to talk with some girls, whenever they caught my eye, they would gag and turn around laughing. Sometimes, if anyone forgot a pencil, they would come and ask me. When I silently gave them the pencil, they would literally take tissues and wipe it before using it.

Rumors were spread about me; but I never knew. FRIEND 1 kept getting in fights trying to defend me And prove that those rumors weren't true. She refused to tell me what they were. Soon, I started dieting, I didn't want to be unattractive, I wanted to be the person that boys really want to talk to.

I wanted to be different.

FRIEND 1 didn't approve of my dieting.

"You're too young for that," then she would hug me.

"It's normal for kids our age to be like this."

She was fit and very athletic, of course she didn't understand my urgency. She would offer playing catchers with me as a form of exercise. I always declined that.

I was afraid she might think my fat was jiggling or something like that.

One day, some boys surrounded me while FRIEND 1 went to the bathroom. They took my stuff and opened my folder. I loved drawing so I had a lot of embarrassing drawings in there.

FRIEND 1 and I always drew things together.

They made fun of it and kept laughing. I didn't even try getting it back, I just kept standing there trying to keep my composure.

I mean, if I did move, they might insult me even more. I can think of a few things that they might've said,

"Oh! The hippo is coming!"

"Prepare for the tsunami!"

Honestly, it stings when girls insult you, but it burns and stains when boys insult you. (Well it depends on your sexual preferences, I'm straight.)

I started crying and I silently walked away from them and they called me even more names.

I never reported them. They were all the teacher's pets.

Also, when the teacher would call on me to come up to the front of the class and answer a question, boys would whisper as I walked past them,

"Her butt is way too big. Is that even normal?"

I started panicking whenever the teacher said my name after that.

Let's skip forward to grade six.

On the first day of school, a girl, let's name her 'marshmallow'.

She came up to me and started poking me. I stayed silent and tried moving away.

"You're right!" She turned to a few girls,

"She is soft!" Everyone in the class started giggling.

Later on,

Another new girl showed up, BULLY 2. As usual, everyone is curious about the new girl. I avoided her because she was surrounded by people.

I'm still very shy and self-concious.

"Hi, what's your name?" She came up to me.

"Cat" I whispered.

She nodded and got everyone's attention,

"If you don't lose some weight," she made a round shape with her hand,

"You might pop."

Tears pricked my eyes and threatened to fall if I blinked.

I looked down and whispered a barely Audible "okay." That's when the 'cool group' came up to us and started snickering,

"Did you tell BULLY 2 about cat's panties?"

They were referring to my traumatizing incident in grade three.

I immediately got up and started running towards the bathroom.

"Cat! Your fat is jiggling!"'they called after me.

I stayed there until the teacher came in and forced me into class.

(I got a detention)

FRIEND 1 and I weren't in the same class that year.

But i never told any of my friends, I was too embarrassed.

I would suddenly just break down crying in front of my mom. But she would never believe me. As a kid I would lie to my mom for attention, but this time I wasn't. My older sister never even gave shit.

"I'm talking to my friends, get lost." She would always say.

The cold hands of depression curled around my heart. My anxiety was way too much.

I would always feel like people were looking at me and laughing. I would tighten my belt way too much, in order to make my stomach appear smaller. I just wanted all my extra fat gone.

I did whatever I could.

The marks of my belt would show on my stomach and it made me feel horrible.

Over the years, the bullying subsided.

But not completely.

I was still picked last in P.E.

I was still laughed at.

I was still neglected.

I barely talked to my family anymore.

I had fights with my mom.

My dad yelled at me for being distant.

My sister didn't give shit.

I know it's because they love me and were worried about me.

All I did was talk to my friends.

I loved drawing. Also, I loved writing stories, as well as poems.

I would let all my feelings out when I drew, or wrote anything.

In grade 8, I was seated at the back of the class next to BULLY 2.

Hell, I never talked to her.

She would poke me, and I'm quite ticklish. So i would squirm uncomfortably. Then she would put her head on my shoulder.

I never said anything.

Later, it started raining, and there were puddles everywhere. Some boys came up to me, I started backing away when my foot went into a puddle. I didn't fall, but both my feet got wet.

"Terrorist." They all laughed.

I'm a muslim. You got a problem with that? I'm proud. I'm proud as hell! Muslims aren't terrorists. The people who terrorize claim to be muslims, but are they really?

Our holy book says that harming one another is forbidden.

So if they don't follow the holy book,

How are they muslims?

That's exactly what I said to them.

They looked silent and started laughing.

It's not funny.

One of them reached out to push me.

I hate it. They push me all the time. They hurt me all the time. They touch me all the time.

I grabbed him by the wrist and stayed there, glaring at him. At first he looked surprised and then he looked amused.

Thats when I lost it.

I squeezed his wrist really hard. And then I let go, pushing him with all my force.

I know I'm stronger than them, I just don't want to get hit back.

He had this look of pain when he got up,

"Stay away from me. All of you." And then I walked away.

Word got around fast. Lots of people cornered me and tried to see if I would lash out at them as well.

I stayed silent and walked away from them all the time.

And if they tried to stop me by any means of physical contact, I'd stop; and when they finally let go, I'd start walking again.

I lost 2 KGs and it was making me feel confident. FRIEND 1 and I were still inseparable. I loved her and she loved me back.

But there was still one person that kept trying to piss me off.

BULLY 2.

Whenever she said anything or got too close, I always furrowed my eyebrows and glared at her from the corner of my eye.

She hated that.

"Why're you so mean to me?" She poked me again and gasped,

"Have you gained even MORE weight?"

I stayed silent.

Remember how i said my feet got wet?

My shoes started stinking after that. BULLY 2 didn't miss it.

"You smell bad." She shifted and covered her nose.

I just nodded and looked in front of me.

I changed my shoes the other day and even sprayed some of my mom's perfume.

She scrunched her nose up,

"Do you like, live in a garbage can?"

I didn't say anything.

Now, let's go to the present,

I'm going to grade nine.

I moved away a few months ago.

BULLY 2 kept asking me when I was leaving,

"I'll miss you!" She clapped her hands,

"Now I'll have to sit alone." She kept smiling and telling me that she'll miss me.

I'm not stupid. You just want to get rid of me.

Like I care.

Well; forgetting about her-

I miss my three best friends like hell. They always loved me. They make me feel good about myself. Apparently I'm funny and smart. The one thing that's hilarious is that they all have the same name! So I had to make nicknames for them XD

They told me to kick some ass. I've lost some weight,( but not enough) and I'm really happy. I can go out in public without feeling scared. (Most of the time)

I don't exactly have a lesson to teach you, but;

You're somebody's reason to smile. I know it may seem all cliché saying this, but it's true.

PM me anytime. I'd love talking to you!

Lay all your problems on me; I'd be more than happy to listen.

The person you see in the mirror is you. And you belong to yourself. Not anyone else.

Try to understand;

Your mirror where you see your flaws. Not in anyone else's eyes.

You decide what you don't like.

Not anyone else.