efore he could stop it, tears started to drip from his eyelashes.

Zushi startled forward, his hands going to Killua's cheeks. "Oh, fuck, dude—It's okay, I'm right here—"

"Y-You're gonna disappear," Killua stammered, lips quivering.

"What happened? Why's he crying?" Gon demanded, pushing up beside Zushi as Killua rubbed his eyes dry on his sweater. Gon put his hand on Killua's back.

"I'm gonna disappear?" Zushi whispered, eyes wide and dilated.

Killua nodded as he put his head to Zushi's shoulder. Zushi put his arm around Killua's back as Killua said, "If you leave me, you'll be gone. Thin air—poof."

"Shit, no way," Zushi breathed against Killua's hair. "Dude, don't let me go."

Killua sniffled and rubbed a hand over his eyes. He felt Gon's hand gently nudging him forward, and eventually, he realized that they were moving through the crowd and out of the middle of the mosh pit where he and Zushi had been slow dancing to Nicki Minaj.

Gon walked them down the black lit hallway. Killua felt the spacetime continuum warping around them and spinning the world into a web around them. It clung to his skin and reminded him that he needed to hold onto Zushi or risk losing him forever to the black hole void of the party. Somehow, they arrived at the first floor after a treacherous journey up the stairs in which Zushi had to physically prompt Killua to even take a step. The third dimension felt so unreal and unfathomable that to transfer his weight up a Y-axis was just too much for his mind to comprehend. Eventually he closed his eyes and let Gon and Zushi take the wheel.

When they at last collapsed onto the living room couch, Killua pulled his knees up to his chest and huddled into Zushi. Over his head, Zushi said to Gon, "Dude, you don't have to stick around us. I can take care of Killua."

"I don't mind," Gon said. "How are you feeling?"

"Sleepy but okay."

Zushi pressed his cheek to Killua's hair and glanced over at Gon. Gon had his arm around the back cushion, looking at Zushi expectantly, like he was anticipating something. Zushi was, by no means, going to relinquish Killua into the hands of his fuck boy of a roommate. Besides, Zushi was exhausted. The dancing coupled with the smash effect of the edibles made him feel as though he had partied for a dozen hours before just now sitting down.

Zushi looked down and found Killua's eyes closed. He glanced over at Gon again, nibbling on his bottom lip. Gon drew his eyes up from where he had been watching Killua. Zushi narrowed his eyes at Gon.

"What?" Gon said.

"Stop looking at him," Zushi said, defensively. It made him feel queazy thinking about the way Killua looked when he admitted that he and Gon would never be a "thing". Truthfully, it broke his heart to realize that Killua had spent all semester pining over his idiot of a roommate, only for it to end before it ever could begin because of Gon's superficial dating life.

Gon rolled his eyes away and said, "Fine, I won't look at him if you tell me why." With that, his eyes landed on Zushi again.

It was Zushi's turn to roll his eyes. "'Cause I don't want you to hurt him. I know your tendencies and I know Killua's a longterm type of guy. I don't know what happened between you guys but I know you really pissed Killua off."

"What makes you think I pissed him off?"

Zushi looked down from where Gon's eyes never wavered on his. He swallowed hard and shook his head. "When he's upset he doesn't like to show it. He said he was fine but I just... don't believe him, I guess?" He yawned then, slumping back in the cushions with Killua at his shoulder. "You going on dates with other people when you've got a perfectly good specimen right here is fucked up, dude. I'm sorry, but it is."

He hesitated to look up at Gon. When he did, though, he found Gon's eyes had settled at his lap. The hand he had over the back cushion rubbed idly at the seam, and Zushi could feel the guilt in all this and more. Gon lifted his eyes to meet Zushi's as he said, "I know I fucked up."

Zushi nodded. He didn't know what to say to that. He almost wished Gon had been more of an insincere fuck boy who Zushi could despise without consequence. He wanted Gon to say, "Yeah, yeah, I know, I know," like Zushi was his mom nagging him about cleaning the dishes just so he could call Gon out for being an asshole to his best friend.

Instead, Gon held up his phone and swiped through the screens for Zushi to see. "I deleted Tinder. I'm working on it," he promised.

Zushi nodded again. "Good. I'll... hold you accountable."

