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Hi Soulmates!!!

for sticking with me for so long!

So sorry I have been away these 3 weeks,

, much longer than usual

for your patience!

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October 26, 2019.

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The girl looks up, obviously catching his looming presence in her peripheral,

and slowly pulls off her headphones.

She gives him a cool, what-do-you-want look, which oddly reminds Namjoon of Yoongi.

"Look, I know this is weird, but...

Can I just... talk to you for a second?" Namjoon tilts his head,

forcing a tight-lipped smile onto his face.

The smile that he knows makes his dimples show.

The smile that softens people.

She simply taps her headphones gently,

without a word,

as though reminding him that she has removed them.

Namjoon is a bit taken back.

Her silence has thrown him off.

"Nice to meet you," Namjoon's manager comes to his rescue,

extending his hand in front of Namjoon.

He smiles at the girl, and she slowly shakes his hand.

"We're really sorry that you got hurt," he gestures to her knees.

"It's fine," she answers,

so quiet that Namjoon can't hear her over the hum of the jet engine,

but he reads the words from her lips.

"Hyung, can we arrange a ride for her?" Namjoon turns to his manager,

"A car to take her home from the airport? Since she's hurt..."

The older man nods.

"That's a good idea."

But the girl shakes her head.

"My company will have a car waiting for me at the airport."

And Namjoon wonders if he's disappointed because he didn't get to make it up to her...

Or if it's because he won't find out where she lives.

He catches that train of thought and strangles it immediately.

That's disgusting. That's what stalkers do.

What's wrong with you, Kim Namjoon?

If you want to know where she lives, you should ask her.

"Are you here for work, then?" Namjoon grabs at anything, to catch onto the conversation.

She nods.

And into the long silence that follows,

in which Namjoon's face is frozen stiff,

she gives him a brief glance of sympathy,

and adds,

"I am moving to Korea for work."

And then Namjoon knows that it is definitely,

definitely,

his turn to say something now.

But asking anything more would be weird.

Yet he couldn't just walk away.

His manager was staring at him in shock,

which is fair enough,

because Namjoon never trips so hard.

"Hey! Do you know BTS?"

comes a loud whisper from behind Namjoon.

It's clearly Jin's voice,

and Namjoon waves him away frantically, behind his back.

"World wide-"

" Do you like K-pop?" Namjoon shouts, cutting off Jin.

He can feel the heat on his neck crawling up to his ears.

And now the girl's eyes finally stop scanning him suspiciously,

now that he was no longer needling her for information about herself.

"Sure. I've listened to a few songs, but I don't really have time for music," she says.

Out of the corner of his eye, Namjoon sees Suga scoff and turn away.

"I've just been so busy with my career the last few years," she continues, "I barely have time for anything outside of work."

She looks down for a moment and sighs.

"I can understand that. I don't have much time for things outside of my work either," Namjoon replies honestly.

"Why do you ask?" she forms her question

even as she leans back

and slowly takes in his manager and the many black-clad staff around him.

She trails her gaze over Taehyung's handsome face,

which was peeking at them from behind his seat.

She looks back to Namjoon again,

staring at his earrings and the rings on his fingers.

The eureka! slides into place on her face.

"Do you work in K-pop?"

He grins.

"Yes."

"I see, are you a musician? Or manager? Coordinator?"

"I'm... a rapper. I also write music."

And now he's back on his turf.

Now he's got his easy smile back.

Now his confidence brings his nervous hands down to his sides.

"A rapper?" she raises her eyebrows slightly.

Namjoon laughs, finally, genuinely this time.

"What, do I not look like it?"

She shrugs, a faint smile on the corner of her lips.

Namjoon bends down, squatting so he is no longer towering above her.

"Hey, this is probably not what you had in mind,

when you come out today.

You know, getting hurt, and having a weird guy come talk to you...

But I..."

He struggles for the words, now that their eyes are level with each other's,

now that he is looking into her eyes,

and she's looking into his...

his letters

and his train of thought

all crumble away,

fading into a place that doesn't matter.

And then,

just like that,

between one blink and the next,

Her eyes are calm and steady as ever

but that's exactly what gives her away.

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Aura

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He looks too civilized to be a rapper.

His words are gentle, his voice deep but smooth.

His smile is... too cute.

But as he keeps talking, she thinks she can kind of see it.

He has a passion to him.

But he isn't a fire that blazes,

rather, he reminds her of embers that catch alight and drift in the wind,

deep red coals too steady to be put out.

He has something

burning within

that won't die.

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But neither of them say it.

She just looks at him quietly with her steady gaze,

and Namjoon thinks she's right,

that it might be better this way.

If they were not going to claim each other...

Why put it on the table?

Why rip open a world of hurt that neither of them could handle?

Well, if Jungkook's Bonding is anything to judge by, anyway.

Namjoon knows why he can't claim her.

He is...

