—Noel Gallagher

After a few days, Julian and I fell back into our normal routine, sweeping the memory of our argument under the rug. I told myself that he just needed some time and he would eventually come around. Surely, it was unfair of me to expect Julian to do or say anything that made him uncomfortable, and given his past, doing so would only push him further away from me. I simply could not have that. So, a bit of compromise on my end came in the form of not needing a label. We could float along the way we were, as long as we were connected in some way.

Laina and I were spending less time together, since her new job was quite demanding. Regardless, she seemed to love it, and it paid her a lot more. Her coworkers were nicer, and she was even developing a small crush on one of them. From the way Laina described him, Wes sounded like a perfect fit for her, and I couldn't wait to meet him in due time. As long as he made my best friend happy, I would have loved and accepted him with open arms. She was worthy of every bit of happiness this world had to offer her, and it soothed me to think she was finally getting a taste of it.

My thoughts, energy, time, and emotions were so tied up in Julian and my job, that it sometimes felt like Laina was getting the leftovers of me. Knowing that Laina might have found somebody to adore her in the way that she deserved, quelled the quiet guilt within me.

October found me too soon, and towards the end of the month, Burt gave me a significant raise for all of my dedication and hard work at the paper. That day, Eric insisted on taking me out for drinks after our shifts. Politely and without explanation, I declined, but thanked him profusely for the offer. Instead, my celebration came in the form of pizza takeout, and a webcam video dinner date with Julian. To make the day even better, my passport had finally arrived in the mail, so we promised to spend Christmas and New Years together. I would fly to London for two weeks, which excited me endlessly.

My anticipation grew, not only due to the fact that I had never been outside of the United States before, but more importantly, because I'd finally be able to see where Julian lived. For the first time in months, I had something for which to look forward.

"Have you checked the rest of your post?" Julian asked through the screen.

Just hearing the background clinking noises—of his fork on a glass plate—had me feeling fuller. Warmer.

"Not yet. It's just in a pile on my table. Why?" I asked between cheesy nibbles.

My black olive sprinkled pizza wasn't anything fancy, especially when compared to Jules' homemade coconut curry chicken, but it still satisfied my taste buds in a blissful way.

"Maybe you should look through it," Julian offered, and slanted a thick eyebrow at me.

"Alright." I wiped my fingers and mouth with a napkin. "I'll be right back."

On my table was a pile of fliers for local supermarkets, plus plenty of junk mail, and a couple of manila envelopes that I had assumed contained unimportant purchases. But upon inspection, I found that one of them was decorated with an international mail sticker.

There was no name on the return label, only an address, but I recognized it as Julian's. When I ripped it open, I found a bubble-wrapped CD and a tiny note. In his small hand print, it read "Endlessly." Immediately, the aroma of his cologne greeted my nose and I surrendered to the heady, spicy scent.

I tore into the popping bubble wrap and found what I could have only assumed was Ascend the Stars' new album. The cover depicted a galaxy in shades of black, purple, and blue, with clusters of bright, white stars sprinkled throughout. The lower right corner of the CD read Chaos in the Cosmos in thick, white text. I ran back to my bed with the album, where my laptop, and Julian, were waiting for me.

"Your new CD?!" I dived onto the bed and smiled wide.

"Yep!" Julian grinned back proudly. "Have a listen, and tell me what you think."

"I will before I sleep tonight." I admiringly eyed the cover art.

"You should do it now, before it gets too late." Julian stretched, leaning back in his chair and ruffling his hair. "I'd love your opinion before the general population gets its paws on it."

"Okay, if you want me to. I will right now." I peeled the plastic wrapper off. "When is the official release date again?"

"November the ninth," he reminded me.

"I'm so proud of you, Jules." I beamed.

"I love you, Brooke." He squinted his beautiful brown eyes at me.

"I adore you." My heart pounded just at the sight of him. "I'll listen now. Goodnight, handsome."

"Goodnight, princess." We disconnected.

