''I asked what's happening here.'' His voice echoed all around me, pushing me eagerly to find an answer to his demanding question.

Even though he's made his presence hard to ignore, I couldn't find it in me to look him in the eyes for more than one second. My face, I am sure looked like a mess, so even if I wanted to lie about what was happening, I wouldn't be able to.

Crazy how some people could damage other's lives like they are playing chess. We are just pawns in their game, we don't have a say in whatever it is they are planning to do with us next.

I took a deep breath and turned around to face his grandma, who desperately looked at me, shaking her head at whatever thoughts she thought I was having at that moment. She has the right to be scared, though, because all I was thinking about was to tell Noah everything. I hated the fact that I was constantly lying to him about everything when he has been nothing but honest to me. I feel like a traitor for some twisted reason, and I am not adapting well to such way of thinking. I hate it.

I could still feel the tears running down my face, numbing my eyes from the amount of pressure I was exerting to stop them, but my heart was still hurting, constricting in my chest tighter with every breath I was taking. I saw her mumbling a plea, but what could I do right now? Do I lie again? Is that what she wants?

She has been keeping a vital secret from him all his life, and hasn't dared to reveal it. It makes me almost curious about how he would react. Would he hate me for keeping this shattering secret? Or would he be heartbroken? I don't know anymore, but what I know is that I am done keeping secrets. He has a right, and I wouldn't ever like to be yet another person who had to keep this away from him.

''N-Noah...T-there is something you should know--'' I stumbled on my words before granny interrupted me hastily.

''No! There is absolutely nothing you should know! Emma, you are nervous, look? I get it, but please, please...'' I turned around quickly, taking her hands in mine, trying to reassure her, seeing her on the verge of tears wasn't settling in right with me.

I stroked her hands soothingly, ''I love you, I really do, but you can't keep doing that anymore. He has a right to know, this is something you shouldn't keep to yourself, okay? Please understand.'' My voice cracked in whispers that I wasn't sure she heard.

Her eyes got glassier by the second, but I had to stand my ground. ''He'll hate me.'' She said, a tear traveling down her aging skin, that looked like it has endured a lot.

Stroking her hands more forcefully, I muttered, ''And he will hate me too, but we both have to understand that he will loathe us if he found out from someone else.''

She closed her eyes for brief seconds that felt like a lifetime, but I waited for her to give in non the less, ''L-Let me be the one that tells him.'' She finally said, and I felt my heart tug its final tug.

I knew after this moment nothing between me and Noah will be the same. But if that meant that he could finally know his truth and decide what to do with it, I'd do anything. Just for that.

xxx

.

We have not been talking, and I would be lying if I said my heart wasn't hurting like never before.

I am giving him time as much as I can because I know how bad it is to suddenly see that everything you've been living is a lie. I have lived that before, but not as cruel as Noah is probably living it right now.

More than a hundred times I have stopped myself from going to him and hold him while he complained about everything and anything, but since the first and last time I had went, I decided I am not going to try again.

It was the same day when he had taken off to Levi's. I went after him to see him, but he didn't want to see me. I couldn't be selfish when I knew how much he was hurting, so I swallowed my feelings and gave Levi a sympathetic smile and walked my way back home accompanied by him.

Everyone has been asking where Noah is, and as much as dad tries to hide it, but he has grown fond of Noah. Lucas has been gruff about it, but I also knew he missed having Noah around as well.

The girls tried talking it out of me, sensing there was something wrong with my attitude, but I have been telling them there is nothing going on. Not that they believed me, but at least they have stopped asking about it.

School has been boring without him always by my side, making sure Asher was a 10 arms distance away, and bringing me brownies, claiming granny has baked them when really it was him.

So yeah, I miss him so much, and there is nothing I could do about it.

The bell rang, cutting off my train of thoughts as I walked through the sea of people. Finals are next week, so I expect Noah to be there or else this whole year has lead to nothing for him. He has been working hard, and even though he has tried not to show how stressed out he was about his college applications, I know he was.

