Yesterday...

Mabel and Will were in the living room, playing with Gompers.

"Why does your brother think he looks creepy?" Mabel asked, squishing the goat's face. "He's so adorable!"

"I think it originates from the traumatic event he had as a kid, when an animal in a petting zoo stole his popsicle," Will chuckled, petting Gompers's head.

A moment later, there was an abrupt slam of the front door, then Bill walked in. And, his clothes had patches of dark grime.

"Hey, losers," He greeted.

"Bill, what happened to your clothes?" Will asked, concerned.

"It's nothing, some jerk almost run me over," Bill muttered. "And when he finally parked his car and went inside a store...I kinda slashed his tires."

"You what!?"

"Relax, I didn't get caught," Bill reassured. "I managed to frame it on an ill-minded old guy."

"So, you framed Fiddleford?" Mabel questioned.

"Yep. You have to bail him out, though."

"Bill, you should've told the truth," Will chastised.

"But, sometimes you have to bend the truth for the greater good," Bill countered.

Dipper walked in, previously in the kitchen. "Did someone ate my leftover lasagna? I left it in the fridge for later."

"It was Wendy," Bill said, quickly. "You know how feral that girl can be."

"This is a dark day," Dipper sighed. "Thanks, Bill." Then, he left.

"See? For the greater good," Bill grinned, then left the room.

Will huffed in frustration. "I wish Bill would stop lying."

Mabel looked at him thoughtfully, then her expression lit up. "I might be able to help with that."

"Really?"

She nodded. "You see, I happen to know the location of a certain item that can enchant it's wearer to tell the truth."

Will titled his head. "And, you're sure it's safe?"

"Absolutely," Mabel insisted. "And, it'll finally teach Bill a lesson."

Will thought for a while, then gave in. "OK, couldn't hurt to try."

Mabel smiled, then started explaining her plan.

❇❇❇

Later, Mabel and Will managed to retrieve the item, which was a thin golden necklace. They confronted Bill, whom was sitting at the kitchen table.

"Hey, Bill," Mabel smiled, gaining his attention. "Look what I got you." She held up the necklace.

Bill squinted. "This doesn't light up like the last one, does it?"

"No."

"Good, I don't need anymore fire hazards," Bill sniped, then peered at the jewelry curiously. "Hmm, this doesn't look too ugly. Thanks, I guess."

"No problem," Mabel said, giving him the necklace, and he put it on.

After that, Mabel scooted closer to Will, and whispered. "See if it works."

Will obliged, then asked Bill. "Hey, what really happened to Dipper's lasagna?"

Almost on command, Bill immediately answered. "I ate it, because I have little to no concern of people's possessions or emotions." He blinked. "That was weird..."

Mabel nudged Will excitingly. "It worked!" She beamed, softly.

"Yeah, but I still feel a little bad about this," Will admitted.

"C'mon, what's the worst that can happen?"

As she said that, Wendy and Dipper came into the kitchen.

"Hey, guys," Wendy said, immediately rummaging in the fridge.

"Red, I gotta tell you something," Bill said, suddenly. "I'm so sick of you stealing from our fridge, I put a trap in it."

"You what--" Wendy was cut off, when there was a loud blast from inside the fridge. She pulled her head out, and her entire face was covered in blue dye. "Well played. I'm gonna plunge myself in a random lake now."

After she left, Dipper gave Bill a stern look. "Bill, that was kinda scummy of you."

Bill didn't respond, looking at him blankly.

"Are you listening to me?" The Guardian snapped.

"You're really attractive, Pine Tree," Bill said.

Dipper blinked, turning red. "What? Are you making fun of me?"

"No, I'm being completely honest," The blond insisted.

Dipper gave him a calculated look, as though making sure he was genuine. Then, his expression turned shy. "Thanks, I suppose..."

Bill nodded. "Plus, that cute butt of yours ties the whole look together."

Will choked on air, Mabel was speechless, and Dipper looked like he'd been slapped in the face. "Excuse me?" He asked.

"That's only the gist of it, I didn't even begin to describe your--" Bill was cut off, when Will pulled him away from the table.

"Bill needs a nap," Will said, quickly.

"No, I don't," Bill told him.

"Yes, you do," His brother remarked, dragging him out of the kitchen, followed by Mabel.

Will released Bill, and he gave him a frustrated look. "You're acting weird, to be honest with you," He said, then walked away.

"This is not going well," Will pointed out.

