The air chills me to the bone. But I don't bother to go inside to get a coat. My nightgown sways in the strong wind, as I gaze over district twelve from the high roof of my house. There is something exhilarating about feeling the cold so intensely, it makes me feel alive. I stand on the edge of the tiled roof on the tip of my toes like a bird about to take flight. And then, the words slip from my mouth before I can conceal them.

Deep in the meadow, under the willow

A bed of grass, a soft green pillow

Lay down your head, and close your sleepy eyes

And when again they open, the sun will rise.

Here it's safe, here it's warm

Here the daisies guard you from every harm

Here your dreams are sweet and tomorrow brings them true

Here is the place where I love you.

Deep in the meadow, hidden far away

A cloak of leaves, a moonbeam ray

Forget your woes and let your troubles lay

And when again it's morning, they'll wash away.

Here it's safe, here it's warm

Here the daisies guard you from every harm

Here your dreams are sweet and tomorrow brings them true

Here is the place where I love you.

Here is the place where I love you.

Deep in the meadow, hidden far away

A cloak of leaves, a moonbeam ray

Forget your woes and let your troubles lay

And when again it's morning, they'll wash away.

Here it's safe, here it's warm

Here the daisies guard you from every harm

Here your dreams are sweet and tomorrow brings them true

Here is the place where I love you.

Every word. Every beautiful word of the lullaby. Momentarily I fear I've awakened the whole village, but then I realise it's only Haymitch and Peeta who live here. Haymitch could sleep through an earthquake, as for Peeta, I hope I didn't wake him.

I spot a mockingjay flying around in the moonlit sky. A creature that used to be just a bird. I follow it with my eyes, it flutters around before settling on Peeta's bedroom windowsill. That's when I see him. Peeta stares at me out of the window, looking almost transfixed. His window is open so I shout to him. "Did I wake you?" He nods.

"I'm glad you did!" He shouts back.

"Nightmare?" I yell and he nods. "Me too. You should come over! It's nice up here!" I shout to him. He disappears from the window.

I slide down onto the tiles, tucking my knees up to my chest, hugging them with my arms. I hear Peeta fill the silence behind me as he climbs through the gape in the roof. He struggles to climb down to the edge of the tiles on his prosthetic leg, so I walk over to aid him. I help him settle on to the tiles beside me. "Your leg alright?" I ask.

"Yeah, it's okay." He assures me. We sit in silence, and it's peaceful, content. I wish I could freeze this moment, right here, right now, and live in it forever, Peeta's words come back to me.

A few moments pass, before I notice it. In his coat pocket, is a cylindrical shaped object. A bottle. I try and tilt my head to read the label, without Peeta noticing. Butterflies are released in my stomach. A bottle of strong whiskey, like what Haymitch drinks. Oh no, I think. He breaking, the notion of Peeta turning into a drunk like Haymitch makes my heart sink, I feel like I'm drowning in sorrow. "What's this?" I ask, pinching the bottle from his pocket, praying that he stole it from Haymitch to sober him up, or some other reasonable explanation. Peeta turns to face me looking ashamed, sorry. "I'm falling apart, Katniss. The whiskey, it helps." He says, and I feel like crying.

"No." I say. "You haven't fallen apart quite yet. I can fix you." I protest.

"How, Katniss?" As his question registers, I realise I don't know the answer. I lay my head on his shoulder and let my body mould against his. Peeta puts his arm around me. And it comes to me.

"Like this," I say. "You know, it takes ten times as long to put yourself back together, than it does to fall apart." I echo my old friend Finnick Odair.

"Sometimes it's okay to let yourself fall apart." Peeta says. "Just to see who's willing to put you back together."

💞