"Never interrupt your enemy when he is making a mistake."

—Napoleon Bonaparte

I didn't realize I had fallen asleep, makeup and all, until a loud pounding jolted me awake in bed. My mind was scrambling to catch up to my now rapid breathing. I waited for the sound to repeat itself, and after a few moments, it did.

Someone was at my door.

I reached around for my phone, only to find it was past two o'clock in the morning. A knock past midnight was never a good thing.

My old apartment steps creaked as I quickly ran down them. Anxiously, I held my breath and looked through the peephole.

Through it, I saw the back of Caleb's head, as he slowly paced. His short, dark hair was disheveled and his nostrils flared as his chest rose and fell with deep breaths. Worry consumed me as I unlocked the deadbolt and opened the door slightly.

"Caleb?" I took in the sight of him. He wore a baggy, brown, long-sleeve shirt even though the weather for it was too warm. His dark blue jeans were loose and wrinkled.

"Brooke." His eyes traveled up and down my body. "What are you doing? Why are you all dressed up like that?"

"What are you talking about? I was asleep. What the hell are you doing here?" My frustration was growing as I sensed that nothing was really wrong. "What do you want?"

"I just really need to talk to you." Caleb took a step towards me.

"About what? Can't this wait?" My voice was careful, and low with sleepiness.

"No, it really can't. Please."

I rubbed my eyes and reluctantly decided to let Caleb inside. Mostly, I was worried about disturbing my neighbors any more than we already had. As I let the door open wider, Caleb sighed and stepped in, looking around as he did.

"Haven't been here in so long... When did you get that?" Caleb pointed to a bookcase in the corner.

"Why are you here, Caleb?" I didn't even bother trying to hide the annoyance in my tone.

"We need to talk about us, Brooke." Caleb took it upon himself to sit at the wobbly old table, in his old spot. The one chair I refused to ever sit in.

"There is no 'us,' so there's nothing to discuss," I said coldly, choosing to remain standing rather than sit down by him. "And I don't appreciate you coming here this late and scaring the hell out of me."

"Brooke, please. I'm sorry for everything. I know we can work through this, if we just give it another try. I know you still love me. You know I still love you."

With a literal shake of my head, I laughed once.

"You're delusional," I replied. "If what we had was love, then I want no part in it. And I'm done trying with you. I am so done."

"So, all these years mean nothing to you?" Caleb's dark eyes were wide with an emotion I couldn't decipher. "Nothing at all?"

"Sure, they mean something. They are a constant reminder of what I never want to relive." My arms folded under my chest as I looked to the side.

"Just one more chance." Caleb's jaw tensed as he sucked in a sharp breath.

"No, I'm done." I was emotionless. My voice carried absolute apathy and ice. "Done completely."

"I could be good to you," Caleb said flatly.

"Then whyweren't you before?" I snapped back, as my hands fell to my sides again. "I'm over the games, Caleb. You won't convince me again. I don't need you. I'm so much better off without you."

"Better off without me?" He scoffed. "You're a moping, jobless drunk without me."

I couldn't hold back the tirade.

"I'm jobless because of you. If you hadn't come and made a scene at Channel 4, I would never have had to quit. And not that it's any of your business, but I am getting a new job. Really soon. I have an interview with the Tucson Telegram this week, as a matter of fact. And I haven't had a sip of alcohol in quite some time, and I won't ever again. See, Caleb, unlike you, I'm trying to move forward with my life. You were a blip in the story of my life that should have never happened. I won't give you the power to hurt me anymore."

"Keep pretending, Brooke," Caleb mocked me. "I know who you really are. And whatever this is," Caleb motioned with his hands, up and down my body, "It's not you. Though, I guess I could sort of see someone eventually settling for you."

"You don't know me, Caleb." I stepped back, to lean against the wall. "You never did and you never will."

"So, what? You think he does? You fuck some no-name musician and you think you're hot shit now?" Caleb stood up from the table, but his hands still firmly gripped the ledge of it. "News flash, Brooke: you're not. You are the same scared little freshman that you were when I met you. Still desperate. Still pitiful. Still nothing."

"Then why do you want me?" My anger was trying to betray me as I blinked back the tears. I could not let them pour over in front of him.

"That's a good question," Caleb said, with one hand on his chin. "But I can promise you, I'm the only one that ever will."

"That's where you're wrong, and you'll never have me believe that again." I stared furiously at him, unmoving. "I don't need you and I don't want you."

Across his eyes,rage momentarily flickered. It was almost too quick for me to catch it.

"Did he give it to you better than I used to, baby?" Seemingly out of nowhere, a smirk began to play across Caleb's face.

As he mercilessly stared me down, I could feel my chest begin to heave harder with regret. It took just one night with Julian to realize what true intimacy really was. One night to fully realize that each moment with Caleb had been a terrible, awful mistake. One night to see how truly hollow, soulless, and cold Caleb's eyes were. What had I ever seen in them?

Why had I fallen for it all? How had I ever been so stupid?

"You were always the one with straight A's in school," Caleb continued, cutting through my thoughts. "So, you should be able to figure out that he's had lots of practice. Tell me how it feels to be another forgotten notch in his belt."

Around the room, my panicked eyes darted. From me, came nothing but silence.