"This was a good decision," Mabel insisted. "Bill is being more open than he ever was before, we just need time to get use to it."

❇❇❇

Throughout the whole day, Bill had been spouting the truth nonstop. To say that the experience was unnerving, was an understatement...

At 13:00, Bill was working his shift in the Mystery Shack, when a customer walked up to him.

"Excuse me, can I get this T-shirt in my size?" He asked, holding up the clothing.

"Forget the T-shirt!" Bill laughed, then yelled to the rest of the customers. "Hey people, look at this man's unattractive face!"

The man bowed his head, and Will led him away, murmuring. "I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry..."

At 14:00, Dipper and Bill were in the kitchen, and the Guardian was trying to work out a crossword puzzle.

"Bill, I need your opinion on something," Dipper said. "What's a six letter word for something that looks appealing?"

Bill thought for a moment, before picking up a pen, and writing the answer down on the crossword. Dipper looked at it, then frowned.

"Bill...you just wrote down my name."

Bill smirked. "Yep."

Dipper inhaled deeply, turned red, then set the entire crossword on fire. As soon as it turned to ashes, he stomped out of the kitchen without another word, on the same time Wendy walked in.

"What did you say to him?" She asked.

Bill shrugged.

At 16:00, the group was huddled together in front of the TV. Everyone was laughing, except for Bill.

"Is this what life is?" He questioned. "A horrific joke without a punchline? That we're all just biding our time until the sweet release of death?"

The TV show kept going, but no one was laughing. Everyone grew silent, while Will was rocking back and forth, murmuring to himself.

By the near end of the day, Will had enough, and went to go confront Mabel about it.

"We need to get that necklace back!" Will told her. "I thought I wanted a more truthful Bill, but I was wrong. So, so wrong!"

"It's not that bad," Mabel said, sounding like she was trying to convince herself. "It can't possibly get any worse."

"Bill Cipher, you are arrested."

Both stared, before heading in the direction where the voice came from. They arrived at the front door, where Officer Blubs and Deputy Durland stood before Bill.

"What's going on?" Will demanded.

"This boy called us over and admitted to committing property damage," Blubs explained. "Also, he called me fat."

"He's getting full jail time," Durland said, taking out a pair of handcuffs.

"Wait!" Mabel said. "Bill's innocent!"

Blubs looked at her with uncertainty. "Is this the truth you're telling?"

Mabel sweated nervously, then sighed. "Bill is...Bill is secretly a crime fiction writer."

"Huh?" Bill said.

"Yeah, he was telling you about a character in his upcoming page turner, a lovable delinquent," Mabel said, forcing a smile. "Also, have you lost weight, Mr Blubs?"

"Finally! Someone noticed," Blubs smiled.

Durland beamed. "An author! Can you teach me how to read?"

"Author?" Bill repeated. "I'm not--"

"Anyway!" Mabel interrupted. "Bill has a lot of writing to do. Bye, Officers!"

The two men bid them farewell, and left. After that, Will and Mabel sighed in relief.

"Aw, man," Bill said. "I didn't get to tell them about my obsessive jaywalking."

"Will, tackle him."

"What--"

Will tackled him to the ground, and tore of the necklace. "Got it!"

❇❇❇

"And that's the end of my tale," Mabel said.

"You never told me I said all those things to Pine Tree!" Bill stuttered, while the said brunette blushed nearby.

Mabel shrugged. "You never asked."

"So, what happened to the necklace?" Wendy asked.

"I put it somewhere no one would find it," Will said.

Bill looked around, then pointed to a taped box falling beside them. "It's in that box, isn't it?"

"Yeah..."

"So, if you told a story you just lived through," Dipper started. "How does it end?"

"I never made it that far," Mabel admitted, then a beam of light shined on them from below.

They stared down, only to see a beacon of light, which was likely the end to the pit. They screamed in fear, and but a moment later, they landed safely on the ground. They looked around, only to see that they were outside the shack, exactly where they last stood.

"Wait, what?" Mabel said, in disbelief.

"It's not a bottomless pit, it's a loophole!" Dipper realized.

"And it seems not much time has passed," Wendy pointed out.

"Well, this by itself makes a pretty good story," Bill smiled.

"Yep," Will agreed.

"And it all started, because we had to save Will for the twelfth time in the row," Bill said.

Will shoved him into the pit.

Bill screamed as he fell down, and the Guardians stared at Will.

"He'll be fine," Will said, before heading towards the shack.