I was bullied from year 3 - 5/6 (grade 2 - 4/5).

In year 3, they mixed up our classes and my 3 best friends went to 2 other classes and I was left all alone.

The summer before I went to my parents country, Bangladesh, and I got a really bad mosquito bite on my left cheek. It healed before school started but it left a huge mark and it looked awful.

On the first day of school, I tried to hide it using a sheet of paper, my hand, my hair.

I confided in one of the girls from my previous class about it and she told me to just leave it and no one will care. So I did.

Then this new boy appeared out of nowhere. He was really rude and even too immature for year 3? How is that possible?

Anyways, he freaked out when he saw me and spread a rumour to everyone saying I had a skin disease!?! The bad thing is, everyone believed him! The bad BAD thing was, around Christmastime of that year, he left the school, so if he didn't come in the first place maybe this wouldn't have happened. Also everyone kept up with the charade that I had a disease and they wouldnt come near me, touch me, touch anything I've touched. They made me feel like. One of those lepers who everyone stays away from.

I did actually make a new group of friends, but 3 of 4 of them turned out to be right b**ches. one of them I do talk to nowadays sometimes.

It wasnt any better at home. My brother. My own brother, treated me like those jackàśšëš treated me. He wouldn't go near me, touch me, touch anything I touch.

(The worse thing is, he's still doing that 5/6 years later....)

And my mum had no clue of my sudden change in character. She just thought I was being an inconsiderate child and always put me down on my weight. My dad is always supportive and loving of me but I barely see him as he only comes home once a week from his work.

By year 6 I dropped my group of friends as I couldn't deal with all the drama caused by the 3 idiots, which was giving me mild depression. I didn't know at the time as I was only 8/9/10 years old.

After I had no friends, I somehow felt free and serene. But that just caused more bullying my way.

Everyone took it from shunning me to more extreme measures. They would write threatening notes and put it in my cubby tray, every time we peer marked, when someone 'lost' and got my paper, they would change my answers to give me 0!

My year 6 teacher was a right pain in the äss aswell. I told my parents what happened and she to me told me to not worry as I was going to year 7 and would forget all these people. My teachers said the same.

Little did they know, my mild depression was growing and growing until I suddenly started to have some thoughts. "If I died, no one would care. Everyone would be happy. My brother, my mum, my whole school"

I would constantly have these thoughts and these urges to grab a knife and..... But then I would think. "God, Allah, will not be happy with me. I could suffer for 3/4 years but why suffer for eternity?" Then I would drop down and just bawl my eyes out.

I'd gotten close to grabbing a knife to my wrist multiple times. But I never cut.

I would constantly go through this then after year 6 finished I felt like I'd been let out of my cage! I spent the whole summer preparing for year 7 on how to speak to people as I lost all my confidence and social skills to talk to people.

*fast forward to now*

Year 7 was way better than any of the years before but I still didn't really have my friends.

Year 8 came and I found a group of friends who wanted to be my friend. Or do they?

It's the summer before I start year 9 and I'm still not sure if my friends are friends because they like me or they pity me?!

I geuss I'm just not for that friendship/happy life....