Well.

He's RM.

But he is a little hurt that she is choosing not to claim him, either.

Is it because... he's not good looking enough?

But I'm charming, if you give me a chance...

he bites down on his tongue so he doesn't say it out loud.

His fingers close into a fist.

Guess it did help Jungkook to have good looks on his side.

The leader voice in his head shames him.

She would understand, then, why he isn't shaking her hand.

Namjoon pulls himself away from her carefully,

making sure they wouldn't brush against each other.

"Now that I'm being weird anyway, can I just... get even weirder and ask you for your email?" Namjoon tries for a laugh.

He holds his breath, because she has every right to say no.

Maybe she wants to walk away.

Maybe she doesn't want a Soulmate at all.

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She has always, always

wanted a Soulmate.

Someone who would understand her.

Someone who would be there.

Just BE there.

Someone to be hers.

Someone she could be with.

But...

A celebrity?

This is the exact opposite of the warm, cozy,

just-you-and-I intimate relationship that she wants.

The exact opposite.

He laughs,

and the deep timbre of his voice

jolts something in her chest,

and a trail of golden lights sparkle across her vision.

She holds back a gasp.

But it doesn't matter what she wants, anyway.

He doesn't want her.

Just look at him,

carefully folding his arm, holding himself back.

He is afraid they will touch, and accidentally bond.

Well.

That's just my luck, isn't it?

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Her eyes widen as she registers his question.

Her surprise surprises Namjoon.

Surely she can't be that shocked?

Of course he is hoping to keep her in his life somehow.

After all... they are Soulmates.

Why isn't she curious about him too?

Namjoon swallows his disappointment.

But in the next instant, his heart is lifted,

because she nods.

She reaches for her phone, unlocking it.

She opens up her email carefully, without jarring her tender fingers,

and hands her phone to Namjoon.

He understands immediately,

and takes the phone from her,

delicately,

their fingertips just inches away from each other,

and types in his own email address,

sending himself an email.

They watch the sent notification slide across her screen.

He is secretly pleased that she purchased in-flight wifi.

She is definitely his Soulmate.

"," Namjoon smiles.

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He is standing in front of the open door of the fridge

when the maknae stumbles into the kitchen.

"You found your soulmate?" Jungkook demands, by way of greeting.

"I found her a while ago," Namjoon says.

He pulls a bottle of water from the fridge.

It's been a month.

A long, long month.

Exactly 31 days, but he's not counting.

"Why didn't you tell me?" Jungkook grips the edge of the countertop.

"I'm sorry. I should have," Namjoon says.

He takes a long swig from the bottle.

"But you haven't bonded?" Jungkook's eyes are as wide as they were five minutes before debut.

Namjoon shakes his head.

"No... I couldn't, Jungkook.

It would mean weeks of me being out of commission from Bangtan while I healed.

It would mean me bringing her everywhere with us,

and on tour... hiding her somehow...

And we are... not exactly low profile.

I couldn't...

I just,

the timing..."

Namjoon catches himself before he slams the water bottle down on the counter.

His hand trembles slightly as he puts it down, slowly,

forcefully slowly.

"But if you don't bond... she could be with someone else."

Jungkook shakes his head.

He can't understand it.

If his soulmate didn't know she belonged to him...

If she didn't know they belonged together...

If she was with some other guy instead...

It would drive Jungkook crazy.

How could Namjoon hyung be okay with this?

"But if I'm her soulmate, that trumps anyone she's with... shouldn't it?"

Namjoon's ghosts flicker in his eyes.

How long can he make her wait?

And then could he even just show up and claim the bond when he was ready?

What if she got married, thinking he wouldn't want her?

What if she didn't want to bond anymore because she was deeply in love with someone else?

And she could be out there right now, with some other man...

His soulmate,

and he can picture her face now,

her deep eyes,

and her cherry lips,

with some other man.

"Hyung..."Jungkook whispers.

The sacrifices that Namjoon made for their dreams,

the responsibility he carried for himself and all of them.

It hurt Jungkook to see.

"You don't have to do that for us. We could make it work.

I'm bonded and we've made it work.

Why not for you too?"

And this hits too close to home for Namjoon.

and he it.

Namjoon's voice explodes from him.

He the water bottle across the counter.

It skids violently, thrashing water in every direction.

And then Namjoon is storming

past Jungkook,

who is standing there absolutely shell-shocked.

But Namjoon can't stop to apologize,

he can't stop.

He pushes past the maknae,

before he says something even worse,

his long legs going as fast as he can make them,

trying to get away from the dark voices in his head.

Namjoon goes,

half blind with tears,

gasping,

escaping,

running from this conversation,

and himself,

rushing

to pull the mask of RM

down over Kim Namjoon's face.

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Thank you so much for reading this.

I haveavailable too.

I worked hard on them, I promise they are good

forand

https://twitter.com/minxy_keys

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