What am I supposed to think now?

Where are all of my friends who said they loved me and would never leave me? Apparently it was a joke.

They keep saying they love me. Yet, if they really loved me why would they make me feel this way?

It feels like everything is crumbling down all around me. I'm not standing and I'm not dead. Yet, I am wounded. I am close to falling and it's just another piece before I only have a limited time.

My best friend was with my friends who said they loved me today. She ignored me when she was around them I don't think she meant to but she did. I told her how it made me feel. I think I shouldn't have. I asked her to please not leave me now and she said she wouldn't. However, she said she would text me back later because she is thinking.

She actually made me happy. What if the insults and who people want me to be get to me? What if she leaves me? How will I survive all of those insults and names people call me? How will I even cope with the fact she left me if she does? How am I supposed to feel happy again? Please...help me.