My headphones were snug over my ears, as I slipped the CD into the slot on the side of my laptop and hit play. Right away, I noticed a massive improvement from their debut album, which was already fantastic, but Julian's playing was impeccable. The riffs were melodic, catchy, and different, without being too eccentric. Devon's harmonized vocals had improved tenfold, but I more so felt my heart rate spike each time Julian sang backup, or aided in the occasional verse, or participated in a group shout. It was an amazingly upbeat album, aside from one song.

The final track was a softer ballad, with a beautiful, simple melody. It sounded somewhat familiar, as it began. I tried to place where I had heard it before. For the first time, I checked the back of the CD to learn the song titles. It was called "Endlessly," and as Julian's smooth, smoky voice filled my ears, realization made hot tears prick my eyes.

You're russet in the sunset

Reflection off the skies

Golden tones that offset

And widen in replies

My poem.

Amber after daybreak

Light creeping through the room

Bronzer now as we wake

One day in later June

Julian wrote his own chorus.

And I need you desperately

Lying here helplessly

You take the breath from me, sense from me

It's something heavenly, just call it destiny

Baby, you have to know

I love you, endlessly

Even after the twentieth listen, I was still a weeping mess. This was what Julian had meant, when he said I helped him write a song. Flashbacks of him practicing on my couch crossed behind my eyes, and the mind-boggling comprehension that he had done this for me made the breath catch in my throat.

How could I have ever doubted his feelings for me?

Soon, so many people would hear this song... these words that were both of ours, for each other. Maybe they wouldn't know it was ours, but that wasn't important. Julian and I would always know, and that was the only thing that mattered. It was a permanence in song, that swelled my heart with equal parts gratitude, love, and longing.

How can I ever thank you, Julian? You are my entire world. You've become my life. I love you. Endlessly. I texted him.

Just as I was about to doze off, he replied.

Just be mine every day of our lives. I'm already forever yours.

...

Two weeks later, Chaos in the Cosmos was out, and my flight was booked to London Heathrow International Airport. Burt had already approved my vacation time, and everything was starting to look up. The sun shined a little brighter on my way to work one morning as I listened to the radio, sipping hot green tea with extra sugar.

"This next one is from a band based out of the United Kingdom," the radio DJ announced. "They're called Ascend the Stars, and their latest album just hit the shelves. You're hearing it here first, only on 107.7 The Stone—Tucson's number one hit rock station!"

Unintentionally, I spit the remaining tea from my mouth onto the steering wheel, and struggled to focus on the road. My hands searched frantically for my cell phone on the passenger seat, and once found, I dialed Arrows. He picked up on the second ring.

"Good morning, my love," Julian's deep, silky voice chimed.

"You're on the radio!" I screamed.

"What?" His inflection relayed his confusion.

"You're being played on the radio in Tucson, right now! Listen!" I turned up the volume and sang along to the upbeat tune.

"Oh my God." Julian's voice was shaky. "You're, you're being serious? It's actually on the radio, stateside? Right now?"

"Right now!" I confirmed enthusiastically.

"Holy..." He muttered. "I've got to tell the lads! I can't believe this is happening!"

"Go call them! I love you so much! So much!" I squealed and laughed into the line.

"I love you, Brooke! I love you a million!" He hung up in a hurry.

That evening, on the way home from work, I heard them on the air again. Laina called me in a blissful stupor upon hearing them, too, and Julian had been texting me frantically throughout the day with updates. Apparently, several more radio stations across America had picked up on Ascend the Stars and were playing the single as well. Already, they were getting tons of new followers online, and their web store was timing out from all the visitors trying to access it at once.

This is absolutely insane. He wrote.

You deserve this, Jules. I replied. He truly did.

It's 3 a.m. I guess I should try to sleep for a bit, even though I'm still buzzing. Have some meetings tomorrow. What a day. I love you.

Please get some rest. I love you more. I sent it.

...