And if he is that stubborn to not come here and take the finals, I might as well drag him here myself.

''Hey bestie,'' Abby said, coming from behind me. I shrieked a little in surprise but smiled a little non the less. ''what do you have?''

I tapped my finger lightly on the edge of my nose, trying to remember what I have next. Math AP, it was. Without Noah, again.

Sighing, I arrived to class, not so excited. Students were already filling the room, probably all already scared of the exam and working on their final ounce of brain cell. Sure it was a hard class, but Noah made it easier for me without even knowing. Oh God, I really need to stop thinking about him. He clearly doesn't wanna talk to me, and he is right, but how could I've acted differently?

Huffing, I plopped down in my regular seat and brought my notebook out. I have been writing him a letter ever since he refused to talk to me, thinking he might want to know whatever happened, so I've been writing and writing.

In the midst of my thoughts and the scribbling of my pencil, a striking smell penetrated its way through my head and I lost focus, my heart rate rising and I looked up so quickly my neck hurt.

He was here. He was actually here. Standing right in front of me, staring right through my eyes. However, I couldn't over look the glint in his eyes. It was different from his regular shimmer, it almost looked dead and my heart did a painful tug I think I visibly winced.

''Pack your things.'' Was the first thing that came out of his mouth. I hesitated for moments, my eyes roaming the length of him, skimming for any wring detail. But aside from his grown facial hair, I found nothing different.

After what seemed like forever, I actually started packing my things while my pulse kept running, numbing me a little. After I was done, he snatched the back-bag out of my hand and waited for me to move along since I was a little slow at the moment.

On cue, the teacher entered the class, I tried to shoot a sympathetic smile, but Noah was already tugging me away without acknowledging the teacher that stood watching us with annoyance.

The hallways were quiet now, except for the few students who couldn't care less about classes. But again, can't really judge when I am skipping one myself.

Noah kept his hand around my wrist all the way to his car. My wrist, not my hand. My heart hurt, but I lost count already of the tugs, I thought I might end up having a heart attack.

He opened the passenger door for me before throwing my bag in the back seat and rounding the car to get to his seat. My eyes trailed after his every move, trying to imagine what was he about to say after nearly two weeks of not talking. I was nervous as hell, and it didn't help the fact that I wanted to grab him and kiss him an apology. A sincere one at that.

The silence was eating me away as I contemplated whether I should be the one breaking it or not. Sighing in defeat, I started my ramble, "I am so, so, so sorry, Noah. I swear to God I wanted to tell you the moment I knew, but you have to understand how hard it was for me as well. I love you so much and I couldn't bare to think about you breaking apart. But it was always my intention to tell you, and Granny as well, I swear, she loves you so much and wouldn't ever want to be the reason who brought you agony. You don't have to see me anymore if you want, sure will hurt on my side, but it's fine as long as it is what you want.

I know it's hard what you are going through, but I am here. We can do anything as long as we are together. That is of course if you decided you wanted to keep seeing me. I am not pressuring you into anything. Oh, and look..." I trailed off, jumping a little to the back to fetch my backpack to get the letter that I wasn't done writing,

"Look, I have been writing you a letter about how I knew about it so you believe me, and also about some stuff about me that you wanted to know but I never was brave enough to tell you. I was scared that you would leave me for it, but now that it has got to nothing, you have every right to know about what I tried so hard to hide from you. Please don't hate, I don't think I'll be able to live with that. I love you so much, it hurts—"

At this point I knew my emotions have got the best of me since I felt witness on my cheeks. However, it didn't take me long to bathe in the feeling of heartbreak because Noah was fast enough throwing his upper body over to my side, the same time throwing my seat over 180 degrees. I shrieked in surprise when his plump lips landed on mine in urgency, as if he has been thirsty for these past two weeks, and I was his water.

