《30 Day Trial Period》3.20 Day Twelve: Parker
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Originally, I was only joking that I'd miss Lizzie, but standing in the kitchen, surrounded by Camille's friends, I craved her company. All these girls were from another planet, speaking a language that didn't register. It hit me in such a crazy way that Lizzie just might be my best friend and I didn't know what to do with that revelation as if I was suddenly holding a beautiful bouquet of flowers that also spontaneously burst into flames.
Instead of thinking of these thoughts, I grabbed a black and orange cupcake and stuffed it into my mouth in one go, but the sugar hit my stomach like a nuclear bomb. I didn't want to think about the future with Lizzie. I wanted to enjoy what we had now.
If we stayed as friends, I'd have a better chance of keeping Lizzie. Being with her, I mean. So far friendships have lasted the longest for me. Not that any relationships last at all. People just break off like fingernails in painful bitter ways and I was spending my life trying to grow them back and fearing the next break.
"Parker! There you are!" someone called and my whole body cringed the moment I recognized it. The way this girl practically sang my name really tipped me off.
Gulping down the rest of the cupcake, I still had to cover my mouth as I turned around. "Norah." I slowly turned to find Norah dressed in an admittedly adorable skeleton onesie and I refrained from rolling my eyes. Norah and Camille matched. Then, the questions started rolling around my head:
Did they plan this together?
Was this an accident?
When did they become so close?
"You've got some..." Norah said, pointing to the side of her own lip.
I used my whole palm to wipe away the rest of the icing. "Thanks. So, uh you come here often?" I half-joked.
"Yeah, all the time," she laughed, but I just got more nervous, wondering if she really was around all the time. It was obvious, the sudden lack of her art class friends and the burst of the thespian crowd.
My aggravation pricked my face like hot needles. The situation drove me crazy. It was like being shouted at to "think fast", but my mind wasn't quick enough and I got a softball to the mouth and a ruined day. Clear thought burned to a crisp inside the dumpster fire that inhabited my brain.
"I'm guessing you've picked out a Halloween costume already, right?" Norah asked, standing at my side. She smiled, picking at the spread, pinching small portions out of everything. Her plate was slowly growing a mountain. "I'm sure yours is going to be amazing, but I might have you beat."
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My brow furrowed. "It's not a competition."
"Oh." She blinked. "Uh, yeah, I know. I didn't mean it like that—" She floundered like a fish flopping on the dock and that didn't know how to make it back to the water.
"How did you mean it, then?"
"I- not like in anyway way."
"I'm messing with you," I said, forcing a laugh, not because my joke didn't really exist, but for once in my life, I didn't want to be the stupid person in the conversation. Besides, my smile wasn't any faker than any single time Norah has smiled at me. Two could play this game.
She smiled uneasily and made a sad puttering laughing sound as Camille finally arrived. "Okay, grab some snacks—" At that, Norah grabbed a drink and ducked through Camille and me on her way to the living room. Camille's eyes tailed her as she disappeared around the corner. "We're gonna start the movie soon..."
The remaining girls grabbed their food and drinks, filing out of the kitchen while I took my time, debating whether or not to fill a plate for Lizzie or if she'd be down with just picking the food off mine. Then, Camille jabbed her little fists into my side, and I convulsed, half tickled, but mostly from the ache.
"Hey! Hey!" I hollered, bobbing and weaving from her wrath.
"I told you to be nice!" She seethed through clenched teeth. Now wasn't a good time to tell her, but there was some black lipstick on her front teeth and I couldn't stop staring at it. God, why was it so hard for me to be normal?
"That was like forever ago," I insisted, recalling my promise.
"It didn't have a time limit, Parker."
"Fine. I just don't get why you're so obsessed with Norah."
"I'm not obsessed." Her face flushed. "We're just friends. I think you're just afraid of not being the most important person in the room."
My ears started burning. My fists clenched at my side as our fun little game took a dark turn. "Well, I think you're afraid of not being able to control everything."
"I think you're afraid of having to share."
It wasn't about sharing.
It was about losing her completely, the way people tended to walk out of my life so easily. I was such an easy person to ditch. Unlovable. Unknowable. Gone.
Venom coated my tongue as I lashed back, "I think you're afraid of being alone."
"Yeah." Camille nodded. Her eyes bore into mine. "Aren't we all, Parker?"
We would've stood there forever, but Lizzie walked into the kitchen, stopping cold in her tracks when she spotted us, or maybe, it was the sparks flying that forced her to keep her distance to avoid getting zapped. The worry lining her face made my own chest tighten. Tonight was supposed to be fun.