Gon laughed softly, lowering his phone. "Okay. I'm depending on you, then," he said.

***

Gon walked Zushi and Killua to Hatsu Hall around midnight. The street lamps were on and the sky was dark aside from the city lights collecting on dust particles in the air. Killua felt exhausted—the type of exhausted that put bags under his eyes from sheer stress. He swiped into the hall and, with the door propped open, he turned back to Gon and Zushi.

"Sorry about being such a mess," he said. His head still felt like cotton, but it was more sleepy than anything. He wouldn't be surprised if he knocked out the rest of the night and slept through his alarms. He rubbed the back of his head with a small, apologetic smile as he added, "I don't usually get paranoid when I'm high. So sorry about that."

"It's fine," Zushi said, smiling. "It was kinda cute."

"Sh-Shut up," Killua stammered, cheeks flushed pink.

Zushi beamed at him. Killua glanced at Gon, who stuck his hands in the pockets of his pants. He still felt the strong, magnetic urge to cling to Gon and not let go. Instead of doing that, though, he raised a hand and said, "Congrats on the win. Are you two heading back to the party?"

"I'm exhausted, so I'll be going back to Ren," Zushi said.

"The guys are still at Kappa, so I'll be over there," Gon said.

With that, they went their separate ways. Killua slumped to the Hatsu tower elevator and as he waited for it to drop, he checked his phone. There was a message from Gon asking that Killua let him into the building. Killua rolled his eyes and slumped back to the main door. The student worker at the front desk watched him all the way as he let Gon through the locked door.

"Did you hide in a bush or something until Zushi left?" Killua said.

Gon put his arm around Killua's back as they walked to the elevator together. "Maybe," he hummed in Killua's ear.

When they stood in the elevator together, Killua let himself, for a moment, hug his arms around Gon's neck and hold on tightly. He could feel Gon breathing against him—the rise and fall of his chest, his breath against Killua's hair. Killua tucked his face in close, hiding his eyes against the fabric of his oversized sweater. Gon's sweatshirt smelled like this—like the cologne Gon had dabbed onto his neck and the fabric softener on his clothes.

Killua's throat became tight with emotion. He tried to swallow it down but couldn't. When the elevator door slid open, Gon moved as if to pull away, but Killua couldn't budge. Gon put his hand out to stop the elevator door, his other arm holding Killua securely to his chest.

"Don't let me go," Killua whispered. Any louder and he feared his voice would crack.

"Do you want me to carry you?" he asked. After a moment spent considering it, Killua nodded his head. Gon ducked down and hooked his free hand under Killua's knees. He tipped Killua back and into his arms just in time to sneak out of the elevator before the doors could close on them.

At Killua's door, Gon set his feet on the ground once more. Killua felt like a kid again—and not in the best way possible, since the floor was lava and Gon was immune to it. He couldn't control the way his feet danced impatiently like the carpet was burning the soles of his feet. Thankfully, Gon was quick to unlock the door and drag Killua inside. He locked the door behind them as Killua lunged for the bed and nestled in.

"No lights," Killua said when Gon reached for the switch.

Gon tossed the keys onto the end table and crawled up alongside Killua. He kicked his shoes off before reaching down and unlacing Killua's sneakers. Killua pushed himself up so that when Gon finished, he could hug his arms around Gon.

"So you've done this before?" Gon asked, a hint of amusement tugging at his lips.

Killua nodded, letting out a shaky breath. His throat still felt tight. "I used to party a lot with my brother. Just smaller house parties. Local bands, live music, that sort of thing," he said. He slipped his knees up, hooking his legs over Gon's lap. Gon leant back against the headboard and rubbed his hand idly up and down Killua's back. Killua closed his eyes and whispered, "I missed you."

"We saw each other yesterday," Gon said, which only brought to mind what Killua had done in the hammock.

Killua groaned and held on tighter, clasping his hand on his arm so his nails dug in through the knitted sweater sleeve. "You were so fucking hot," he breathed, eyes closed against Gon's neck. He brought his fingers up to the hickey on the opposite side of Gon's neck, just below the juncture of his jawline.

Gon shivered underneath him and said, "Don't tempt me. I can't believe you fucking did that with Uvo and Knuckle right there."

