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A 13 year old Sona was sitting in the park all alone, she didn't want to go home, scared to show her mother her test paper in which she had gotten a big zero. She played with her inhaler in the pocket of her jacket, it was a new one and she was actually mesmerised with it.

"Lalalalalala," she sang very badly just to pass her time. "I am the queen. I am the king. What am I even singing?"

She sighed, kicking her bag pack with her shoe as she sat on the swing, moving back and forth slowly. Should she lie to her mom? Should she tell her they didn't get the marks for the math test? But her mom would get to know from Tarni's mom! They always talked everyday!

"Stupid, stupid, stupid," she knocked on her own head. "Think of a way. . . . come on Sona. . . . think of a way."

"How much ever you knock no one will open the door to your brain."

Sona glared at the boy who spoke. "Go away Abhay bhaiya, you are a meanie!"

The boy in return only laughed at her, knocking her head too hard that made her wince. "Got zero again?"

She nodded with a pout, tugging her braids.

"Don't you eat almonds everyday?" he asked.

"I do!" she gasped. "They don't work! Abhay bhaiya you lied to me! How come you get full marks when you eat almonds while I don't?"

"Maybe you are eating different ones," he said after a long time of contemplation.

"Then I will ask Tarni to bring me the ones you eat everyday!" she said.

". . . .Or maybe your brain is so fried that they aren't working on you," he grinned.

"Hey!" she yelled, her cheeks puffing up. She rammed her head into his chest like a bull but he hardly moved from her strength. The 15 year old was only amused at the girl's antics, it was clear in his dark eyes that smiled with his lips.

"Dummy," he pressed his index finger on her forehead and moved her away, she kicked her legs to run forward but everything was futile. "You need to learn tables properly again."

"Why do I need to learn tables properly for factorisation?" she screamed.

"It's because your basics are clearly not strong," he flicked her forehead that made her wince, she rubbed it with a glare on her face.

"Teach me na, please!" she immediately clung on him an he jerked her away.

"No!" he retorted with a glare of his own. "I can't teach silly brats multiplication tables, especially when they are in 8th grade."

"Abhay bhaiya!" this time she kicked his calf.

"Hey!" he pinched her chubby cheeks very hard, she whined at the pain as she tried to pry his fingers off. "I will tell your mom you are going around hitting people."

"I only hit you!"

"I am people!"

"No, you are a person! It's singular, stupid!"

"Did you just call me stupid, you dummy?" his mouth was agape, a hint of smile laid in his eyes as he narrowed them at her.

Sona grinned a mesmerising smile, she joint her hands together and spoke very softly. "Abhay bhaiya, please speak to mumma for me."

"No way!" he laughed, wondering where she got such ideas from.

"Please, please, please," she tugged on his shirt, making puppy eyes as she tried to bewitch him. She thought if she would act cute and loving he would fall for it, he always did when they were little. So what was wrong in giving this a try? She knew if Abhay spoke up for her her mom wouldn't scold her a lot, maybe just a little but not so much that she would start bawling her eyes because she couldn't eat chocolate for a whole month.

"Why should I?" he asked, almost tauntingly. "What will I get?"

"Abhay bhaiya," she held on his arms as she swayed it with a pout. "Please, please. I wouldn't hit you anymore."

He raised an eyebrow at her, still laughing at her amusing behaviour. "No."

Sona garnished her teeth, it was enough now. She had asked him nicely and he just stood and laughed at her saying no, no and no. She kicked his shin again that made him yelp.

"You brat!" he glared at her.

"You are such a big meanie, Abhay bhaiya!" she cried out in frustration as her small arms wildly moved in the air. She felt really aggravated, what will she do if her mom stopped her dad from getting chocolates for her? What will she do if she got herself whopped on her butt with her mom's slipper? She really didn't want to cry now!

"Abhay!"

From the end of of the road a boy called him out, there were many other boys of similar ages near him, equipped with cricket bats. In fact they were also wearing school jerseys meaning the all belonged to the team.

"We have practice now!" he yelled on top of his lungs. "Jaldi aa, chutiya!"

"What's chutiya?" Sona asked innocently.

"Don't say that word ever again!" Abhay repented her instantly. "It's a bad word."

With that he started walking away. Sona called him out, almost tripping over a rock and stubbing her toe. She didn't see her inhaler flying out of the pocket of her jacket.

"Abhay bhaiya! Wait!" she yelled, she wanted to run behind him but he was already far away.

That was when she felt her chest tightening. She frowned, her fingers searching her for inhaler that wasn't there anymore. She coughed, why was she suddenly getting an attack? That never happened before. She turned around trying to search for it but her eyes couldn't focus on anything with the pain pushing her chest to burst open.

"Abhay bhaiya!" she yelled as the pain increased.