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"I think you're just afraid to really try," Camille stated, ripping the last word right from under me. "I'm starting the movie in five."
She left the room, trailed by an exasperated sigh. In a wordless explanation, she looked at Lizzie with an eye roll and joined the rest of the party. Lizzie's eyes focused on me. "What did you do?"
"I didn't do anything. Why do you assume it's me?"
"Well, did you? Do anything?"
"Maybe."
"Parker."
"Hey! You should just be on my side no matter what!"
"Uh, no. if you started slashing babies, I wouldn't be on your side. If you told me you celebrated the complicated plot of Cats, I wouldn't be on your side. If you for some reason said coffee was swill, I wouldn't be on your side."
"If any of that were to happen, you have my complete permission to take me out. I've been compromised and must be destroyed."
She laughed, but it wasn't like her normal laugh. It was a bit lackluster, like a lightbulb I knew was going out. My brow furrowed and I took a step closer, putting my hand on her shoulder. "Everything alright?"
"You're asking me?" she asked with a tight smile. "You're the one fighting with Camille."
That fact toppled on top of me like a pile of bricks. Feeling my face grow hot, I shook my head and tried to deny it. "No. We're not fighting."
"It looked like fighting to me."
"It's banter."
"Okay, Parker," Lizzie said and rolled her eyes.
She grabbed my hand and dragged me out of the kitchen. Quickly, I stretched my body to nab our food and let myself be taken away. Plenty of people already crowded the couches (which included Emily, who I guessed made a couple of friends here and was too busy chatting away to notice us enter) facing the TV, but there was a small enclave of the thespians on the floor, all tangled up in each other. I met Camille's eyes as she finagled the TV. Her eyes widened and her head bobbed, motioning to Norah and the others.
I withheld a sigh.
At this rate, I was going to be completed deflated before the end of the first movie.
"Can I sit here?" I asked Norah, pointing to the spot beside her.
"Uh," Norah short-circuited before she managed to say, "yeah. Go for it."
"Thanks," I mumbled and sat down, only to realize my butt smashed into her hand. "Oh, my bad."
"No, it's fine-" she said as she turned and ended up elbowing me with her pointy arm. "Oh, sorry."
"It's cool," I said and we eventually settled down without saying another word. Lizzie took the place next to me, taking my plate in the same motion. The movie started going and the silence between Norah and I was so palpable, the girls who were sensitive to smells should've been getting a headache. I could feel the tension. I could feel the awkwardness work its way through my body like overgrown weeds.
Camille started the marathon with a classic, Halloween (the 1978 version). There was a flutter of conversations, low and indistinct with a couple of uncontrollable giggles thrown in from a few of the girls. I glanced at Norah just as she was glancing at me and I had to tightly smile to keep up appearances. She awkwardly smiled back. Our eyes lingered as we desperately tried to come up with a conversation, but I gave up and snuggled closer to Lizzie, resting my head on her shoulder. All my nerves fizzled just enough for me to breathe easy.
Glancing up at Lizzie, she was going to town on some bat cookies, eating them all headfirst. Her eyes glazed over as the movie consumed her attention. I nudged her as the camera pulled and rose into the sky, giving us a clear shot of the Michael Myers' white house and the little glowing pumpkin in the corner. "We should do that before the month's out."
"What? Murder our loved ones?"
"No." I shook my head, but not totally against the idea. "Carve pumpkins. I don't think I did it last year."
"Oh, sure," she agreed, so incredibly casual. "I've never carved one before."
My back straightened. I looked at her and expected to see a few extra heads sprout out. "Stop. You're kidding me."
"No." She shrugged. "We never did it growing up. I don't know why. I mean, we trick or treated, of course, but never that extra stuff."
An idea flashed into my head and my decision locked into an unmovable place. When I made a decision, I stuck with it to the very end and nothing could change my mind. Without hesitation, I groaned, doubling over and holding my stomach.
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Author's Note
Get ready for some cute y'all :D This book is finally boosting the fall aesthetic that consumes my life. It's getting colder and I'm ready to THRIVE. Anyways, I hope you enjoyed the chapter and let me know what you think? Do you think Camille is obsessed with Norah? Will Parker and Norah ever stop being so awkward? What do you think Parker is up to?
Here's a little doodle I did on my instagram. It's inspired by a meet the author prompt and what's in my bag:
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