I looked on my left to find him sitting beside me looking at me with a soft smile gracing his beautiful features.

Has he been sitting here the whole time I was remembering the memory deep in thoughts?

I cleared my throat wiping the smile that I had on my face from the memory with him and asked "What are you doing here? And how long have you been here?"

"I have been here since you spaced out, I called you several times but you were in your own world so I just sat here watching you." He shrugged.

Have I been spacing out for that long?

I feel like I am a weirdo.

"But you know? that really was the most genuine smile that I have seen on your face since you came back." He stated honestly looking me deep in the eyes.

As much as I hate to admit that but Jason was right.

And what makes me more furious that he was the cause of my smile with the beautiful memory.

He affects me so hard..

We have so many memories together that I just can't wipe them away.

He has been with me through my whole life, since we were born we have been inseparable.

I ignored his last comment and asked him again. "Why are you here anyway?"

"I just thought that you might be nervous for tomorrow so I tried my shot of coming here to maybe find you here and luckily I found you." He shot me one of his dreamy smirks. "Also I will be with you tomorrow as well to be by your side."

This last sentence made my heart do that stupid thing and I found myself not able to shift away from his gaze.

He fucking affects me so much and that makes me furious as hell!!

"I know you are avoiding me hard and won't talk to me but I just can't leave you alone knowing how you feel about tomorrow." He took a deep breath facing the sea." I know after what I did I lost you for good and it affected me because I didn't just lose the girl I love but also my best friend. Even if I had Rick, Ben or Adrian but you were the closest to me you know me better than I know myself. So please push our differences aside for now and just act as we are in the past when we were being best friends and let me stay by your side just for tomorrow." He turned to face me again after the last sentence.

He was right.

He is affected by what happened between us as much as I am.

And I really know him better than himself and vice versa but I am trying to deny it.

And I certainly needed him right now.

I needed my best friend.

I rest my head on his lap as I used to do when we used to come here together.

He was surprised by the gesture, I could sense it but eventually, he snapped out of it relaxing and He starts stroking my hair softly as he used to do back then.

We stayed in silence for a while, a comfortable one.

It was relaxing..

It felt like old times.

Yes, I still hate him and don't trust him but this feeling that I get whenever I am with him..

At moments like those that made me see my old Jason in him before he betrayed me.

"I am nervous of tomorrow because many will try to harm us and now we are alone without Boss nor the gang to have our backs." I took a deep breath then continued. "I never lost a fight after being trained harshly and learned from my beginner losses but I feel like I will do tomorrow due to my nervousness and I am afraid that maybe that mask will fall and someone will recognize me from our old rivals... I just wish Boss was still here with the gang. life was so much easier and bearable back there."

There was a silence for a moment but Jason kept stroking my hair softly.

I guess he was deep in thoughts processing what I just said.

"I know how Boss death affected you three and I know that after what I did to you they were your life, they were the ones who gave you strength and the confidence that I took from you." He sighed ."But I also know that you are now stronger than ever thanks for Boss and you won't give up easily. You will do whatever you take to protect both Damon and Jane to make Boss proud up there. I also know that you don't trust me but just so you know I will be behind your back watching and protecting you along with my boys. I won't let any fucker hurt you or take you away from me ever again. I already fucked up once by force but I am not the old Jason and will do what I have to do to protect and keep you safe."

Unexpectedly Jason's words calmed me and made me believe that I won't fuck up things tomorrow.

I am sure as hell not trusting him yet but I feel like he genuinely meant every word so I will keep his word but still keep my guard up.

We were silent again but he didn't stop stroking my hair.

I didn't know what to say so I looked at him thinking that maybe the look will be enough to express what I feel right now and want to say.

And to my surprise, he was already looking at me.

I guess he never stopped watching me.

We held each other gazes for a while until out of nowhere he bent down pecking me on the lips.

"Sorry, I had too." He said scratching the back of his neck and I just nodded like the idiot I am shifting my gaze away from him with him still stroking my hair in silence.

It was fast and soft and definitely took me by surprise but surprisingly I didn't get mad at the gesture.

I don't know what's the matter with me today but maybe because I was nervous and needed him by my side like he always did?

I really don't know and I am tired from all that thinking.

I will just enjoy the comfortable silence with him, pretending that we are still young and nothing ever occurred between us.