Killua smiled sleepily and hummed, "It's why I did that."

"You get off to public sex?"

Killua giggled a little. Gon cursed and rolled his eyes. The sound of Gon's laughter, though, lightened his chest. However, the subject that had been in the back of his mind all that night reared its ugly head once more. He bit his wavering lip, the bubbly sensation cutting off abruptly.

Gon seemed to notice it. "Hey, what's wrong?"

Killua pulled his head back a little. He rubbed his cheek against his shoulder and said, "I'm worried about asking Zushi to let me stay in SoCal with him."

"When's he going to SoCal?" Gon said. It took too long for Killua's brain to catch up with the question, but Gon gathered the information himself. "Oh, Winter Break. You aren't going home?"

Killua shook his head. "I can't go home. It's better for Alluka if I'm not there. She's able to handle herself better when I'm not collateral."

"Your sister?" Gon said, and Killua nodded. "Shit, I'm sorry. So you're gonna ask Zushi if you can stay with him?" Killua nodded again. "Well, why don't you just stay with me?"

Killua stared at him. It was dark in the dorm, but the streetlights provided ample glow to capture Gon's attentive look, studying Killua and his reaction. Killua never even considered that Gon's family lived anywhere in the area. YU recruited from all over the country and for good reason, and Killua wouldn't have been surprised if Gon came all the way from the East Coast.

"Wh-Where?" Killua stammered.

"I have to stay on campus for Bowl Week. I'll be gone after the twenty-sixth, but before that I'll mostly be with the guys. Some of us are staying at Sigma Alpha, and Knuckle's giving me his room since his family doesn't live all that far away," he explained.

Living at Sigma Alpha all Break... with a dozen football players, Killua mused, dizzying at the thought.

"You can think about it," Gon said when Killua remained quiet, the shock still rippling through his system. "It'll be crazy there for sure, but just know that I have no problem sharing a bed with you over break. And the guys won't care since you're pretty low-key, and I'm guessing you'd be working over break anyway."

"Y-Yeah," Killua stammered, bewildered that Gon had put that all together. It sounded like a solid plan—to have Killua stay at Sigma Alpha. He nodded again and said, "Yeah, that sounds good. If... you're sure you don't mind."

Gon shook his head, smiling. "Not at all. It'll be fun. We already have movie nights lined up through the holidays when we're in North Cali."

That does sound nice, Killua thought. He settled in against Gon's chest, relieved now that he had his Winter Break secured. Now, he only had to deal with the end of the semester.

***

Since the last exam in OChem, the rest of the semester crushed together with enough force to demolish two colliding galaxies. Killua's semester came to a grueling head when a total of five research papers, four exams, and a comprehensive lab report were due by December twelfth. It meant that the last two weeks were accurately defined as unusual and cruel.

The torture, however, was interspersed with the hours he spent almost religiously at the gym after every OChem lecture and lab. It became both easier and more difficult after each session with Gon—he could lift more but at the consequence of his aching muscles, he could run longer but at the consequence of his poor, burning lungs, and he could hold a plank for more than two minutes.

And those torturous endeavors were interspersed with the return to the locker room where, if the empty locker room permitted it, Killua spent with his tongue in Gon's delicious mouth.

Killua shoved Gon back against the lockers, his hands on the metal and his mouth on Gon's. Gon moaned between his lips, sinking against the door to his locker as Killua licked along the side of Gon's tongue and along his teeth. Killua panted against him, gasping as they parted with hot, heady breaths. Killua sucked his lips against Gon's and shivered when he felt Gon's fingers under his cutoff t-shirt. Gon flattened his hot hands against Killua's abdomen and pushed up, dragging the shirt off in one fluid movement. Killua chucked it towards his locker, uncaring and fully focused on Gon's red lips and glittering eyes, sweaty hair and the dark, sweat-stained collar of Gon's shirt.

His skin tasted like salt as Killua licked up the column of Gon's throat. His breath hitched when Gon's wandering fingers passed beneath the hem of his sweats. His eyelids fluttered shut as a curse slipped between his lips.

And then, they heard the locker room door open.

"Fuck," Gon swore.