"I hope you've been tested." Almost theatrically, Caleb sighed. He placed a hand upon his hip. "It's Sex Ed 101: Musicians are always dirty. And British musicians? Heh, well—"

"Fuck you, Caleb." I bit my tongue so hard that a metallic taste filled my mouth.

"Right here and now?" he smirked, standing a little taller. "I mean, if you insist—"

To calm myself, I took a deep breath before speaking.

"Get out of my apartment," I warned in a low tone.

Toward the door, I pointed. Caleb, however, acted as though he hadn't heard me at all.

"You were gone all night. He must've been quite convincing." Caleb inspected my body slowly, from head to toe. "How long did he have to talk to you, before your clothes were on the floor? Ten minutes? Maybe twenty?"

I was sure the strength of my heart's beats was enough to crack clean through my ribs.

"And what did you discuss?" Caleb sneered. "Let me guess... Did you two talk about your feelings?"

His jabs were unrelenting, and he made no effort to stop chuckling at my expense.

Mocking me. Always mocking me. I just wanted it to stop. And if it couldn't stop, I only wanted to escape.

"What could you possibly have in common with him?" Harshly, loudly, Caleb demanded. "Huh?"

He's trying to get inside your head, I told myself. Just like he always did before. Don't let him do it again, Brooke.

"You know absolutely nothing," I finally spat.

"Oh, you stupid little girl... I know enough. I bet he was so charming. Said all the right things." Caleb raised an eyebrow at me, in amusement. "But tell me, honestly—could he even kiss you with such a stiff upper lip?"

"You don't know anything," I repeated.

Throughout my veins, the blood began to boil. I didn't know how much longer I'd be able to keep my composure. The hairs on my arm stood on end and I clenched my fists at my sides.

"You need to reevaluate your life, Brooke." Caleb laughed. It was laughter stemming from rising fury. "I mean, is really what you're aiming for now? I've never known you to be so reckless before. You have to think about the future. If you get caught up with him, just imagine the dental bills."

"Are you done?" I refused to give him the reaction he wanted and instead remained coldly stoic.

When he realized I wasn't going to react, Caleb moved over to me with his chest rising rapidly. His reddened face was just inches away from my own.

"You really think he gives a shit about you?" Caleb hissed the words into my ear. "...You , don't you? You think he's going to save you?"

I kept my trembling hands out of his vision, and remained still as a statue.

"You're sadder than I thought. You disgust me." He snickered. "Nah, actually, I pity you. I've never met a chick with so much baggage before. And it won't take long for loverboy to see that, too... if he even sticks around for another piece."

Caleb's breath—with identifiable traces of beer—wafted toward my face.

"Add 'groupie' to your resume, before you send any more off." His words came out like a snarl. "You can tell them that, when the employers ask what you've been up to for the past six months. You filthy whore. Go run back to your little Austin Powers now."

I pushed Caleb's chest away from me, hoping to create some distance. Caleb grabbed my wrists and pinned them above my head. His grip was tight as he pinched the skin.

"Get your goddamn hands off of me," I warned him.

"I don't know where this newfound confidence is coming from... but you're still a fucking loser with daddy issues, and I'd annihilate you if you didn't already take care of that yourself," Caleb said, looking to the light scars on my skin. "Who really wants you, anyway?"

"Get out," I whispered.

Our eyes remained locked in a short-lived staring contest.

"OUT!" I frantically shouted. "GET OUT!"

"Fine." Caleb huffed.

He let my hands go and proceeded to stomp towards the front door. With his fingers on the handle, he turned back around, to look at me once more, before walking away.

"You'll be sorry," in an icy tone, he promised, before stepping back outside.

I locked and dead-bolted the door after Caleb slammed it shut, and watched him get into his car through the peephole. As soon as he sped off, I made my way to the kitchen.

Unthinkingly, I rummaged through the fridge and cabinets.

Nothing.

In an instant, I had an epiphany and bolted up the stairs, then into my closet. There, behind a pile of clothes in the corner, was a bottle of wine that I'd received a year earlier, for Christmas. I kneeled to grab it.

With a sick determination, I ripped off the foil wrapper and twisted the screw cap, tossing it across the carpet. My parched tongue begged for the liquid. I longed to taste the warm venom and escape my own mind.

The acidic, fruity aroma kissed my nose, only tempting me further. I sucked in a sharp breath, closed my eyes and wrapped my lips around the bottle opening. In just a few more seconds, the night would have been behind me. But something made me pause.

I gripped the bottle tightly... inhaling, and teeter tottering.

The sound of my phone vibrating delayed my decision, and I got to my feet, still carrying the bottle with me. Caleb must have wanted to continue this argument from his car.

I reached my bed and found my phone to see Arrows calling me. It wasn't until I said hello that I realized I had been crying. There was a gruff thickness to my voice that hadn't been there before.

"Brooke? I hope I didn't wake you." Julian's sweet voice sent a wave of calmness over me.

"No, you didn't." I started making my way downstairs, with the phone in one hand and the bottle of wine in the other.

"Are you okay? Why do you sound like you've been crying or something?" The concern in his tone was heavy.

"Probably because I have been." I walked over to the kitchen sink and started pouring the entire bottle down the drain before I could change my mind. I chased it down with water and waited until the drain circled clear.

"Tell me everything," Julian said.

1. "Trouble" by Halsey

2. "Earth" by Sleeping at Last

3. "Apologize" (cover) by Corey Gray