Over the next few weeks, radio stations in England, Ireland, Australia, and Canada began playing Ascend the Stars. It made little sense to me why America played them first, instead of their home nation, but I could not complain and neither could they.

Local news stations around London started calling the band's management company, and the guys began making appearances to promote the album. Orders were pouring in, people were demanding their cities be added to the now worldwide tour, set to kick off in a few months, and management was trying to convince the guys to extend their contract for another two years.

The band's management even arranged for a music video to be filmed, and within hours of it being posted online, the video began going viral.

While they were widely known and loved before, Ascend the Stars was being pushed into another stratosphere of fame—and it was happening so quickly that fathoming it became nearly impossible.

Before I knew it, Thanksgiving rolled around, and I had fully planned on spending my day off in my ugliest pair of pajamas, eating pasta on the couch. Those plans were interrupted by a knocking on my door. When I looked through the peephole to see who it was, I couldn't believe my eyes.

"Brookie!" My mom shrieked with open arms. Her dark hair was a bit longer, to the top of her shoulders, and she looked beautiful in a black cardigan, white tee, jeans, and tall, brown boots.

"Ma, what are you doing here?!" I hugged her back as tightly as I could.

"I'm here to spend the holiday with my daughter, what else?" She beamed.

"Well, come in." I opened the door wider so she could roll her little carry-on suitcase through. "Where's Adam?"

"He had to stay home and take care of the pups." My mom looked around, taking in the state of the apartment, and I silently congratulated myself for coincidentally cleaning the day before.

"How did you get here?" I wondered.

"I caught a cab. I wanted to surprise you," she replied. "The look on your face was completely worth it!"

"I could've picked you up," I mumbled.

"The place looks great, Brookie," Mom finally said. "They're paying you well, I see."

I didn't have the nerve to tell her that Julian had actually bought the items she was eyeing so carefully. Moreover, I didn't dare tell her the reason that he felt the need to buy them in the first place.

"How long are you here for?" I asked.

"Until Saturday." She smiled wide.

"Well, since I clearly wasn't expecting you, I'm not really prepared to make us dinner. It's too late to buy a turkey and get started on it now." I thought for a short moment. "I'll call around and see if I can get us a reservation somewhere." It was only noon, so we had plenty of time to decide.

"Okay, anything would be fine, Brookie." My mom lay out on the couch, and within moments, she was out like a light. I covered her with a blanket and went upstairs to make some calls.

Before she woke from her nap, I had secured us a reservation for seven-thirty at Alessandra and Sami's—a classy Greek restaurant just on the outskirts of Tucson. They were offering a four course Thanksgiving special that sounded absolutely delicious. We took our time getting dressed up for the evening, and even though I had taken three wrong turns while trying to find the place, we still made it to the restaurant with fifteen minutes to spare.

"Welcome and Happy Thanksgiving! Do you have a reservation?" The hostess, dressed in all black, asked as we entered.

"Yes, we do." I cleared my throat. "Fray, party of two."

"Ah, yes." She tapped her computer screen and grabbed two drink menus off the counter to her left. "Right this way, please."

As we sat down, my mom ordered a glass of white wine. It wasn't her fault, of course, but the aroma was mildly distracting to me while we waited for the soups and salads to be brought out.

"You know, Brookie," my mom said, before taking another sip. "I was really hoping that your new boyfriend would come along, so I could meet him."

"Oh," I said, taken aback by her choice of words. It was a reminder of what he didn't want to be called, and something in me fluttered with pain. "He's not in town."

"Oh, visiting family for the holiday?" my mom asked innocently.

"Not exactly. He lives pretty far away." I used my straw to stir the lemon slice and ice cubes in my glass of water.

"Where does he live then?" my mom asked, just as the appetizers were placed in front of us.

"Far," I said, before crunching into a big piece of lettuce.

"And what do you plan to do about that?" Mom interrogated.

"I don't know yet," I answered honestly. "He's been really busy and so have I."

"I just worry about you." Mom dipped a spoon into the aromatic potato soup. "You're all alone in that apartment, and I thought... well, I don't know what I thought. You don't tell me very much."

