It was the day they both dreaded.

Nate was getting sent out to basic training before getting shipped out to Saigon, Vietnam.

Jessica was holding on tight to Nate as they navigated the train station where hundreds of Marine wines and children tearfully saying bye to their father, brother, husband etc. The whole scene was making Jessica sicker than she was that morning.

Nate checked in with a couple of people before facing her. Nate usually looked so confident and cheerful, but now he looked, nervous? Scared? She couldn't tell. She reached up to touch his face and brought it closer to hers, foreheads touching. They earned a couple of strange looks from people, but at that point, they couldn't be bothered to care. "What's running through your mind?" She asked.

Nate looked up and looked around at his surroundings. "Goddamn it," he mutters. "You were right, I️ am making a mistake here," he nervously confesses to her. "I'm scared."

"Honey, you're gonna do great-"

"No! Not for me, I️ don't care about me. I️ meant for you," he exclaims, holding on to her hands now for comfort. "I'm leaving you alone. How could I️ do that?" He shakes his head.

Jessica nervously bites her lip. "You're not...leaving me alone," she says, the tone in her voice catching him off guard.

"What? Well I️ mean, of course not. You'll be with your mother-"

"No I️ mean-"

"All new recruits, all aboard in five minutes!"

"I️ gotta go," He tells her, slipping his hand out of her grasp. He presses a kiss on her lips so hard, she thought she'd might break herself.

But once he pulled away, she shakes her head into focus. "No Nate, wait!" She grabs his wrist.

"Two minutes!"

"Jess, I️ have to go!" He says urgently, watching everyone board the train now. If he didn't leave now, he'd be in violation of his sentence, and he'd me going away to jail for way longer than fifteen years.

"Nate, I️-I️'m pregnant!" She blurts out, making him stop and look back. "I'm pregnant," she cries.

"One minute!"

Nate looks between the train and her, thinking about what he should do. He then rushed over to her and kisses her again, longer than before this time. "I'll come back to you. I️ promise," he whispers, her hand closing around the one on her face. "Both of you."

"Thirty seconds!"

"I️ love you," she says.

"I️ love you too."

The train horn sounds off as the last of the passengers hop on board. Jess tearfully watches the train pull away as a couple of women around her look at her in sympathy.

* * * *

Dear Nathan,

I️ know. I️ should've told you earlier. But I️ wasn't sure yet. My mother actually thinks I've been pregnant for a month now, before the trial. But after our honeymoon, I️ was pretty sure.

But I️ also didn't want to burden you about taking care of our baby, you already have so much going on. But I️ also couldn't live with myself if you....didn't know about him/her before you left.

But don't worry about us honey. I'm with my mom, and Kim and Andy promised to be great godparents to our child, like I️ know you'd like.

Love you,

Jessica

* * * *

Dear Nathan,

I️ bet shooting guns is a whole lot more fun then carrying a child. I️ hate you for doing this to me. I'm five months along and I️ can already tell this child's gonna have your big head.

Surprisingly, your sister's been coming to see me in secret, since your parents still haven't accepted me yet. You'll be happy to know Fiona's excited to be an aunt as well. I'm so glad I️ have her support.

How are you? I️ miss you so, so much and wish that you were here to spoil me like I️ know you would. But honestly, every day I️ miss you. I️ wish things were different for us. I️ wish this never happened.

But we can't change the past and we can't control life. Only how we react to them.

Love you,

Jessica

* * * *

Dear Nathan,

I still remember our wedding night. I️ still feel your kisses. How good your touch feels. Your voice in my ear. I️ miss it. I️ miss all of it. The fun times we had. The night on the roof. Sometimes I️ doubt you were even real at all. And then I️ look down at my huge belly and remember that you were here, and here's my proof, this little one growing inside of me. I'll always be with you.

Love you always,

Jessica

* * * *

Dear Nathan,

It's a girl.

* * * *

"Jessica, you can't alway be fearing the worst. That's not good for you or for her," her mother scolded as they walked down the street with her baby in hand.

Jessica frowned as she pulled her child closer to her. Elisa Carter was the perfect mix of her mom and her dad, having her mother's natural curls and her father's blue eyes. Prettiest baby ever if she does say so herself. She was almost a year old, which is almost how long it's been since Nate wrote her a letter.

Of course, she's written dozens more, even if he didn't reply back, but she figured he was busy doing Marine stuff. She's heard A couple of good things from him, like him graduating with honors from basic training, rising through the ranks much faster than usual (these were tough times) and him earning an intel job despite his record and him sending them money back so she and Elisa were taken care of. But eventually, they moved him from intel to actual combat, and after that letter, she hadn't heard from him since.

Her mother insists it was cause he was busy. Maybe even the US military aren't allowing them to send mail for national security reasons. But she wasn't sure.

They were walking back from the farmers market when she noticed two men in uniform knocking at their door when they clearly weren't home. She passed her baby off to her grandmother and walked closer. "Hello?" She said, making them both turn around. They both wore formal military uniforms and she was wondering what was going on.

"Are you Jessica Carter?" One of them asked.

"Yes..." she answers warily. "Why?"

They both looked at each other before continuing to speak. "I'm Chaplain Captain Massey and this is Gunnery Sergeant Nichols," he introduced. "We're from the United States Marine Corps. It's about your husband, Corporal Nathan Cater," He said.

Panic suddenly struck. "What about him?" She tried to stay calm, but was failing miserably. "Did something happen?"

"That's the thing Mrs. Carter. We're not sure," the chaplain winced. "Your husband's unit was attacked during a supply run by the North Vietnamese and now they're...MIA," he informed her.

"MIA? What?" She started to freak out.

"Missing in action. Basically, we don't know where he is," the sergeant said from beside him.

"You don't know..." she repeated, sounding shocked and confused. "Is he dead?" She wanted to know.

"We're not sure," the sergeant said from beside the chaplain. "But we've been searching for a couple of months now-"

"He's been missing for months?!" She screeched. "You're telling me my husband's possibly been dead this whole time and you're telling me ten months late?!" She yelled.

"Mrs. Carter, there's also a good chances he's a prisoner of war!" The chaplain stepped in. "And if we can find him, we can bring him home!"

But Jessica barely heard the last part as a panic attack started settling in.

All she could heard was her heart pounding heavily in her head and her breathing getting shallow while her vision got all fuzzy. And before she knew it-

She blacked out.

____________________________

That's it. That's the tweet.

Jk. 1980's coming right up! You guys are gonna like this one too 😌

Y'all don't know how weird it was typing in "light-skin baby with blue eyes". I️ hate the fetishization of light skins cause I'm a light skinned girl myself and I'm sure half of people interest in me I️ cause I'm "exotic" looking-

And then idk if y'all saw that dumbass video of that YouTuber couple having their baby and then that girl saying "I️ thought you were gonna have pretty eyes". Like PLEASE REMOVE THIs CHILD OUT OF THEIR HOMe.

BUT. But. That's a different convo, we not getting into.

Thanks for reading my story! Please vote and comment and maybe even tell your friends about it! 😚💞