Killua's breath left him as Gon pulled his hands back and brushed them over the front of his shirt as if to calm himself down. Killua's lungs still burned like a motherfucker from cardio training, but he was totally willing to demolish his throat right then and there at the look Gon gave him. As if Killua could ever hold back when Gon was hot and sweaty against him like that.

The footsteps were heading in their direction, though, so Killua backed off and went to his locker, his eyes stuck on Gon. Gon, who was still flat against the lockers like if he moved, he'd fall over. Killua snickered a little as the guy passed by their aisle on the way to the showers.

Killua looked Gon up and down before turning back to his locker with a little scoff of amusement.

Workouts were the only time Killua allotted to their "distractions". If he let it leave the locker room like he did just two weeks ago in the quad, he'd be screwing Gon up and down the YU campus. His grades didn't have time for that. They had yet to explore beyond tasks allocated to the hands and mouth regions, but fuck it, if Killua wasn't thinking about it every damn day.

He was still catching his breath as he put on deodorant and slipped on a sweater. Gon had somehow managed to solidify his wobbly legs and set to work unlocking his door.

Gon cleared his throat and rasped out, "What, uh... what do you have to work on tonight?"

"Lab report. And then calculus is due at midnight," Killua said. God, it felt like there were needles in his lungs. He couldn't catch his breath. He glanced over at Gon and said, "What about you?"

"I'm just working on my sexual fantasies, you know, the usual," Gon said.

Killua chucked his deodorant at Gon's back. It smacked him dead center on the spine. Gon swore and jumped around to peg Killua with smug grin, snapping his towel in Killua's direction. Killua caught it and, since the showers on the other end of the room were running, he yanked the towel forward.

Gon followed the tug with a grin. Killua met him halfway and, leaning over the bench, touched their foreheads together. "You'll tell me all about them, right?" he whispered, glancing down at Gon's swollen lips. Gon had his bottom lip tucked between his teeth.

"I'll tell you all about what I'm planning to do to you after you're done with finals," Gon breathed against his lips, the mint on his breath intoxicating. Killua never considered himself a minty guy before he met Gon. Bubblegum toothpaste just didn't do it these days.

"Shit," Killua whispered. "If only you knew what I was thinking."

"I would if you told me once in a while," he said.

Killua laughed, cheeks flushing. As if he could ever say any of that out loud. His brain was a cesspool when he wasn't dead set on finishing his homework and passing classes—and the epicenter of it all? Fucking Freecss.

It certainly didn't help knowing that, by this time next week, he'd be temporarily moving in with Freecss.

Before leaving, Gon walked Killua to the scale on the far side of the locker room, just outside of the shower area. Steam from the showers rolled out over the tiled floor as Killua dropped his shoes and backpack off to the side and stepped onto the scale. He shifted the weights around as Gon watched, arms folded, shoulder up against the wall beside the scale.

They had checked his weight at the start of November, back when they had started this entire endeavor. It was a given expectation that Killua would have gained more muscle mass by now. With all of the protein shakes after workouts on top of healthy meals at Ren Hall, Killua didn't doubt that there was a difference.

The scale evened out.

Killua was holding his breath until that point. He let out a gasp of relief and said, "Thank God. One-sixty-five."

"Nice, dude," Gon said, giving him a high five. Killua stepped off of the scale and up against Gon's side for a half-hug.

Off in the distance they heard someone's shout echo across the locker room in the shape of the words, "Sounds GAY!"

Killua snorted, covering his mouth as Gon perked up and said, "Uvo?!"

"GAY!" Uvogin hollered from the opposite side of the locker room. Someone was snickering in the background.

Gon cupped a hand over his mouth and shouted, "You bet your ass it is, whore!"

"Jesus Christ," Killua muttered under his breath.

"You two comparing sizes over there?!" Uvogin bellowed back.

"Yeah, the size of your tits," Gon said. He sucked in a deep breath before screaming so loud his voice cracked: "You've got nice tiddies for a little boy!"

A locker slammed in the general direction of where Uvogin had been taunting Gon.

Gon cursed and ran for it, dragging Killua with him through the shower room. Killua swiped his backpack up, laughing as they skidded through the steam room to the beat of Uvogin's feet thundering across the locker room after them. Killua swore he heard Uvogin snarl, "You bitch-ass cunt!"