"I can take care of myself," I assured her.

"I know." She sighed. "I just worry. It's my job to worry. But I would love to meet him soon. So would Adam."

"Maybe," I said. I would've had to make sure that Julian felt comfortable meeting my parents. Family was a sensitive topic to him, for evident reasons, and I wouldn't put him in a position where he felt distressed and uncomfortable. "I'm going to visit him for Christmas."

"You are?" She tried, and failed, to conceal her surprise. "So, I won't get to have you home for the New Year?"

"Not this time." I felt the sting of letting her down.

"Well, where are you going?" she inquired.

"England." As I answered, she spit out her soup.

"England?" she repeated. "He lives overseas?"

"Yes, and it's not a problem to me," I said flatly.

"Well, it is to me." Irritation was clear in her voice. "How will you ever see each other? How serious are you about each other? Are you going to move there, or is he going to move here?"

"I told you, I don't know. We haven't figured that out yet." And I didn't need to be reminded of it.

She huffed, and started to say something, before she stopped herself. A couple minutes of silence passed between us, which we filled with tasting our main courses.

"Can I at least know this boy's name?" my mom begged. "This boy, who may be stealing my daughter away to another country?"

I thought very carefully about how to answer, if I even should have answered, and then felt a slight pang of guilt for my white lie.

"Just call him Riley," I said quietly.

"Okay, and you love this Riley?" she asked, although the answer was obvious.

"Very much," I replied.

"And he loves you?" she pressed.

"Yes."

"Then I already love him." My mom cut up her slices of turkey, while using her fork to hold it in place. "And Adam will, too."

"Thanks." I didn't know how else to respond.

We ate the rest of our meal mostly in silence, with just the occasional praising of how delicious the food was. I was stuffed midway through my entrée, but continued eating in order to keep my mouth full—and, therefore, make conversation difficult. Thankfully, Rose gave up on her cross-examination and I was able to enjoy the fact that my mom was there, in Tucson, for a few days with me.

Under the shield of the tablecloth, I was able to check my text messages while we waited for the bill.

Happy genocide of the indigenous people day, you merciless American! I love you. How are you spending your holiday? Can you believe it's raining in England for a change? So restless, I get to see you in a month's time. x

I'm at a Greek restaurant, muffin top pouring over my skirt from all of this food I just ingested. My mom showed up at my door today and surprised me. She's here for the weekend. I wrote back.

She is? Are you having a good time? Show me proof of this muffin top of doom.

I laughed, then tried to hide it with a cough before replying.

Yeah, except she was asking questions about you.

Like what? He asked.

Your name, where you live, saying she wanted to meet you. She thinks you're my boyfriend. I replied.

And what did you tell her?

I didn't tell her much. I wanted to write more to Julian, but the waiter was returning to our table with the receipt, so I hit the send button and slid my cell phone back into my white purse.

The food coma kicked in full force for both Rose and me when we arrived back at the apartment. She barely made it to the couch, lined with fluffy blankets and pillows, whereas I reluctantly made the treacherous trek upstairs to my waiting bed.

I had every intention to exchange texts with Julian for a while, but the moment my head hit the forgiving pillow, I lost the battle against my heavy eyelids.

Outside, it was starting to rain lightly. It had been weeks and weeks since the last storm, and with the water droplets tapping my window in a lulling rhythm, I was conked out almost instantaneously.

Rather than nightmares of thick smoke, screams, and suffocating heat, my dreams were instead filled with a golden-brown haired boy—whose soft lips contrasted his rough hands—and missed flights to Heathrow.

1. "Endlessly" by Ascend the Stars

2. "I Made It" (acoustic) by Kevin Rudolf

3. "Hall of Fame" (cover) by RUNAGROUND

4. "Reach for the Stars" found on Mega Blaster Recordings

5. "Good Life" (cover) by Anthem Lights

6. "Life is a Highway" by Rascal Flatts