I wasn't bullied at first, I was a normal pre-schooler who played with friends and didn't have a single care, but the next year a new girl came and formed the first "clique" and for a bunch of 5 year olds it was very complex! Needless to say she didn't see me fit to be in any clique of hers so my "friends" turned on me for her and began to pick on me. They tormented me they would call me "fat" "ugly" "pregnant"some boys even asked me not to eat them. You see I had just undergone a surgery to remove my tonsils which were poisoning me and causing malnourishment, so when the surgery was done I regained ALOT of weight. This gave her, the skinny beautiful 5 year old, more than enough reason to ruin my life. This torment continued for years each one worse than the last. I would force myself to vomit each day just to get away from her and when the teachers got fed up with me they punished me even though I would tell them everything they never understood. Even when a boy told me to die he cried his way out of punishment, the teacher never spoke to me again...I guess they expected it to blow over. Not to mention one teacher even bullied me, calling me out in front of class everyday making, me feel worthless. But besides it all I still tried to fit in. One day, on an exceptionally good day, I spoke to that beautiful skinny girl, I don't know why I just thought I should... and she spoke with me, other girls came by and joined in. I felt comfortable talking being acknowledged! Then I told them I had to go to the rest room... They held me down telling me they would harm me if I screamed they did this until I peed myself and then let me go. Now teachers were concerned my parents finally jumped in, but nothing was fixed until she moved away a year later. However that just had to be when puberty hit and I am a dark haired girl with dark arm and leg hair, which I concealed the best I could until I could shave, but of course someone saw and I was dubbed "Bigfoot" "Gorilla". One boy even called me disgusting and lifted me by the front of my shirt leaving scratches on my chest before throwing me down when I tried to speak with him another tried to kill me by holding me down and rubbing a flower I told him I was allergic to in my face.... I thought it would never end; they always found something to call me someway to break me. Then I got lucky, my best friend noticed me, all the cliques pulled her in and exchanged her for about two years and when they decided they didn't want her they gave her to me. She taught me not to care and to be myself. She didn't call me fat or ugly she treated me like a real human and things got better for me and have been for a long time. However all those named still tag me today no one cares to call me them but they still sting when I see pretty girls. I still feel ugly when I look at myself and can feel the sting from old wounds and going into highschool with beatiful girls changing in the same room as me made it so much worse. At age 15 I began to starve myself, I was killing myself and to think ONE girl started this at age 5. I didn't understand how bad it was until my friend found out. She wouldn't speak to me. That day was when I had my first real meal in a while... I am now, eating, dressing myself nicely, I even compete in beauty pageants, and even though I have bad days I can look at myself again. And to anyone out there who may be doing this to themselves remember what they say hurts it hurts really bad but what hurts worse is when you can't look at yourself and smile anymore. my little sister is having this happen to her right now and I wish I could kill all of those brats... but I remember "Love and be loved."

I love you all

please don't bully

please don't self harm

please dont give up because maybe your little sister needs you