He fisted my hair in his hand while the other cradled my face like I was a china piece, so vulnerable to breaking apart in his hold. His tongue darted its way through my mouth, exploring every inch of it as if it was his first time. I moaned when he bit my lower lip and sucked on it deliciously, sending it straight to his man-hood that was digging my thighs.

He groaned at that.

I felt wetness between my thighs as his hands came around my waist, squeezing me as his kiss became more furious, hungry, and affectionate.

We stayed in that position for what felt like hours before we broke apart, both our lips swollen as hell and chests rising heavily. Heaven.

"Hi..." I muttered, stupidly as his eyes took in every inch of my face, landing on my lips and he muttered a small "fuck".

He buried his head in the crook of my neck and my body shuddered at his huge intake of breath. God, how was I living before him?

And for some stupid reasons, my head took me to doomed places where my trauma played a big role in them. Did he see someone else when he was away? Did some girl made a move on him and he went with it?

I know it's kind of selfish and dumb, but take that from a girl who was betrayed badly, and stabbed for reacting.

I didn't voice my words out loud. Not now, at least.

"I missed you. So fucking bad." He huskily whispered in my neck. A grin made its way on my lips. Great, now he has turned me into a maniac.

"I didn't." That made him look up. "Cause you were always there, buddy." I pointed at my heart. And he has made me corny. Who am I becoming?

He grinned back, kissing the tip of my nose, "Not gonna let you win the next round, babe."

I swooned.

R.I.P Emma who died from butterflies attack.

"Is there going to be a next round?" I know I was being paranoid and embarrassing, but I had to make sure. Like real bad.

A scowl formed in his face, "till my last fucking breath. What did I say? Didn't I say that I will never let you go?"

I gazed at him through my lashes, "through thick and thin?" I was joking. Okay, maybe I am still a little paranoid.

"I will never leave. Not even when you are crying while watching the Fault In Our Stars and drenching my shirt with your runny nose. And not when you get moody because you favorite ice cream parlor closed, and not when Lucas is giving me shit, and not when I have to eat the worst chicken there ever was. And absolutely not when you are looking at me like that, and when my heart feels like it's beating its way through my chest to come to you. I love you."

I blinked once. Twice. Thrice. And then loads more.

I smiled really hard my mouth hurt a little. He pecked my lips, a smug look taking place on his face, because he just knows his words are powerful to knock off mine.

I pecked his lips this time as he served with one of his smirks.

"How are you? Honestly, Noah, I'll know."

He sighed tiredly, but his eyes didn't tell me he was mad at me for asking, so I stood my ground. I needed to know how was he coping these past days. I need to be there with him.

"I talked with my parents." My heart warmed. He still calls them his parents. That's because they are. No matter what happens, these are his real parents that love him more than anything in this world.

"They were understanding and caught me up on my biological ones. Not a fun story but my story non the less." He smiled. "I look a lot like my mother, did you know that?"

"Yeah." I muttered, "I have seen her picture."

The part I was dreading the most, I knew was coming my way now.

"My biological father on the other hand, an asshole. And a gang leader they said. The one who has been probably posing these threats our way." He took hold of the crane on my neck, crushing me to him that our breaths mingled together. "Threats that mean nothing, and I would never, ever let them harm you in any way. You know that, right?"

His voice reflected sincerity and something else, maybe fear that I might not believe him. He was desperate for me to have faith in him. But I already do. No questions asked, in a heart beat.

"As long as you are with me, I don't get scared, Noah."

He smiled this time, "when did you get this cheesy? You write letters now, you tell me?"

The question pushed the grin off of my face. I wrote everything about Ethan, Lea, and the scar in this letter. How will he react, is the question that twists my mind painfully. Scratch a heart attack, I am having a stroke now.

I coughed nervously, "you should probably read this letter before taking any decisions involving me—"

He cut me off once again with his lips. I am loving this technique, too much. It's not healthy.

"I don't want to read this letter now, Emma. I just want to be with you. Besides, I know whatever it is, it's not as terrible as you make it seem. I'll still hold my vows. And you."