He turned around and she felt relieved. She clutched her chest and sunk into the ground.

"I am not falling for your tricks this time!" he laughed and then jogged away.

Leaving Sona all alone at the empty park.

🦋🦋🦋

When Sona woke up she heard the sound of incessantly beeping and people crying. With both of them in the mix she only felt more annoyed, she touched her chest it still ached a little.

"How are you feeling, beta?"

She looked at the man in a doctor's coat. She tried getting up but winced. "It still hurts."

"It will hurt for sometime," he said. "You might need to be in the hospital for another week."

Sona looked around the place, everything was white and a machine next to her kept beeping. She had never been here before, she didn't like this place, it made her feel scared.

"Your parents are outside," the doctor sensed her apprehension.

Just then her mom came bursting open, her face completely wet as she cried. Sona was hugged into suffocation. "Oh Sona! I was so worried! You stupid brat!"

"Mom!" Sona tried to push her away.

"Now, now," her dad said. "You are making her feel uncomfortable."

"Papa!" Sona willingly spread her arms for a hug, tears in her eyes. "What happened, papa?"

"Oh, paari," she nested against her dad's chest. "We were so worried. The maid was just going back home after working and she saw you, she immediately called us and we rushed you to the hospital."

"I-I lost the inhaler," she sniffed, sounding a little scared that she might be scolded.

"It's okay, it's okay," her dad rubbed her back. "The attack was unexpected. You have never gotten one like that before."

As Sona was recuperating the whole week many people came to visit her, even her uncle from Delhi. Tarni came almost everyday after school, even her parents did. Some kids from the neighbourhood came too and everyone brought so many chocolates for her that she felt that it wasn't that bad that she was away from home.

"Mumma," Sona twisted her blanket as she curled her toes. "I got zero in maths."

"What?" her mom and dad had been sleeping with her on the floor everyday, right now she was cutting her an apple.

"I got a zero in math," she spoke a little louder.

"Who cares about that," Sona was shocked at her mother's reply but she smiled secretly as she finally felt relieved. "You better get well soon before you get a beating."

Her smile immediately fell.

"Why did Abhay bhaiya not come?" she asked with a frown.

"I don't know, beta," her mother sighed. "He's been troubling his mother a lot lately."

Unknown to Sona, Abhay came everyday to the hospital. He sat by the waiting area in front of her room as he watched people come in and go by but he never gained the courage to visit her.

He blinked his eyes, it was his fault that she had to stay here. He could've helped her, if he had not being crazy about playing with his friends or thinking that she was fooling around with him again, he could have helped her and she would have been okay.

"Her asthma has gave sever," he had heard the doctor say.

It was because of him. Because he decided to by the most stupid person that day.

She always ran behind him everywhere like a puppy and even if it was a little annoying he actually felt happy. She would always make him angry though, faking an attack like that. It made him so scared but she had stopped doing that, hadn't she? She was more mature now than her 9 year old self, she had understood it wasn't fun to do that to gain his attention. Then why did he think she was acting that way?

He hated himself. He hated himself for being the reason she almost died.

His mother had slapped him and scolded him when he told her the truth. She said she was so disappointed in him, that she never thought he would be so careless. That's when she told him she almost died. She could have died if she was another minute late to the hospital.

Abhay's shoulders shook. He grabbed his hair as he imagined living in a world with no Sona. Without her smile. Without her following him around everywhere. Without her laughter.

He couldn't live his life without her.

"It was my fault," he looked at his hands. "I don't deserve Sona."

He didn't want anything like that day to ever happen again. He didn't want to imagine what would happen if she almost died again. He would lose it. He would die too. How could he ever live without Sona?

He was always sacred when she got the attacks and that's why he easily fell for it when she acted like she was getting one. But recently her asthma had been better. He didn't think she would get an attack. He shook his head as tears streamed down his cheek. He tried not making a sound as he cried. Why was that day the time he choose not to believe her?

He remembered she had called out his name as she clutched his chest, her figure had sank down to the ground and he had just laughed and run away.

He almost pulled his hair out as he cried, sinking to the ground with his face in between his knees. How would he ever forgive himself? Even if Sona forgave him, she was an angel after all he would never forgive himself. He would never.

That was the day he promised himself to always care take of her, even if it was from afar. For he was too ashamed to even face her himself. He wanted to punish himself for what he did and the most torturous punishment for him was to stay away from Sona. He had failed many times in that though but soon he had gotten used to it.

He didn't deserve her.

Why should Sona be surrounded by people like him when she deserved so much more? He didn't trust himself to take care of her anymore.

And even that childlike thought stuck to him until he was 20, because he was never really over about what happened that day.

So sorry for a small chap but i was almost hit with writer's block😭😭

I don't think I have written this chp well at all. I haven't done proper justice to Abhay's actions and thoughts.